Brother Choggie seems to believe that I received 90 votes for this recent video because, he suggests, I’m an ass-kisser. As flattering as those words are (smooch smooch), I believe people really vote for me because they enjoy my tales of suffering, shame, humiliation, degradation, insecurity, inadequacy, and general stupidity. These sad mini-confessionals make you feel better about yourselves, at my expense. In other words I believe these are pity votes. Not as good as pity sex, mind you, but I’ll take what I can get. I imagine your thought processes go something like this:
Oh God, kp just submitted another pathetic video?! Why does he do this to us?! Oh well, the poor schmuck really has nothing else going for him, so I guess I’ll upvote it anyway. It’s the least I can do for a sifter with a little dick.
So who’s right, fellow sifters and sifterettes, Choggie or I? If I’m right then signify by upvoting everything in my queue, and if Choggie’s right then signify by upvoting everything in my queue. You’re supposed to pity me, remember?