Why didn't he just drink decaf?

Is it possible to change the title? It spoils the punchline.

Jason Alexander is no slouch, either.

"Diamonds & Rust" was a 1975 song written and performed by Joan Baez, which is said to describe her relationship with Bob Dylan ten years prior. In the song, Baez recounts an out-of-the-blue phone call from an old lover, which sends her a decade back in time, to a seedy hotel in Greenwich Village. She recalls giving him a pair of cuff links, and summarizes that memories bring "diamonds and rust" (time both turns dirty charcoal into beautiful diamonds and shiny metal into ugly rust). Dylan is never specifically named in the song, but Baez has admitted in her memoir as well as in a number of interviews that he is the inspiration for the song. (from Wikipedia)

Or at least a text explanation. I'd love to know how it happened.

This is an old hoax, see

http://www.techcrunch.com/2007/01/28/google-tv-an-elaborate-prank/

Agree, definitely staged.

You ought to be able to reverse this and turn it into a clock or something.

Thanks - I grew up with this and was singing along. I don't remember it seeming so cheesy at back then!