Hat trick: Raigen, Ornthoron & Gorillaman all hit Gold 100

posted by kronosposeidon 1 decade 5 years 5 months ago • 1,512 views
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Three of our fellow Sifters recently achieved Gold 100 status: Raigen, Ornthoron, and gorillaman. None of them are American, but let's not hold that against them.



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Brother Raigen not only got to Gold 100 recently, he also had his one year anniversary just a few days ago. He hails from Canada, and it appears he's trying to pass himself off as some smartypants physicist. I ain't buying it. Just look at him. Now I'll admit that I learned a great deal about Canuck culture from him and his brother, but none of it involved any fancy book-learnin'. Drop the charade, Raigen. Get rid of the glasses too. They ain't making you look any smarter. Just stick to making shitty beer commercials, sellout.


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It appears we have yet another Norwegian rising through the ranks, brothers and sisters. We have rasch187, lavoll, and now Ornthoron. Yet another pagan savage has established a firm foothold in Siftland. Ornthoron got his Gold 100 in less than 3 months, which is not too shabby for a non-charter member. And guess what? He ALSO claims to be a smartypants physicist. AND he also claims to be playing the accordian in this video:



Right. I think he's the guy shaving with a straight razor. Sharp shiny objects are pretty.
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Now I know next to nothing about gorillaman's background, outside of the fact that he gets his marching orders from an 82-yr old English monarch. But I really don't need to know more than what we see in the above picture of him in his natural habitat. Just look at gorillaman, then his silverback buddy, and then it becomes obvious as to why he's known as the "gorillaman": They both have perfect butts. Nice, tight, muscular, butts. Butts that legends are made of. Butts that make me proud to be a primate. The heir-apparent to this once-perfect British butt from 20 years ago:



Now if you'll excuse me, I'd like a few moments alone. In the mean time you can congratulate our congratulatees.

40 Comments

rasch187 says...

Congrats Raigen, even though you look like an arctic Unabomber.

Any skeleton that can play the accordian is alright with me, Ornthoron (well, actually I hate the accordian, but as long as you remain a respected employee at the Department of Death I won't hold anything against you, Mr. Calavera). Kongo rats!

And congrats to gorillaman as well! Don't let those animal rights freaks tell you making sweet, sweet love to a silverback is wrong. It is wrong, but don't listen to them anyway.

blankfist says...

Congrats!!!! Major A$$ GR@V33 to all. I will have sex with each one of you now. Take your pants off and get ready to cry.

P.S. Hey KP, did you and gorillaman fuck and make up or something? I remember the two of you wanted to take each other in your mouths and gargle. I mean, I remember the two of you hating each other, and in case you thought the rest of us were going to silently let that pass, I wanted to be the first to bring that back up and make everyone uncomfortable again. Wiener rubs.

Raigen says...

Thank you all oh so much for this shin-dig. It took me a year, and a lot of really lazy and un-motivated hours of stealing videos from other sites to get this far on the 'Sift... But it was all worth it!

Eh?

Ornthoron says...

Thanks, KP! I'm enjoying my shiny new axe and armour. They will come in handy in my encounter with blankfist. I'm crying already, just from the odours from the A$$ GR@V33.

And congratulations to my fellow jubilantes as well. May your promotes be many and bountiful!

schmawy says...

Wowsa, Nice work KP. This is a fine batch of Sifters who have made quite an impression. The Northern Sifters have a distinct advantage though, because they don't go outside during most of the year. Gorillaman has been here forever, so extra props to you even with the new avatar!

Many happy Sifts to the four of you.

thinker247 says...

Raigen, congratulations. You are one of the insightful thinkers on the sift, as proven by your wooly cap. I'm not sure how that proves intelligence, but I guess we could call it a brain cozy?

Ornthoron, you've had some great sifts. My favorite is the "Can you hide your geekiness?" Because I think someone who plays accordion knows that answer. Good song in that video, by the way.

Gorillaman, in honor of your achievement, I think we should grant your wish. We are going to execute everyone whose opinions differ from yours.

Huzzah!

EDD says...

Wow, I'd thunk it was impossible for a likable trio to more or less simultaneously achieve Gold-100 anytime soon, but it's happened. What a pleasant surprise. Now, off to promote all of my videos, you lucky bastards you!

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