I can see this movie becoming a 3am classic

"I don't think you have the balls."

i really think that cockpuncher logo would be the best tattoo ever.

Looks cheaply produced, badly written and poorly acted.

Can't wait!

Edit: No, seriously, I'll be first in line- love the Onion.

cheaply produced? just take a look at the slow-mo cockpunching while riding the bike and those seriously RAD flame effects!!! AND factor in Steven Seagal's salary! this would be anything but cheap.

ok, seriously, just admit it - you'd watch it if it was an actual flick

and one last thing - have I missed something or was this the first time Seagal "had the balls" to make fun of his screen image? if so, that alone deserves the upvote.

An Onion Movie? Yay!

Would rather go see this than "The Asparagus Saga"

Freaking awesome

Seagal upvote. He was great in Executive Decision to go Out for Patriot Justice while Under Siege on Deadly Ground 2.

I smell another Kentucky Fried Movie!

seagal should allow for 2 upvotes... cant wait!

Looks cool, but is this for real? This is the Onion after all. According to the interwebs, there was going to be a movie, then that was canceled or something, and baby jesus took over the white house with nothing but a chainsaw and a couple propane tanks while Captain Dan & the Scurvy Crew were singing authentic pirate hip-hop in the background and Elzar brought out his spice weasel and was all like "Let's knock this scene up a notch. BAM!" as he squeezed the spice weasel into Gore Vidal's crème brûlée, which was still on fire because Wikipedia said this: "In November 2007, President Sean Mills told Wikinews that the movie is a dead project. Although the studio Fox Searchlight has an option to release it on DVD, there are currently no plans to do so. Everyone involved in the project from the writers, to the directors to the studios, decided the material simply was not working. However the trailer appears on the DVD for The Darjeeling Limited. Because of the trailer's recent appearance on the DVD for the Darjeeling Limited, there is some speculation that the movie will be released on DVD later in 2008."

However, for all your produce video needs, the pirates who don't do anything will more then suffice.

Upvote for cockpuncher!

i laughed.

i plotzed.

i updated my avatar pic, for a little while.

*dead

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