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Gåte - Ulveham (Live ESC national finals)

Gåte - Ulveham (official video)

Iceland bringing the hits!

The Watermelon Joke That Saved Me After I Got Pulled Over

luxintenebris jokingly says...

moonsammy: great take. thumbs-up! crystalized my thoughts exactly!*

a couple of rules of comedy are 'know your audience' and [the joke] 'it has to be funny'. if there is no laugh, either you told it wrong, told it to the wrong person, or your wrong about it being funny. your audience is the final judge. not their duty to laff at your doody joke.

stukafox: okay [btw: the watermelon joke is very old] but not going w/the worst or nastiest, just with a few of old risqué ones.

novice is riding back to the convent w/the mother superior on their bicycles through the medieval section of the town. mother superior tells the novice "let's cut through this alleyway". the alley is long, rough and bumpy but the novice agrees. when they get back on the regular route the novice says, "that was new! I've never come that way before!" mother superior says, "it's the cobblestones."

a woman notices her neighbor's tomatoes are fully ripening while her's are still green. she asks him "how do you get your tomatoes to ripen so quickly?" he tells her, "I get up around dawn while I'm still in my bathrobe and open it and flash them. they get so embarrassed they turn red." women tells him she's going to try it but later in the evening. the next day, the neighbor sees the woman and asks "so? did it work?" the woman turns to tell him, "no. it didn't - but YOU SHOULD SEE MY CUCUMBERS!

an old woman was talking w/her younger friend. old woman tells her about some of the older woman in town. "oh! don't let them fool you! they were pretty wild in their day! " then she went on and listed all the men a trio of sisters went through and each tête à tête they had. the list was shockingly impressive enough that the younger woman said, "gee...maybe they couldn't help themselves...maybe they suffered from a hereditary disease?" the old woman cocks her head back and eyes the younger woman then says, "hereditary? hell! yes! it was! it was IN THEIR JEANS!!!"



*david letterman

Ossoff to Perdue: ‘You’re a crook’

Star Wars Resistance's Season Premiere Episodes (playlist)

Steve Burton Struggles To Contain Flailing Alligator

The Hamilton Mixtape: Immigrants (We Get The Job Done)

eric3579 says...

You know, and it gets into this whole issue of border security
You know, who's gonna say that the borders are secure?
We've got the House and the Senate debating this issue
And it's, it's really astonishing that in a country founded by immigrants
"Immigrant" has somehow become a bad word
So the debate rages on and we continue
And just like that it's over, we tend to our wounded, we count our dead
Black and white soldiers wonder alike if this really means freedom
Not yet
I got one job, two job, three when I need them
I got five roommates in this one studio, but I never really see them
And we all came America trying to get a lap dance from Lady Freedom
But now Lady Liberty is acting like Hilary Banks with a pre-nup
Man, I was brave, sailing on graves
Don't think I didn't notice those tombstones disguised as waves
I'm no dummy, here is something funny, you can be an immigrant without risking your lives
Or crossing these borders with thrifty supplies
All you got to do is see the world with new eyes
Immigrants, we get the job done
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
We get the job done
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
Immigrants, we get the job done
It's a hard line when you're an import
Baby boy, it's hard times
When you ain't sent for
Racists feed the belly of the beast
With they pitchforks, rich chores
Done by the people that get ignored
Ya se armó
Ya se despertaron
It's a whole awakening
La alarma ya sonó hace rato
Los que quieren buscan
Pero nos apodan como vagos
We are the same ones
Hustling on every level
Ten los datos
Walk a mile in our shoes
Abróchense los zapatos
I been scoping ya dudes, ya'll ain't been working like I do
I'll outwork you, it hurts you
You claim I'm stealing jobs though
Peter Piper claimed he picked them, he just underpaid Pablo
But there ain't a paper trail when you living in the shadows
We're America's ghost writers, the credit's only borrowed
It's a matter of time before the checks all come
But
Immigrants, we get the job done
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
We get the job done
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
Immigrants, we get the job
Not yet
The credit is only borrowed
It's America's ghost writers, the credit's only borrowed
It's America's ghost writers
America's ghost writers
America's ghost writers, the credit's only borrow-borrowed
It's America's ghost writers, a credit is only borrowed
It's America's ghost writers, a credit is only borrowed
It's America's ghost writers, a credit is only borrowed
It's
Immigrants, we get the job done
Ay yo aye, immigrants we don't like that
Na they don't play British empire strikes back
They beating us like 808's and high hats
At our own game of invasion, but this ain't Iraq
Who these fugees what did they do for me
But contribute new dreams
Taxes and tools, swagger and food to eat
Cool, they flee war zones, but the problem ain't ours
Even if our bombs landed on them like the Mayflower
Buckingham Palace or Capitol Hill
Blood of my ancestors had that all built
It's the ink you print on your dollar bill, oil you spill
Thin red lines on the flag you hoist when you kill
But still we just say "look how far I come"
Hindustan, Pakistan, to London
To a galaxy far from their ignorance
'Cause
Immigrants, we get the job done
Por tierra o por agua
Identidad falsa
Brincamos muros o flotamos en balsas
La peleamos como Sandino en Nicaragua
Somos como las plantas que crecen sin agua
Sin pasaporte americano
Porque la mitad de gringolandia es terreno mexicano
Hay que ser bien hijo de puta
Nosotros les sembramos el árbol y ellos se comen la frutas
Somos los que cruzaron
Aquí vinimos a buscar el oro que nos robaron
Tenemos mas trucos que la policía secreta
Metimos la casa completa en una maleta
Con un pico, una pala
Y un rastrillo
Te construimos un castillo
Como es que dice el coro cabrón?
Immigrants, we get the job done
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
We get the job done
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
Immigrants, we get the job done
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
Look how far I come
Immigrants, we get the job done
Not yet

All species billions of years old-Evolution explained

Nephelimdream (Member Profile)

Flying Over Mars

Inside an Illustrator's Mind: Craig Frazier

It's Not Easy Being Green [especially if you're The US Navy]

Bomba Estéreo - Soy Yo (Official Video)

ulysses1904 says...

I'm working on a translation by ear, don't want to cheat and Google the lyric.
so far I can tell the refrain repeated 3x:

No te preocupes si no te aprueban - don't worry if they don't approve of you
Cuando te critiquen tú solo di Soy Yo - when they criticize you just say I am Me

Moana Official US Teaser Trailer

ChaosEngine says...

The Maori name for the North Island of NZ is Te Ika-a-Māui (the fish of Maui). Apparently the "fishing up island" bit was quite a hit in the pacific, 'cos he did it several times



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