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Directed by Bill Hader's wife. He's a nice guy, she looks normal, but the movie is all blowjobs, masturbation, other crap you wouldn't want to expose your family to. Wonder how her parents feel about it. Her dad went with her to the premiere but her mother wouldn't. I don't blame her.

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Your video, Aubrey Plaza's Masturbation Scene Was Um, Awkward, has made it into the Top 15 New Videos listing. Congratulations on your achievement. For your contribution you have been awarded 1 Power Point.

I was hoping to see a masturbating bear.

This is almost as exciting as the time when we were kids when you taught me how to masturbate. Remember that? Good times. Well what can I say that hasn't already been said? Oh yeah - eat a monkey disk!

The problem isn't the sexual aspect of breasts, that's perfectly fine, it's our unability to perceive anything but. Before evolution made breasts the bouncy fondling fun we like to enjoy, they were a source of nourishment.
It's awkward and embarrassing because of our limited view, our lack to subconsciously process the whole concept behind it.
Imagine everytime we'd saw a hand, we'd think "Masturbation!"
Handshakes would be sooo awkward.

should change the title from Louis to Lewis....
When I see "Comedian Louis" I automatically think of Louis C.K.

Kinect for 360 can't detect facial features, but it's still great for robots.

I will re-coin the classic:
"Every time you masturbate, Microsoft kills a kitten on God's behalf."

The thing I would say is if Justin Beiber did it I would be ok with it because maybe a hundred million people would send in money to support the Vets. With Bush doing it I would say the same thing, although I'm not sure that's true. Maybe I'm wrong but I don't think Bush has the kind of support he used to have. If people are still following him and paying attention than yeah this is great. However I can see a lot of people being turned off by this as well, although maybe that would happen if Beiber did it too, I don't know just whatever. Bills wrong, he gets a lot of things wrong.

Holy shit Brit Marling...I love Another Earth but seriously get off that show.

Here's what I don't like. Liberal Cunts saying shit like "Well he's justifying what he did and it was awful." What HE Did. HE Didn't do it like some kind of Dictator you idiot. The fact that you sit around masturbating with iGadgets is why this fucko and his cronies were back in office in the first place. We have SOO many privileges and shit is sooo easy for us here but none of you bother to organize you just collect your thoughts for bitching. It's like America and it's Democracy are the latest piece of shit iSomething you bought, and you're rolling out of bed to make a comment on a blog post "Yeah I like some of it but other parts are just messed up I don't know what they're doing with my stuff." This is LIFE Mother Fucker in one of the Freest nations to ever exist in History, Wake up and participate.

People in Fucking Turkey are protesting while getting destroyed because they fucking care so much. If you care you would've done something, but you didn't you sat there and whined because you're a consumer. You've been completely neutralized and all you can do is sit there watching the rest of your life tick by.

Bush wasn't a Dictator, he was a dude that got elected and brought in a whole ton of other dudes who ruled the country before, and fucked it up plenty. Wake the fuck up and stop blaming others.

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away?
Well if your name was AAAHHWYUEYUEYEYEYYYEWEEEUUUUEEEEEE
You'd run away too...

Why does Helen Keller wear skin tight pants? So you can read her lips!

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Polio! she had everything else.

Why was Helen Keller's belly button bruised? Her boyfriend was blind, too.

Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand? So she can moan with the other.

nyuck nyuck nyuck