Oh god I think I've lost my eyes in the back of my head!!!

Wait nope their back.

Well, If they'd just smile, we wouldn't need this.
I don't live in a big city like New York so obviously I just don't understand...

But, what's wrong with Smiling? Saying, "Smile" is like saying, "Cheer up"
I say it to both guys and women alike. I don't feel like being friendly and nice to strangers is a negative thing. My point is, I'd hate for something like this to stop people from trying to share some cheer. It's sort of a catch all reaction to something specific.

This video was touching on much more than smiling. That being said, it can be annoying when people TELL you to smile. It is a bit rude and sometimes embarrassing to single someone out like that especially if you don't know them or what they are going though.

Edit: Also, it doesn't take a large city like New York for constant cat calls to happen. Since the age of 11 I found it awkward to walk or ride a bike to the mall or any other crowded area as I would get honked or yelled and that's coming from a medium/small city in Montana. I'm glad to now live in a place where people typically respect each other's privacy in public.

I'd like to grab a mouthful of that ass. Oh yaaa. I'm I right?

I guess it's just bitchy resting face.

I completely understand.
And I Agree that some guys can be (**********)
but, I guess I just don't live like that.
I completely understand how being told to smile constantly could get annoying.
But.
If I'm saying it to someone, I'm giving it a sincere effort to cheer someone up.., I'm not yelling down the street at some random person.

I guess I just wanted to distinguish between the two.
And I may be naive, but I've only ever heard men call things out like that in movies. I'm not denying that it happens, I'm just saying, I've never seen anyone I know, or witnessed someone doing it. No idea why it would would different in my little world though.

Maybe if you just respected that these women have a problem, they are not you, and they don't know you in particular say it to both men and women.

I find it perplexing that video after video after video is posted on this site, explaining women's experience, and man after man after man post a comment arguing about it.

Please stop making this about you, my friend, and just BELIEVE WHAT THEY SAY. Video after video after video .... there is something that is trying to be communicated.

Having said all this -- I have never been street harassed to the extent that these women have been. I have had folks say to me -- smile! and it hasn't been an issue. I took it the way you mean when you say it. But I don't live where they do. And I believe them when they tell their experiences, even though their experiences don't match mine.

You've boiled the issue down far too much to make an effective point. The video is titled "Stop telling women to smile". Neither of the two women interviewed had anything to say about them being harassed by being told to smile (at least, not that they spoke of on-camera).

Sage's point was that telling someone to smile isn't necessarily harassment, and he's right. I tell people at work all the time "hey, come on man, smile" as a means of trying to cheer them up.

There's a difference between that some random street walker hitting on you, making the title just seem... ineffective. Something more along the lines of "Stop Street Harassment" or "We're not a piece of meat", something that actually explains the problem better than the title the artist chose to go with.

At the end of the day, to me at least, this video is trying to make a larger point about smiling = looking good, women need to look good (or are objectified by men so they need to look good) therefore, women must smile to look pretty for men all the time and STOP telling us to do so!

If it's not that, then the real reason it's called "Stop telling women to smile" eludes me.

I'm not saying that it's not a problem. ANY form of harassment is a problem, weather it be racial, gender, sexual orientation, etc. based. But rallying behind someone being told to smile? That's just meh.

And before you ask, no, i'm not saying that there isn't a problem with harassment. And I'm not saying it's a minor one. I'm saying that "Hey babe, nice tits!" is more something to be offended by. I'm not a woman and get told to smile all the damn time.

That would be incredibly oppressive. Men can act in such shameful ways if the culture permits it. But when every reasonable man and woman has the courage to stand up to that kind of bullshit I think it dies off. Because even selfish men want social acceptance.

I hope the courage of these women sets an example.

@Shepppard, I think you fully understand the issue of why it is offensive to women to be told to smile all the time.

And I still say -- you guys have got to stop arguing with these videos.

I mean, fer pitys sake, it is a cliche already. "You don't listen to me." What percentage of women say that to their male partners?

Listen. Just .... listen. Empathize. Try to understand. And stop arguing with and intellectualizing about something that isn't your experience. Please.

And you get 500 brownie points for understanding exactly why telling a woman you don't know to "smile" gets very very wearing. Make that 5000 brownie points.

I'm afraid you can lump me in the same group. I don't understand why it is offensive to tell women to smile. I'm also in the same boat as others here in that i have literally never, in my existence, heard a male tell a woman to smile in any way that wasn't contextual. Thirdly, i'm struggling to imagine a way in which the directive to "Smile!" is offensive.

You say "stop making it about YOU!" yet you're speaking about a video that is trying to personalise an issue. I hate to even get involved in this argument, because i believe modern day feminism is more about finding an issue than it is about correcting any number of issues that really exist and need attention (ie. wage inequality).

I think you'd serve the cause a lot better if you tried to understand why people make those comments instead of chastising them for making it. You're missing an opportunity to explain the problem better - you've engaged people, people are interested and talking about it. Now is the time to explain it so that those who don't understand can understand. And if you can present it in a believable way, you will convince me.

However if you stand there, fold your arms and say "ugh, guys!" then i'm going to insist that you're behaving in a sexist way.

In my upbringing, i was subject to women abusing their advantageous legal position when it comes to custody of children and such (i was the child). I was witness to women who claimed abuse when there was no abuse, and thankfully only saw a very small effect of what can happen when such false accusations are made. I've seen a close male relative go through divorces in which he made his best attempt to share the assets of the divorce, whilst the female partner did what they could to claw as much profit as possible, eventually taking a completely unfair share (all of it) in one case.

However, i am rational enough to understand that not all people are like that, and that my experiences are not common. If i was given the opportunity to campaign about father's rights, i'd do it clearly and in a way that people could empathise and sympathise with. I wouldn't generalise and i certainly wouldn't tell them not to personalise, because empathy is all about being able to personalise an issue.

If men are arguing with the point, perhaps the point is not being explained well enough. And if it keeps happening, perhaps that's an even stronger message. I wouldn't argue with videos that campaign against domestic violence - which i also haven't seen happen! - and that's because the campaign is well presented so that i am able to grasp the problem.

I don't understand why what this video refers to is a female issue. Add to that the fact that i have never seen it happen with such frequency that it was notably a female-only issue.

Until i am able to understand why this is specifically a female issue, i'm afraid i will consider this video to be sexist in that it addresses a universal issue as a solely female problem.

@danny3141
Thanks for taking the time to write such a thoughtful response.

Of course, I disagree with you completely. Ha.

Women aren't perfect. Men aren't perfect. But do you see that you are doing EXACTLY what these women are complaining about?

They are pretty damn clear -- KNOCK IT OFF. Stop. We're tired of this. Enough already.

And you're saying they have to say it the way you want them to say it. They have to placate and wheedle in order to be heard.

You are telling them to smile before you will listen.

I am not here to offend or start arguments.
I'm sorry if my words have done so.
I do empathize.
I understand the abuse they are drawing attention to.

I also understand that this contextual.
I know that the majority of men don't do this.
In no way am I trying to undermine the message here.

"Empathize but don't make it about me?"
I do empathize, which makes it about me.

I know this happens, I didn't deny it. I've just never bared witness to it. This makes me think the per centage of men that do this is quite low. One woman passing 400-500 men on a street and getting called at, is still a low per centage - and that's if it happens every day. If not, the average is even lower. The area or town is also a factor here. A big city in the US, I'm expecting is far more likely to witness this.

Men that do this, really are among the lowest common denominator. I'm honestly shocked that men even let other men still get away with this crap, never mind encourage it between friends.

On the flip side, telling someone to smile, is a completely separate issue. (An exaggeration is "Men in green shirts rape women, lets ban green shirts")

I know they wanted a catchy title for their art piece. I know they wanted people talking about it. So here we are, Talking about it. And what I'm saying is, I see nothing wrong with encouraging someone to smile, in order to brighten their day. Smiles beget smiles. And a person passing some happiness along should not be villainized.

I just wrote the following in a PM, as part of a much longer message. Thought it belonged here:

But if more energy was spent by you guys who say "I've never seen this, I don't know what you are talking about, prove it, say it differently, convince me" ... well, if instead you just said -- Huh. How about that. Look how this stuff is affecting these women. Why IS it that the men they encounter feel it is okay to intrude on their lives this way, when they are just walking down the street? Where do these guys get the idea that this is okay? Why do they get offended when the women don't respond? What WOULD it feel like if it were me, 4-5-9 times a day being told -- smile, nice ass, hey pretty lady, when all I am trying to do is go buy a pint of milk for my morning coffee? Yeah, I don't do that, you could say. These guys are clearly out of line. But how am I like that, in smaller ways, you could ask?

Maybe when you don't listen and insist that this video has to be softened into being palatable to you. Maybe that is how you are like those other guys.

These women are straight forward and very very clear. And yet you say they aren't. Why is that?

There's just two different ways of saying 'smile'. One's a seemingly avuncular and friendly 'cheer up' and the other's the one these women are talking about, the one that says 'I want you as a sex object, how dare you have an expression on your face other than that which please me?'

Misogynists get away with it for the very reason you are all here defending men's right to tell a total fucking stranger across the damned street to have a specific facial expression. When you say it you want them to not look so down so that YOUR world has more color. It shows no sympathy for whatever the stranger's going through. Its pigheaded ignorant, but not misogynistic, just self centered, but its also a disguise for those who treat women like shit.

2 meh's from the peanut-gallery, one for you and bareboards2-Can't so much stand the holier-than-thou tossing-around of the convenient misogyny label like candy-corns from Halloween houses on the cheap...*edit, can't agree with your black or white sentence beginning with 'just' Engels, do agree however that to suggest that someone act for you according to your desire (like when a mother makes you go kiss yer aunt, etc.) is completely fucked-up programming.

Hope that edit cheered you up a bit there eric, sorry if I altered yer heart rate in some deleterious fashion....

Sorry bb, but who on earth am i telling to smile? And in what way am i being like these other terrible men? And in what way are you accusing me of not listening when i have gone out of my way to investigate the matter further!? I think you're guilty of taking great liberty with my comment, and that's putting it nicely!

My comment, in short, tried to encourage anyone wanting to promote this message to promote it in a way that is understandable and unambiguous, and to learn lessons from those times when your attempt is ineffectual. Well, it wasn't presented unambiguously and that is why people are still discussing it. It's very wrong of you to accuse me of being sexist just because i didn't get the message. It's counter-productive to feminism, in fact, to do that. By folding your arms and saying "huh, you understand it - you're being like all those other men", you're being sexist yourself by definition.

I looked into it, and here's the reason why we seem to disagree and why i seem to be acting sexist in your eyes: I read the title of the video and watched it asking myself this question: "In what way is it sexist to tell someone to smile?" My conclusion was that it wasn't, and so the video was crap. I didn't even give it the full duration - long enough to gauge whether or not i agreed that it was sexist to say "smile!" to someone. That, and nothing more! Because that was how the problem was presented!

So without wanting to repeat my earlier comment, here it is again. It is the duty of the deliverer of the message (or those who subscribe to it) to make it clear what the message is. I completely agree that harassment and cat calling in the street is wrong, and i can understand that stuff like that can make a person feel scared regardless of what is said. And if the video had a more descriptive title or the point established in clear terms then i wouldn't have my name next to the list of downvoters, because i wouldn't have misunderstood the point and given it short shrift.

I think it's very important to realise just how my comment has been taken out of context and misconstrued as sexist by you (in your accusation of me being like those other men). Only after i read a part of your comment which said that it was about a wider issue did i suddenly realise the misunderstanding. Isn't it ironic that you told me i was being sexist by asking for the point to be made clearer, when all along we were talking at cross purposes because the point wasn't made clearly to me?

And yet more ironically, you accused me of being sexist when in fact it was you being sexist to me, in your assumption that my misunderstanding could only stem from sexism!

And i think, to be fair, you should go back and read my previous comment in which i encourage you to ensure that everyone understands your point before you accuse people of being sexist for disagreeing with it.

Well said Engels, and that completely sums up the disagreements in these comments - arguing over a misunderstanding. That's all i needed to understand the problem! Wish your comment was here earlier.

This, very likely, isn't the best video to state this in the comments in, but the more I see videos like this or general SJW/feminist posts on the internet,
I get the impression that as a white herterosexual male any interaction with women is now Tic-Tac-Toe;
the only winning move is not to play.

(This is a general statement and has very little to do with this specific video)

Never mind. Just.... never mind.

http://www.robot-hugs.com/comics/2013-10-10-But%20Men.png

Not sure how that's relevant here. This video addresses the harassment of women BY MEN.

Saying that men are not relevant to the conversation is like trying to discuss crime without considering why the reasons behind it.

Some of the reasons are just that some criminals are arseholes, but sometimes there are cultural or societal reasons. This isn't trying to justify the behaviours, but trying to understand them so we can stop them.

Anyway that comic is just awful. We have a group of presumably women discussing various gender related issues including Trans, women of colour, lesbians, etc. sorry, but what gives these women the right to discuss issues relating to groups they are not part of (they can't all be trans coloured lesbians), but to exclude men. Are we not just another demographic? And yeah, I completely understand the white male hetero privilege thing, but that doesn't mean we don't have a view on a given issue. Unless you subscribe to the Suey Park philosophy?

My point has been, dear @ChaosEngine, is for the men who have shown up on this comment stream to stop talking about themselves and how intellectually this video is wrong for this reason, and that reason, and how they feel it fails, and how it isn't terrible for women to be told to smile because the video title doesn't make sense in context with the majority of the video, and they never do it, and why are these women upset, and this reason and that reason, and all this stuff about what the men here think and feel and it doesn't matter what the women's experience is in the video, they show up and talk about how this video isn't perfect.

That cartoon fits this situation thematically. It was sent to me privately from a man who has been watching what is happening in this comment stream and having private convos about it. HE sent me that cartoon.

But guess what -- nobody wants to talk publicly about how men make this shit all about them and their feelings and their thoughts and them them them them them -- because guess what. They will get a ration of intellectual argument about how they are wrong to criticize any man who comes here to talk about them them them them them.

But sure. You are right. That cartoon has NOTHING to do with this comment stream. Nothing at all. No resemblance to the dynamics. How dare those women not include men!

I stand corrected by the brilliance of your intellectual assessment of the failure of that cartoon.

http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2014/04/15/survey-reveals-mens-rights-activists-are-almost-entirely-white-17-to-20-years-old

Okay, this really doesn't belong here. I don't think this comment stream is laced with comments by the type of man referenced in this article. But I thought it was funny. Written by a man about this type of man.

*promote for the video, not so much the comments which have veered off course. The title of the video could be "Stop Harassing Women." Telling someone to smile, when she doesn't want to smile, right after you've hit on her, when she doesn't want you to hit on her, is harassment. No one deserves to be treated like that and this video and art project are meant to raise awareness for the issue. Just listen to Tatyana's opening statement.

*equality

On a side note, how cool is it that she's has some Vibes in her apartment?

Promoting this video back to the front page; last published Monday, April 14th, 2014 10:55am PDT - promote requested by Fusionaut.

Adding video to channels (Equality) - requested by Fusionaut.

Changed it back to my original title (as seen by the url) as the title has kinda derailed the comments and what the video is actually about.
http://videosift.com/video/Street-Harassment-Of-Women-In-New-York-An-Art-Project

HOW cool?? Uber fuckin' cool

@bareboards2 such withering scorn!

Why are you making a big deal of the fact a male sent you that cartoon? Did you expect that I would respond with something like "oh a MAN sent it? Well, if it wasn't some awful feminazi type, then it must be right!"?? I would have thought that our interactions on this site would be enough for you to realise I don't think that way. The originating gender is irrelevant.

As it happens, I fully agree with the video.

What I dislike is the idea that any group of humans does not have a place in a discussion around interactions between other humans. If this was a discussion about an all-male field (let's say a male pro sports team), are womens opinions not relevant? Sure, you should have some basic knowledge of any subject before you espouse an opinion on it, but I think gender relations is a topic that pretty much everyone has at least some experience of.

The solution to past exclusionary, discriminative or even downright abusive practices is not more exclusionary practices. When Joss Whedon said "feminists are just people who think women are people too" , is that not a useful contribution?

I agree that it's not about making men the subject, but surely a white hetero man's opinion on gender, race and sexuality is no less valid than a black lesbians?

I'm with @Fusionaut. It is just that simple.

Thanks.

The bigger the city the more you need to leave other people alone. the press of humanity is maddening. people construct their own villages within the city, and the people they choose can compliment them.