>> ^berticus:

what? no comment yet from someone saying how bullying "toughens you up and prepares you for the real world"? COME ON!


ok i'll start. im all for moderate measures to be taken to monitor and disrupt bullying (man, that almost became full alliteration). that being said, the bullying scandal and the myriad documentaries and specials and exposes on the subject are just redundant. as someone who works in the school system bullying really isnt any different than when i was in school, or when my parents went to school, or their parents, etc. bullying isnt anything new. calling it an epidemic is laughable and just plain absurd.

does my heart go out to individuals who have been bullied? absolutely. i myself was constantly bullied growing up (both at school and at home). now berticus, what you said is true even if you were being facetious. being bullied forced me to quickly develop social skills needed to diffuse confrontations among other things. it sharpened my wit, even as an adult. the point isnt that we need bullies to make men out of our children. the point is bullies arent anything new, and they will always be with us. react accordingly

And I'm no nearer to understanding your point, it seems. Most of us are talking about the specific events in the video, but you seem to be making a sweeping generalization about adherents of certain political philosophies.

I do agree that confronting a cop at a random traffic stop isn't a way to affect societal change. It's also not likely to result in you being let off the hook for whatever thing they stopped you for.

But I don't really think that's something high-level like political ideology, so much as a more fundamental question of emotional self-control, and learning the requisite social skills for dealing with authority figures.

>> ^chilaxe:

When liberals and libertarians makes themselves get tazed, it's because they're trying to resolve whatever complaint they have at the moment instead of after the fact.
If they believe they shouldn't have to comply with lawful orders, or that cops should be nicer, they could deal with it after the fact or before the fact by making legislative efforts, and if the voting population agrees with them, they'll be successful.

I know 2 women who are professional open-source programmers, and 1 woman who is a systems administrator. The programmers are both well-deserved 'superstars' in their fields. All of them blog and speak (complain?) extensively about the problems of being a woman in the industry. It's not trivial -- they've had to take legal action in the past when men sexually harassed them at conferences. Part of the problem is that this field is a boys club, and an extension of that problem is that this particular boys club is one where a lot of the boys have poorly developed social skills.

TL;DR men are shit.

i don't feel like there has to be a difference in the rhetoric and the reality. and find that statement kind of cynical.

my kids are allowed all kinds of crazy freedoms with their hair and dress and expression and creativity and language and their interests are almost always highly encouraged by me and my tribe.

princesses weren't a non existant part of playtime when my daughter was younger, at that point i thought it was an archetype and all little girls go through that phase. and i still kind of think that. but i think it can be overly nurtured in ways that are obnoxious. anyway, princess phase was short lived and generally took a back seat to her desire to be a fairy or a piano playing shark. i could think of million reasons to hate barbies, but i decided not to, she has barbies ... she just isnt real interested in them. bratz dolls are actually just amazingly whorey and negative and are just way overboard, so.. fuck no. she's too old for them now anyway.

my biggest issue is over commercialization, so we simply have no television. they watch movies and what not. and actually i feel like limiting the television and commercialization has helped them development loads of creativity. which is actively encouraged around here. it's totally possible to imbue your kids with your values without forcing your political agenda down their throats.

i'm extremely interested in how much of my kids personalities and social skills are due to their lack of exposure to what's "trendy" and how much of it is just inherent. . my niece is the same age as my daughter, she's been hooked on the disney channel since birth. "fitting in" and keeping up with trends and being "like" her peers is extremely important to her. my kid couldn't care less. but that was also the difference between her mom (my sister) and i when we were kids.

i used to worry more about my son being able to fit in with more mainstreamed peers. seeing as we have no television, he knows 0 about spiderman or transformers or sports, he has 0 male role model to emulate and has been raised entirely by a bunch of women. but he's having no trouble "fitting in" with other boys. my daughter on the other hand is having loads of issues with socialization. she has no interest in what other 8 year old girls seem to be interested in. honestly, at this point, if hannah montana would help her make friends, i'd consider getting cable. but she just thinks it's stupid.

i'm interested to know if that's her just being a mature, heavily artistic, tomboy, with a dose of shyness or if the persona's of little girls are just so entirely shaped by television and trends that she's finding it impossible to relate them without it. i suspect its probably a bit of both. and i find the latter extremely sad.

>> ^blankfist:

@<a rel="nofollow" href="http://kids.videosift.com/member/spoco2" title="member since August 21st, 2006" class="profilelink">spoco2, good point. But I'd have to wonder why I'd want to stop him or her from following what they want even if it's trendy. Is it because of how I feel about it? If so, that's not a very good reason at all.
I dislike commercialization like the next guy, but is it fair for me to push my own personal politics onto my child? I say no. Sure, wearing high heels at five may be a bit extreme, but most parents use those extreme examples as justification to stifle their children's self-expression at less extremes. In other words, the rhetoric is "my five year old daughter is not wearing heels" but then in reality it's "my ten year old son is not getting a faux-hawk/mohawk" or "my daughter is not getting a Barbie doll".

I'm a massage and aquatic therapist for people with physical disabilities (and sometimes accompanying intellectual disabilities)
I provide intensive in home behavioral and life skills support to a woman with a physical disability, an intellectal disability and major behavioral challenges
I work with adolescent boys with autism and asperger's fostering social skills, broadening their scopes of interest and focusing on dealing with stress and anxiety.
And I also babysit a man who is blind and has autism a few times a month. He's my super buddy.

My job is awesome cause it allows me to tap into the things I'm best at in life. I don't have to sit in anyone place for very long, I go somewhere different everyday and do something different everyday and have creative control over the activities. I basically have no "boss", I have set of standards and am accountable to the state for proper documentation and following ethical guidelines, but I don't have to "check in" with anyone. My schedule is between me and my clients. As a single mom, that's something thats invaluable to me. If my kids get sick, I just call my clients and reschedule, there are no "write ups" or "attendance policies" and "tardiness" isn't an issue. If I get stuck in traffic I just call and say "hey, give me 5 minutes". I will never be written up for being 5 minutes late 3 times within 3 months ever again. I also, the most appropriate thing to wear just happens to be sweat pants and tshirt. fuck yes!! i work in my pajamas.

down sides: It doesn't pay enough and I have no benefits package or worker's compensation insurance.

You are such an awesome mum...

In reply to this comment by UsesProzac:
I'm so excited to homeschool my son. I'm not religious at all and don't want to shelter him from that sort of thing in any way; it's fully up to him how he decides to go in that regard. I'm just picky and I have no faith in the school system here in the US. He's a year old and I've been working on teaching him basic sign language for the last six months. It helps a lot in figuring out what he wants and needs.

Social interaction isn't something I'm worried about. It's easy to find groups of like-minded parents to mingle with. There's a slew of athletics and groups to participate in that will easily provide a healthy camaraderie and social skills. Summer camp, specific classes in schools for only a certain part of the day, museums and libraries, etc. Lots of ways to work around it. It takes a lot of effort to meet those needs but for my son, I'm willing to work my ass off to ensure a rich, engrossing education tailored just for him. I won't stifle him and I'll encourage his interests and passions and hopefully, he'll be more ready for college than I was. Or ready to do whatever he loves and be successful at it.

You don't need a teaching degree to know how to impart knowledge and wisdom, to give someone the tools to think and reason and make their own way.

I'm so excited to homeschool my son. I'm not religious at all and don't want to shelter him from that sort of thing in any way; it's fully up to him how he decides to go in that regard. I'm just picky and I have no faith in the school system here in the US. He's a year old and I've been working on teaching him basic sign language for the last six months. It helps a lot in figuring out what he wants and needs.

Social interaction isn't something I'm worried about. It's easy to find groups of like-minded parents to mingle with. There's a slew of athletics and groups to participate in that will easily provide a healthy camaraderie and social skills. Summer camp, specific classes in schools for only a certain part of the day, museums and libraries, etc. Lots of ways to work around it. It takes a lot of effort to meet those needs but for my son, I'm willing to work my ass off to ensure a rich, engrossing education tailored just for him. I won't stifle him and I'll encourage his interests and passions and hopefully, he'll be more ready for college than I was. Or ready to do whatever he loves and be successful at it.

You don't need a teaching degree to know how to impart knowledge and wisdom, to give someone the tools to think and reason and make their own way.

And this video my friends, just showed us exactly what is the bad part about homeschooling.
You get 0 (zero. Z-e-r-o) social skills.

>> ^therealblankman:
What's it to you, creep?


I'll jot that down as 'single, with a lack of social skills and an unhealthy anime fetish'.

I firmly believe that an individual that has no function as you call it for love is your sociopaths... to me they don't seem to propagate so well within society....

You're very right. Sociopaths have a very hard time adjusting to life. They might be missing some of these hardwired conditions that we have. I'm not quite an expert on the subject, but it does make sense that somebody with so much trouble with social aspects of society will have a hard time propagating. Hence why we're not all sociopaths. It's usually a genetic mutation that stops at a generation or two. Unless something changes drastically in our environment around us, sociopathic people will never have an advantage to breeding over people that can practice social skills.

(gwiz&rotten)for me i don't think you actual believe what you write you just write to play the devil's advocate.....

I can assure you I'm not advocating the devil...that'd be just as worthless as advocating god. Yes I do "believe" what I'm saying. Namely that's just how I understand things based on my cursory knowledge of neurology, psychology, and evolution.

>> ^syncron:
This is a look into the future when the current generation of WoW players age and start families.


You're assuming these WoW players have the social skills to find a suitable mate and actually figure out a way to start a family.

The liberal socialists have made policework a damned-either-way proposition. Imagine the outcry if the police chief had tackled the girl or pepper-sprayed her instead. It would be the same calculated hysteria, differently-worded.

Cops exist in part to deal with people with no social skills; there are going to be situations where it doesn't matter how much grace the cops have; they're still dealing with defiant scum who will ensure the encounter ends badly, either because they don't give a fk or because they reasoned if they look more like victims during an arrest they'll escape justice.

Running from a cop is a crime. The wrongful assumption here is that a cop can only use force when directly threatened, yet s/he is just as justified to use force to protect others, including the victim. The young lady running away could have just as easily ran out into traffic, killing herself or causing an accident which resulted in the deaths of others.

When a dumbass of any age, race, creed or color challenges a Taser, they are not only securing a place in youtube history, they are choosing to become unpaid subjects, testing the limits of the device itself. Needles, wires, sparks, flames, explosions, all the possible outcomes have just been given a receipt.

Internet Armchair Police always know the exact level of force each situation requires. I don't care for cops myself, but they are owed the benefit of the doubt and more respect than given here.

Michael had his own cutting-edge music studio in his home. His own personal studio. It was featured in a rare interview with him that I haven't been able to find again. You can bet he has hundreds and more songs recorded and archived that we've never heard. That's what he did, That was his life, his hobby, his pastime. On top of that, riffs and beats, and unfinished stuff that can be mixed into many more productions and music. We'll be hearing from him for years!

Michael in my opinion, is like many of the geniuses I have met in my life - And I have had the pleasure to meet several. People with genius talents are socially inept and awkward when it comes to everyday stuff you and I take for granted. They have huge overdeveloped areas of one interest and that has become their one way of functioning and all else flows through that.

Through his music, he has been Amazing, Creative, Fantastic, Mind Blowing, Conceptual, Empathetic, Worldly, Sympathetic to world issues and causes and had a special place in his heart for kids.

He didn't get a childhood, he was forced into music as if it was all that was all that existed. His only fault is that he was good at it and used it as a shield from his fathers anger and did what he was told. As a young mind, his music developed unfathomable amounts but his social skills never evolved. It has been proven that with personal and emotional trauma, the mind is forced to stop developing past that point until that trauma is dealt with. Michael's challenging childhood forced him further into his music and his talents (which was great for us), but at a cost we may never understand (for him).

I for one, have always judged him by his artistic achievements in style, dance and music and chose to ignore the high-profile gossip and drudgery.

His death leaves a huge hole in the heart of the industry! RIP

Sniper. Dude. You don't think that decades of neurological research qualify scientists to predict brain development? And when I say predict, I mean that they are pretty gosh darn sure about this. They aren't just guessing based on probablility that Dani will never be "normal". They KNOW that the brain develops language and social skills in certain parts by a certain time. People who miss the window of opportunity can't get it back. Excluding divine intervention, it's not a matter for debate. Her brain just isn't capable of traveling backward in time and developing all over again.

It's nothing personal.

>> ^Sniper007:
I find it amazing that anyone at all (including neurological experts) can assume that they have such a complete understanding of the human mind that they'd feel confident enough to predict in advance the limit to which an individual can perform. Didn't the experts say she'd never walk? Didn't they say she'd never be able to interact or focus like a normal person? Haven't the experts ALREADY been proven WRONG, even when examining this specific case alone? Why would anyone ever believe that she can't be normal?
I think the error is somewhere between 'Ability' and 'Probability'. She has the physical capacity to do everything any other woman can do. No doubt. Ability is not the issue. The issue is Probability. She Probably WON'T attain those levels of competence based on the choices of those around her (first), and her own choices (second). The preceding statement is only reasonable based on our experiences with similar past cases. Even in those cases however, it must be acknowledged that some individuals may have had an ability to advance that was not fulfilled due to a lack of desire to advance.
Never underestimate the power of the human mind and will.

I'm sure it's real, but it's more an inside view on what a fubar family is like and a kid that grew up getting more emotional involvement and interaction in video games then from his actual family. His mom needs to help the guy grow up and get a life. Don't just support him and give him everything he wants and then cry because all he cares about are his games. Make him get a job or go to college, and learn some social skills. He's clearly a bright kid and he could do well and he'd learn theres more to life. The hot girl 'friend' who is constantly playing games but clearly has no intention on ever getting together with him, isn't helping.

Also I agree with some above that calling obsessive behavior like video game playing an addiction does a disservice to actual addictions, chemical addictions. This kid is simply obsessed since childhood. Something tells me he was raised more by playing games then by any sort of adult figure.

I am a game lover and have been since I was a child (when video games first became big with the atari.) I've been playing games for years and I never stopped and to this day I am very eager about new games coming out that I'm looking forward to. But I also am married and have a daughter and a healthy social life. I play games nearly every day, but it's half an hour or an hour at a time and more on the weekends.

This kid needs to be forced to grow up and learn that you can love video games and lead a healthy and enjoyable life.


Loved the Max Payne shtick though.