I WANT MY MONEY BACK!

If there's going to be a fart in a video, I want a pavement-cracking ripper louder than a ship's horn. I want a blast radius. I want weeping men and shrieking women. I want people 200 miles downwind to think Bhopal fucked Chernobyl and the offspring came blasting out of that woman's ass like The Four Horsemen riding out of Hell. I want sermons written about it. I want it commemorated in legends as epic as a Viking saga and as long-lived as The Canterbury Tales. I want it spoke of only in whispers. I want the Alpha Centuri LIGO to peg so hard that the aliens look at it and mutter, "Ohhhhhh, fuck..."

This was none of those.

This wasn't a full-on fart, it was an asterisks on a turd. This was a "tee-hee" fart, not a "OH JESUS FUCK -- EVACUATE THE WEST COAST AND CALL THE ARMY!" butt-blast. I'd be ashamed to call this one of my own; I'd wrap it in a blanket and dump it in front of the SPD station down the street so our Boys in Blue could take one look at it, sadly shake their heads, and forswear their sacred duty by tossing it in a dumpster.

Mordhaus, you promised me a fart video and you gave me two monochromatic outcomes of butter and corn syrup consumption babbling on; waddling parentheses around a feeble "pbt".

SIR, I DEMAND BETTER OF MY FART VIDEOS AND I -WILL- SEE YOU IN COURT!!

(I farted)

*related=https://videosift.com/video/Traveling-Downwind-Faster-Than-Windspeed

Traveling Downwind Faster Than Windspeed has been added as a related post - related requested by ant.

*related=https://videosift.com/video/Traveling-Downwind-Faster-Than-Windspeed

Your video, Traveling Downwind Faster Than Windspeed, has made it into the Top 15 New Videos listing. Congratulations on your achievement. For your contribution you have been awarded 1 Power Point.

I want to hear the story of that other spider, the one unfortunate enough to hatch out on the downwind side of the stream. She has to patiently wait for some fortunate upwind spider, hatched with a silver spoon in her mouth, to waft a pilot web over. Then she jumps on it, and has to buffalo the other haughty spider off.

But no, no love for my spider at all.

Most wild animals, you want to stay downwind...

I'd like to see how fast an AC72 would do this course. The wing sails are very different in performance to conventional cloth, and they turn a lot of the conventions of sailing on their heads (they sail faster downwind in more adverse tide due to sailing faster than the wind for example). I know the kite is fast, but is it that fast?

Do you find that your aroma lacks a certain appeal? Can you clear the Savanah after every meal? Does it hurt that your friends never stand downwind?

Have ya thoughta changin' your name, newtboy?

Reporter: "Hobbes, a self proclaimed controlled substances expert.."

"then Quoting Hobbes: " I drove to the location and drove around the entire property, once I was downwind from the location, I could smell the strong odor of chemicals. I formed the expert opinion, that the location is being used as a clandestine methamphetamine lab site."

Listen to the retarded language of these bumblers-Slip-shod redneck petty-thug punks off the chain in Bumfukistan L.A. County....Buncha real fucking "experts."

>> ^blankfist:
That scenario is needlessly specific and extreme. Every argument a statist makes against a voluntary society seems to be some extreme work of fiction involving a rogue and crazy Bill Gates doing terrible things to a defenseless group of people.
The answer to your question, I don't know what I'd do. Who could plan for that? You want a system that guarantees something that's unlikely, and that's looking at it the wrong way. There's also no known protections against an alien invasion.


How about this. I'm pretty sure my neighbor stole my bong. He denies it and refuses to let anyone on his property to check. How do I, as a reformed former-statist, rectify the situation without violating the rights of my neighbor?

That was such a great bong too. I've been hauling away some friends' old tires and trash for a small fee so I had a little extra money to spend. I don't have a place to store that stuff, but it's fairly easy to burn it on the far corner of my property. Sure the fumes are toxic, but that only affects the people downwind of me. Some of those people have complained, but do they really have any other options that don't involve shooting me?


These are, of course, not about the specific situations. People are often assholes that care more about what benefits them than what affects others, and I doubt removing government will change that. These kinds of situations come up fairly often, so how does your ideal citizen and/or government (or lack thereof) handle situations similar to these?

Note: I'm not trying to disprove your stance, I'm just trying to figure out what it is.

No. I don't know what the hell this video was supposed to be demonstrating, but it clearly has fuck-all to do with sailing downwind faster than the wind.

It looks like he was trying to build a cross between a bicycle and one of these:
http://videosift.com/video/Can-you-sail-downwind-faster-than-the-wind

Unfortunately, I don't think that green drum he's using is doing anything as a propeller.

Anybody else hear the giddy laughter at 25 seconds? Either someone's downwind or an anti-drug advocate just popped a boner.

So when do they start burning huge piles of Vioxx and Ambien?

QUICK! EVERYONE GET DOWNWIND!!