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Weekend Update: Christmas Joke Swap 2023 - SNL

newtboy jokingly says...

Right, he has more practice…but after the “little art films” he’s not getting any protection from the Avengers…he might want to try sleeping on his ferry for a while. I’m pretty certain previous years has ensured he gets no police protection. That’s what I mean by no safe harbor, Che still has home to go to.

“Y’all need Jesus” was great. The Beyoncé joke was good too, pissed off all black women at once, but IMO Jost is definitely in more danger.

cloudballoon said:

I mean... Jost's been living under police (or Black Widow) protection for years since Che's been owning him every Joke Swap. It's something that need not be said anymore.

This is the first time Che's in sweating territory though. From just 3 words! That's a credit to Jost. I think Jost did better this year than any others, even though he still couldn't beat Che (a foregone conclusion).

The fake poet/activist black lady move is genius on Che's part, there's just no win for Jost, and her no contact with Jost is just pure humiliation from beginning to end.

Detective Allegedly Forced Black Girls Into Sex Slavery

newtboy says...

@bobknight33….is this what you mean by “fucking with cops”…because these women and their families sure got fucked by this decorated cop….and he chose them just because they’re black women and he would get away with it.

NYC's Anti-Vax Rally in 49 Seconds

luxintenebris jokingly says...

maybe.

ever see "swing blade"? the main character was undoubtedly very bright but was taught in a very poor school (i.e. alone, abused, and alienated). very little knowledge.

an extreme example but anyone can be intelligent 'tho trapped by their environment. lacking knowledge.

it's kinda like that show on Netflix. the local head of the kkk being exposed to the words and life of that black women. he learned - was shown - that his way wasn't the path he wanted to be on. he wised up.

knowledge leads to higher intelligence. he had the intelligence but lacked any reason to change his views (the Tao of Intolerance). intelligent but terribly influenced.

so these folks might have the ability to learn and adapt, but not the velleity.

intelligence is the ability to acquire knowledge, but w/o some basic knowledge, that intelligence can be retard.

that's me. standing up for an ax* murder, a klansman, and goofy GOPers.

how bright am i?

* not an ax really. it was a swing blade but i like to call them a kaiser blade.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sAgSUFT4cVk

newtboy said:

Sorry, but you and @luxintenebris are confusing intelligence with knowledge. IQ measures your problem solving skills and ability to learn and adapt that new knowledge to new and different situations, it does not just test your knowledge in certain areas.

It's the difference between being shown how to do a task VS being able to figure out how to do a task on your own.

Use of force incident at Walmart in East Syracuse NY

C-note says...

It is law enforcement's responsibility and job to protect and serve. The police are suppose to uphold the law and respect the citizens of the community. It is disrespectful to put your hands on someone and especially disturbing to put your hands on a pregnant woman. This also goes against de-escalation training that law enforcement professionals should already have.

Police responding to a scene are paid professionals doing a job. They are owed no respect. There is no law that mandates police receive any respect. The first amendment freedom of speech grants the right to every citizen to express their feeling no matter how disrespectful to the police.

These officers were out of line. They entered a scene where no crime was being committed and immediately took one side and used excessive force. It is a fact that the highest rate of excessive force and death cause by police is against black women. Black women are killed at a higher rate by police then black men. Black women are abused by police at a higher rate then any other demographic.

Respect is earned. Police in america have no intention of even trying earn respect and do not deserve it. Settlements are the only bright spot and one will be paid.

bobknight33 said:

Why do people act so disrespectful?

If you were pregnant would you act like this?

Use of force incident at Walmart in East Syracuse NY

C-note says...

The police did what they always do when they show up, they immediately put their hands on the black people, which will always escalate the situation resulting in more one-sided violence against the black people. This is why people call the cops. This is the intended result people have when they call the police. Without hearing any sides of the altercation the police chose to get physical and then proceed to drag the black people around. The police were wrong, but they acted as the system intended for them to behave towards minorities. The police will lose in court. The city will pay a settlement to these black women. And finally those who get off on videos like this will have their moment the enjoy another example of white supremacy.

Black Woman should walk a mile in a white woman’s shoes

newtboy says...

His position is 'what if a miracle happened and it reinforced my baseless position....what then?' ....what?
I prefer 'What if right wing nuts could recognize reality and switched political positions to be liberals, and we found out that they are still totally nuts?' as an analogy.

Pretty sure that most black women, given an opportunity to "live in a white woman's shoes" would stay in them....this is so common it's known as "passing"....the reverse is so rare it's known as Dolezaring.

Even they (Fox) aren't this dumb.

Why these Alabama voters are sticking by Roy Moore (HBO)

Mordhaus says...

*quality nutjobs

We are talking about the same idiot that agreed with a conservative talk show host, all the way back in 2011, that doing away with all amendments after the 10th "would eliminate many problems."

The amendments repealed would contain:

13th - Abolishes slavery, and involuntary servitude, except as punishment for a crime.

14th - Defines citizenship, contains the Privileges or Immunities Clause, the Due Process Clause, the Equal Protection Clause, and deals with post–Civil War issues.

15th - Prohibits the denial of the right to vote based on race, color or previous condition of servitude.

19th - Prohibits the denial of the right to vote based on sex.

24th - Prohibits the revocation of voting rights due to the non-payment of a poll tax or any other tax.

26th - Prohibits the denial of the right of US citizens, eighteen years of age or older, to vote on account of age.

Yeah, I could see how making slavery legal again, making it impossible for the people you don't like to be citizens, and preventing undesirables (Blacks,Women,Poor,Young) people from voting would help a certain section of voters.

SpaceX Iridium-1: First stage separation to landing

bareboards2 says...

Okay, folks. History is converging here through six degrees of separation.

Long story. I think it is worth your time.

I grew up with a father who said terribly racist things, the n- word, disparaging remarks about all races. There was much screaming and bitter words from me for a lot of my childhood and well into my 20s.

After he died, I got into a short email exchange with someone I didn't know at all. A former co-worker of my father.

My dad's job, as I have said here before, was Range Safety Officer. His job was to blow up missiles that went off course. (No person has blown up more missiles, and no one will ever catch up to him, since they know how to do it now.)

In my email exchanges with "Teddy", I find out slowly that Teddy is a woman. The first woman in the Range Safety Flight arena. She tells me that she was treated horribly in those early days. Except for three of her co-workers, who mentored and helped her.

One of those men was my father.

Oh.

And then she reveals that she is Hispanic.

Dang.

So my dad talked nasty at home, and acted MORE THAN honorably at work. I wish I had known that when he was alive.

Then she tells me that her daughter became an engineer also, and is currently working in Range Safety.

Wow.

Fast forward to last week. I watch Hidden Figures, the movie about black women helping in the first manned space launches. They were in Langley VA, while my dad was stationed in Cape Canaveral, not NASA but the Air Force, working on unmanned missions. But still. It all came flooding back to me -- how my dad was one of the good guys. (It was also cool to see all the actual news footage of people on the beach and parades and what-all -- I was there with my family, doing those things.)

This reminded me of Teddy. I sent her an email, telling her that I was reminded of her story and how touched anew I was.

Then the Falcon 9 launch happened. This launch on this video.

The next day, I got a response from her. Here is her email to me, lightly edited:

Thank you so much for thinking of me. The 60's were a time quite different than today. This morning It came to me just how far we women have come since then.

I stood on the balcony of my house and watched the launch of a Falcon Rocket take off in all its glory from Vandenberg knowing my daughter was the Lead Flight Safety Analyst on that mission. For the last couple of months I have listened to her tell me about all the problems she has had to deal with in preparing all the destruct lines, impact limit lines and all the other things that go into getting the mission package ready for launch and knowing what she was talking about. Boy, was I jealous. I really miss being in the middle of all that. I was/am very PROUD of my little girl being part of the missions leaving out of Vandenberg and knowing I played a small part in making all that happen just like those ladies in Hidden Figures. I have not seen the movie yet but my friends and I are looking forward to it coming to Lompoc so I can see it

Your Dad would be surprised to learn that most of the new Flight Safety Analysts are now all women.

Thinnest Wood Shavings You Have Ever Seen

police officer body slams teen in cuffs

GenjiKilpatrick says...

Lmao. You're so ignorant it hurts.

"All was cool".. BECAUSE YOU'RE WHITE! Duh.

@_@ omg it's not that difficult a concept to understand.

Let's play a game. Spot the difference:

Sandra Bland - a black women - was violently detained.

Her head smashed into the ground & held down with a knee in her back by two officers. She was held in jail for 3 days before her mysterious death.

Her crime? Failure to signal while changing lanes.

The Charleston shooter - a white male - was detained & arrested without incident.

He - a wanted, armed & dangerous criminal - was handled gingerly.

Approached calmly by officers who almost immediately holster their weapons.
He's politely removed from the vehicle & arrested.
He's even brought fast food as to not violate his rights.

His crime? The hate-based mass-murder of 9 people.


Tell me, Bob.
Can you spot the difference?

Do you really think the media or 5-8% of blacks & their behavior "influenced" the cops in Sandra Bland's arrest?

If so, why didn't the 5-8% of lazy stupid savage whites influence the arrest of racist roof?

Do you really think that white people have absolutely NO advantage in: getting a job, a loan, or not being immediately brutalized by cops?


It's okay. Your stupid, racist, circular-logic answer doesn't matter.
Just want you to think about that for while.

bobknight33 said:

I remember as a kid pulled over and all was cool. Heck I ran from the cops in my car and when they finally got me all they ask was for ID and they let me go. They were looking for someone else. Now it so black and white serious.

How Systemic Racism Works

shang says...

Im not racist, problem is political correctness want's to erase preference. I don't find them attractive. That's not racist. I have 3 black women that work for me. I hired them, but I'd never find them attractive. You can't choose a preference. And if I find it very unattractive then that's a preference not racism.

but sjw collectivism folks will try and spin it any way they can to get their way. So spin it however, I know what it is, and that's all that matters.

Individualism will always destroy Collectivism.

dannym3141 said:

Social Justice Warrior - basically a busy body who spends their time getting offended and trying to police people over it.

But the thing is, @shang is actually racist. "I find all black women disgustingly ugly," is a racist thing to say. No one can pull you up for NOT finding a certain race attractive in all the times you've met their representatives, but to then extrapolate that you definitely must feel the same way about ALL black women is, in my opinion, racist. It is not racist to say that you have never met a black woman you've been attracted to, but that's a different thing to say. You're making a generalisation about an entire race based on a handful of examples.

How Systemic Racism Works

dannym3141 says...

Social Justice Warrior - basically a busy body who spends their time trying very hard to get upset about things and policing people's behaviour in an intrusive manner. It is a little true that social media websites have given rise (perhaps just confidence or a voice) to a certain class of professionally offended moron.

But the thing is, i think @shang is actually racist. "I find all black women disgustingly ugly," is a racist thing to say. No one can pull you up for NOT finding a certain race attractive in all the times you've met their representatives, but to then extrapolate that you definitely must feel the same way about ALL black women is, in my opinion, racist. It is not racist to say that you have never met a black woman you've been attracted to, but that's a different thing to say. You're making a generalisation about an entire race based on a handful of examples.

StukaFox said:

Can someone who speaks Moron kindly tell me what this mouth-breather is on about? WTF is a SJW?

How Systemic Racism Works

shang says...

I'm prejudice but that's because its human nature. I find black women disgusting ugly. But that's just me, I can't see them any other way. Its ugly. I don't like dark tanned women either.

Moron political correctness sjw mongs need to quit labeling preference as racism. I personally find idea of 2 guys rutting gross, heck even Jim carrey puked in his movie after seeing it. Many find it gross, but that's just personal preference.

I won't tell others how to live, but I want to live my way and no sjw PC retard will get me to do otherwise.

Political correctness sjw, want to force everyone into collectivism. That is the sheep herd mentality, unable to think for yourself, everyone copies same morals and ethics and tolerates all.

That is not human

Individualism is human, individual choices, prejudices, morals, ethics and do not tolerate those that try to brainwash you into collectivism.

Even Morgan Freeman recently stated humans are bigoted and must be so its our nature and has allowed our survival and evolution and progress. If we eliminate bigots and force collectivism human progress stops. Evolution ends, no more survival of the fittest, but Mike Judge's idiocracy comes true in a collective political correct society.

Political correct and sjw should be banned and instantly removed for being antihuman, anti freedom and anti individualist. Sjw and PC are true hate groups more lethal and crazier than any fundamental religion.

They are the real terrorists

Straight Outta Compton trailer

lantern53 says...

How many black lives lost to rap music...mmm mmm mmm

East coast vs west coast

Teaching young black men to disrespect black women, disrespect cops.

If we could save one black life, wouldn't it be worth it? It's time to ban rap music!

Who's with me?!

dag (Member Profile)



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