Kristen Bell meets a sloth

talk show with Kristen Bell
TheFreaksays...

>> ^EMPIRE:

she's adorably cute (Kristen, not the sloth, although sloths are pretty cool I guess)


No, they're not cool! They are terrifying.

Oh sure, they're adorable hanging out in trees in your National Geographic.
But just wait until the day you wake up on the floor of a Panamanian jungle and look over, half asleep, to see one of those monsters crawling, inexorably, eerily slowly...towards your face. Each outstretched limb like the leg of an improbable hell beast spawn of spider and morlock, covered in green moss like the dried ichor of Yog-Sothoth that birthed the abomination. It's void black eyes piercing into your own as your brain tries to form a maddening scream that will never find your lips, as you lay paralyzed in terror.

Wait for that day. It will happen...oh yes, that day is coming for you too.

I mean, sloths...not Kristen Bell. She's adorable.

00Scud00says...

>> ^TheFreak:


No, they're not cool! They are terrifying.
Oh sure, they're adorable hanging out in trees in your National Geographic.
But just wait until the day you wake up on the floor of a Panamanian jungle and look over, half asleep, to see one of those monsters crawling, inexorably, eerily slowly...towards your face. Each outstretched limb like the leg of an improbable hell beast spawn of spider and morlock, covered in green moss like the dried ichor of Yog-Sothoth that birthed the abomination. It's void black eyes piercing into your own as your brain tries to form a maddening scream that will never find your lips, as you lay paralyzed in terror.
Wait for that day. It will happen...oh yes, that day is coming for you too.
I mean, sloths...not Kristen Bell. She's adorable.

Note to self, do not read Lovecraft before bed when hiking in the Panamanian jungle.

Paybacksays...

>> ^TheFreak:

>> ^EMPIRE:
she's adorably cute (Kristen, not the sloth, although sloths are pretty cool I guess)

No, they're not cool! They are terrifying.
Oh sure, they're adorable hanging out in trees in your National Geographic.
But just wait until the day you wake up on the floor of a Panamanian jungle and look over, half asleep, to see one of those monsters crawling, inexorably, eerily slowly...towards your face. Each outstretched limb like the leg of an improbable hell beast spawn of spider and morlock, covered in green moss like the dried ichor of Yog-Sothoth that birthed the abomination. It's void black eyes piercing into your own as your brain tries to form a maddening scream that will never find your lips, as you lay paralyzed in terror.
Wait for that day. It will happen...oh yes, that day is coming for you too.
I mean, sloths...not Kristen Bell. She's adorable.


To me, Sloths are Badgers on Quaaludes.

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