That's no mace, tis but a flail,
I do declare, this clip doth fail!

Super Sprint: The Movie

I'll be in my bunk.

Do you WANT ANTS?!?

I find running curbs rather than increases my appetite. After running I usually don't want to eat for several hours.

Ghosting is speccing the enemy and telling your team their locations.

Yup, Modern Marvels was one of the best, most enlightening shows in the history of television. I even watched, without falling asleep, the episode about paint.

Paintballs don't hurt unless you're playing in the dead of winter.

Yeah but is it going to automatically stir my god damn spaghetti so the outer rim isn't molten lava while the core is frozen solid?

John Wick

Did you not see Birdman? Best movie I've seen in a long while.

Something's wrong, all my paper towels are entombed in some sort of plastic shell. I tried wiping them on spills, but all it did was spread it around!

Coincidentally, North Carolina also has a state-run monopoly on its liquor sales, and NC average teacher salaries have declined by fifteen percent over the past decade.

If I were cynical, I might even say NC is deliberately cultivating stupid people as a resource.

Hey fuck you, John; I love pumpkin spice. PUMPKIN SPICE PANCAKES.

Graduate of the Better Safe Than Sorry School of Glass Doors.