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16 Comments
newtboyI dunno, felt weird to me!
JustSayingWhy havent I thought of this!?
CreamKHe does have a bigger point thou that isn't mentioned: "The Splashback".. You know, the moment when that toilet water shoots up your ass when you drop the deuce... But in fact, Butters gonna have hemorrhoids and possible even worse conditions (never google rectal prolapse...). By facing in, you're back is straight up, thighs are close to 90 degrees to your back.. It's good for offices, typing on your desktop. That is not how humans defecation works. We are squatters, closer you are to fetal position, the better. That leads to straight ejection where as straight up sitting pushes it out in an angle.. Pretty logical but totally opposite to the way we are going. The low seats are rising up all the time.. You may have to use a shallow stool to prop your feet up.
Also, toilet seat designers, if you see this: males have this appendix between their legs. When you sit down it points downwards in approx 45 degree angle. It does not point straight down nor does in simply vanish. Mine is perfectly average size and the toilet seat i have is very conventional, regular unit. Why does my dong has to touch the inside of the rim everytime i poop? And when are you gonna do something about that splashback? never? Thought so, you are pretty much just morons copy pasting 150 year old design that was a hole in a plane and no water beneath. Note, russians made an effort but that is even more horrible than anything we have now; it's basically a flat plane with the water on the front.. Everything fine except that the flat part is so close to your butt that you have to slowly rise, the water does not flush the dookie but you have to move yourself.. The worst toilet seat i've even encountered outside Polish trains.
Man, there's a lot of semi-accidental puns.. Poop is a funny thing, it seems..
luxury_pieQuit being such a baby and just shit in your hand and throw it against the wall like well mannered monkeys do.
He does have a bigger point thou that isn't mentioned: "The Splashback".. You know, the moment when that toilet water shoots up your ass when you drop the deuce... But in fact, Butters gonna have hemorrhoids and possible even worse conditions (never google rectal prolapse...). By facing in, you're back is straight up, thighs are close to 90 degrees to your back.. It's good for offices, typing on your desktop. That is not how humans defecation works. We are squatters, closer you are to fetal position, the better. That leads to straight ejection where as straight up sitting pushes it out in an angle.. Pretty logical but totally opposite to the way we are going. The low seats are rising up all the time.. You may have to use a shallow stool to prop your feet up.
Also, toilet seat designers, if you see this: males have this appendix between their legs. When you sit down it points downwards in approx 45 degree angle. It does not point straight down nor does in simply vanish. Mine is perfectly average size and the toilet seat i have is very conventional, regular unit. Why does my dong has to touch the inside of the rim everytime i poop? And when are you gonna do something about that splashback? never? Thought so, you are pretty much just morons copy pasting 150 year old design that was a hole in a plane and no water beneath. Note, russians made an effort but that is even more horrible than anything we have now; it's basically a flat plane with the water on the front.. Everything fine except that the flat part is so close to your butt that you have to slowly rise, the water does not flush the dookie but you have to move yourself.. The worst toilet seat i've even encountered outside Polish trains.
Man, there's a lot of semi-accidental puns.. Poop is a funny thing, it seems..
poolcleanerI usually waste a bunch of toilet paper and toss it in before shitting to avoid the splash damage.
Or if you have disposable toilet seat covers, like in public restrooms, cover the seat but don't break the middle part. Instead, let that middle part act as a net, to ease in the deuce. Then just wipe away and the toilet paper acts as the net, coupled with the toilet seat cover.
I haven't had splash damage in quite some time using this method.
He does have a bigger point thou that isn't mentioned: "The Splashback".. You know, the moment when that toilet water shoots up your ass when you drop the deuce... But in fact, Butters gonna have hemorrhoids and possible even worse conditions (never google rectal prolapse...). By facing in, you're back is straight up, thighs are close to 90 degrees to your back.. It's good for offices, typing on your desktop. That is not how humans defecation works. We are squatters, closer you are to fetal position, the better. That leads to straight ejection where as straight up sitting pushes it out in an angle.. Pretty logical but totally opposite to the way we are going. The low seats are rising up all the time.. You may have to use a shallow stool to prop your feet up.
Also, toilet seat designers, if you see this: males have this appendix between their legs. When you sit down it points downwards in approx 45 degree angle. It does not point straight down nor does in simply vanish. Mine is perfectly average size and the toilet seat i have is very conventional, regular unit. Why does my dong has to touch the inside of the rim everytime i poop? And when are you gonna do something about that splashback? never? Thought so, you are pretty much just morons copy pasting 150 year old design that was a hole in a plane and no water beneath. Note, russians made an effort but that is even more horrible than anything we have now; it's basically a flat plane with the water on the front.. Everything fine except that the flat part is so close to your butt that you have to slowly rise, the water does not flush the dookie but you have to move yourself.. The worst toilet seat i've even encountered outside Polish trains.
Man, there's a lot of semi-accidental puns.. Poop is a funny thing, it seems..
eric3579I've always just used a tv tray which snugs up just right for my laptop and any meal i might be having at the time.
mxxconHell ya!
Quit being such a baby and just shit in your hand and throw it against the wall like well mannered monkeys do.
mxxconbuy elongated toilet, then your dong won't touch the rim.
Those Russian "shelf toilets" are actually German in origin.
Why does my dong has to touch the inside of the rim everytime i poop? And when are you gonna do something about that splashback? never? Thought so, you are pretty much just morons copy pasting 150 year old design that was a hole in a plane and no water beneath. Note, russians made an effort but that is even more horrible than anything we have now; it's basically a flat plane with the water on the front.. Everything fine except that the flat part is so close to your butt that you have to slowly rise, the water does not flush the dookie but you have to move yourself.. The worst toilet seat i've even encountered outside Polish trains.
deathcowomg... the toilet is for pooping too?
nanrodWait, what? You have a vestigial organ between your legs big enough to touch the front of the toilet bowl, that can sometimes become infected and cause you all sorts of problems!
He does have a bigger point thou that isn't mentioned: "The Splashback".. You know, the moment when that toilet water shoots up your ass when you drop the deuce... But in fact, Butters gonna have hemorrhoids and possible even worse conditions (never google rectal prolapse...). By facing in, you're back is straight up, thighs are close to 90 degrees to your back.. It's good for offices, typing on your desktop. That is not how humans defecation works. We are squatters, closer you are to fetal position, the better. That leads to straight ejection where as straight up sitting pushes it out in an angle.. Pretty logical but totally opposite to the way we are going. The low seats are rising up all the time.. You may have to use a shallow stool to prop your feet up.
Also, toilet seat designers, if you see this: males have this appendix between their legs. When you sit down it points downwards in approx 45 degree angle. It does not point straight down nor does in simply vanish. Mine is perfectly average size and the toilet seat i have is very conventional, regular unit. Why does my dong has to touch the inside of the rim everytime i poop? And when are you gonna do something about that splashback? never? Thought so, you are pretty much just morons copy pasting 150 year old design that was a hole in a plane and no water beneath. Note, russians made an effort but that is even more horrible than anything we have now; it's basically a flat plane with the water on the front.. Everything fine except that the flat part is so close to your butt that you have to slowly rise, the water does not flush the dookie but you have to move yourself.. The worst toilet seat i've even encountered outside Polish trains.
Man, there's a lot of semi-accidental puns.. Poop is a funny thing, it seems..
PaybackYou people having "splash damage" should probably not wait so damn long so your shit doesn't come out at Mach 3.
...or stop pinching off at the 1 inch mark.
JustSayingRegarding leg angle and and pooping:
If you do the Butters technique, you have the added benefit of facing a wall which gives you the opportunity of placing your feet up on the wall to improve your colon positioning and leg angle, therefore the straightness of the defecation vector. Caution is necessary, though, as you need to grab onto the toilet to avoid launching yourself backside first from the toilet in a motion resembling a jump from a squatting position. This is especially hazardous during difficult defecation acts involving constipation or any kind of pain. Also, you'd want to avoid to give the expression "skidmarks" a new definition as it might stain the Butters technique irreparably.
jmdsays...This thread is nothing but copypasta
Dartley"males have this appendix between their legs" Now I'm no doctor CreamK but I am pretty sure that is not where my appendix is located!
mxxconYOU WILL NOT TELL ME HOW TO POOP!
You people having "splash damage" should probably not wait so damn long so your shit doesn't come out at Mach 3.
...or stop pinching off at the 1 inch mark.
Asmosays...Heh, American's and their huge bowl of water... In Aus, we have a small amount of water at the bottom (1 square of toilet paper covers it nicely and prevents splashback) and then the entire cistern flushes your waste around the sbend, rather than using a pool that drains away, then refills.
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