You can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble-sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapours; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a miniraft down the slow heavy River Moth; wet it for use in hand-to-hand combat; wrap it around your head to ward off noxious fumes or avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (a mind-bogglingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you — daft as a brush, but very very ravenous); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course you can dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.

More importantly, a towel has immense psychological value.

Remember, if you go to a hotel, always bring your own towel. You never know where a hotel towel has been.

Your video, Hydrophobic Water Makes Dry Water, has made it into the Top 15 New Videos listing. Congratulations on your achievement. For your contribution you have been awarded 1 Power Point.

This achievement has earned you your "Pop Star" Level 86 Badge!

So instead of a shower we can be dry cleaned? What will I do with all those towels I bought?

Highly edited makes it fake....and just dumb. Editing hours of speaking for one minute of stuttering is laughable, especially since you can get the same amount of inability to speak from any two minutes of any Trump speech.

Every time you feel like talking shit about your president, remember, Joe kicked Trump's ass handily without breaking a sweat. Trump pulled out all the stops and spent hundreds of millions he didn't have, Biden, as you loved to say, campaigned from his basement and had millions left over. Even taking it easy, Biden beat Trump like a red headed step child.
Why?
Because Trump is a proud unapologetic and constant liar, he's deranged, evil, hyper criminal, mentally unstable, old, feeble, pedophilic, narcissistic, divisive, dumb, treasonous, a repeatedly convicted fraud and thief, likely a pill popper, a rapist dozens of times over by his own admission, 100% disloyal, a child abuser, and cannot string together an entire sentence or pronounce English. His administration had more felons, and committed more felonies than all administrations before him, and more Americans unnecessarily died from his actions and lack thereof than in almost all wars America has fought combined (besides the civil war)
Biden sometimes has temporary trouble speaking smoothly.
Thousands of videos point this out, but you are willfully blind. I'm certain his inability to speak or walk up or down stairs or ramps or to think won't stop you from voting for Trump in 24, ensuring a second Biden term. I think you'll vote Trump even if he's in a prison hospital drooling on himself.

This is the problem with Trump derangement syndrome, it makes you not comprehend that everything you want to complain about from Biden is 10 times worse in Trump. Whatever ridiculousness you spout about Biden's abilities only makes his wiping the floor with Trump without effort all the more delicious...so sure, Biden is old, stuttering, feeble, weak, and tired....and he kicked Trump's ass in a historic landslide from his basement without even trying, and continues to thoroughly kick his ass in approval ratings. LMFAHS!!

Joe has the cognitive skills to be Potus, always has, and most of America agrees....more than EVER thought Trump was qualified in any way, especially cognitive skills. Remember the redrawn hurricane map he was so demented he thought looked unadulterated with his fat sharpie? Covfefe.

Biden's approval rating has never been as low as Trump's highest point.

So sad, little Bobby. Such kindergarten argument. Your juice box went bad and now you've just got sour grapes. Change your soiled panties, dry your cheeks, wipe that snot off your face, and grow the fuck up, buddy.

A stutter/stammer is not an indicator of mental decline, but Trump shows ALL the signs....did you drink your bleach yet? Why not, if Trump wasn't demented to suggest it?

You think Donny had, and still has the cognitive skills to be president, so your opinion is already clearly invalid. Enjoy the next 15 3/4 years, if that's the best you can come up with against Biden and Harris you're in for a long haul of losing.

Winning....big daddy Biden kicking ass and taking names!! Lol.

If you ever get dental work done, pray you don't get dry socket. This is the worst pain I have ever had.

What on earth are you talking about?
Do you believe the government dictates your vows? What "rules"? You just cannot grasp the concept of no fault divorce or prenuptial, can you?

I guess you never planned on kids or shared assets. If you do, not having a marriage means you almost certainly will pay for them for 18+ years but won't have many rights to be in their lives, and may lose your rights to any assets if she grabs first. Uncle Sam is in your relationship, married or not....without a marriage contract, he makes ALL the rules and you have no say.

My brother paid well over a hundred thousand dollars for his divorce in Texas that in my state would have cost under $10K and you congratulate him? You are one strange person.

Again, your perception, not based in fact since the 60's. You assume women take off time to raise the kids and take care of parents and assume fathers don't take paternity leave or have obligations outside work. How 50's. You start from a false position that men work both harder and better, but you have no data to back that up. It certainly hasn't been my experience, I've seen women in the workplace working harder and longer for less pay, sacrificing just like their male counterparts if not more, putting off having families until it's too late while men can have kids long after normal retirement age, putting themselves in dangerous situations where those with power over them have opportunities to abuse that power and abuse those women in ways that rarely happen to men. These aren't exceptions, they're the norm.

Um...so since you admit many women outearn men and the trend reinforces that, meaning soon women in most catagories will out earn men and have more to lose, you admit you're wrong in your position now, right? Of course not, I expect you will still start from a point that hasn't been correct since the era and sexual revolution, early 70's at latest.

No, many of the studies I've seen compared people in the same exact positions in the same industries, even same companies, and women consistently get paid less for the exact same job and hours, and women rarely work less today, and just as often out work their male counterparts knowing they are often token hires not valued by the bosses so have less job security. If I recall correctly, 80% of job losses due to Covid were women, and the men are getting rehired faster. I think you are thinking of some studies from the 80's that made those assumptions and accusations. Comparing apples to apples, women still get shortchanged and as often as not overworked.

Bullshit. You said you would immediately dismiss any woman who has...
"Long dating history? Too much risk
Tends to have short relationships? Too much risk
Likes attention? Too much risk
Single mother (non-widow)? Too much risk
Any mental issues (depression, bipolar, narcissist, anxiety, etc)? Too much risk
Older (why you still single...)? Too much risk
Likes to party? Too much risk
Drinks? Too much risk"

And again, prenuptial. Do you not know what they are? Specify what you expect and agree, and you walk with exactly what you agreed to, no government rules or split involved. Geez. You speak as if you had never heard of them.

Most divorces may be initiated by the woman (if that's true, I expect it's just another assumption) because their husbands are more likely to break their vows first, but are not willing to pay to end the marriage, including penalties for breaking the marriage contract, and we're too dumb to get a prenuptial (or got one that spells out harsh penalties for cheating). Yes, I am assuming men cheat on their spouses more often than the reverse, because men are wired that way.

You are not more likely than not to face a divorce, because it's unlikely any woman meeting your criteria would give you a second thought, and you need to get married to get divorced.

I bet if you show your significant other this thread your 20 year relationship will be in big trouble, or at best enter a long dry dark spell. Women don't like men that believe wholeheartedly that all women are just lessers, leeches that take more than they deserve or even could give back and destroy you whenever they think it serves them. It's probably a good thing you aren't married.

Laws and family court aren't as you describe. Maybe when you enter the 21st century you'll recognize that. The rules of your marriage can be whatever you agree to, including the specifics of the split if it ends.

It's a sad thing you can't grasp that a codified, delineated, agreed to partnership is almost always better, more fulfilling, and has many benefits cohabitation lacks.....almost always unless one or both of you are total douchebags.

It bears noting that more people are born here than left, even when you subtract deaths the population is still growing. Note, there's a housing shortage of near 4 million according to them, if California was the failed state they pretend it is, there would be a housing glut.

It also bears noting that with all the "anti business" regulations California remains the fifth largest economy in the world. Note how many billionaires that made their fortunes here are in the exodus crowd, California produces billionaires like a product.

I lost count how many times they mentioned Austin as a main destination, but I know Texans, and especially Austonians, HATE Californians and for decades have complained that Californians have ruined Austin, over regulated everything, and made it nearly uninhabitable. It also bears mention that one reason the state went dark and dry is they privatized their utilities with little oversight and predictably those companies deferred repairs and upkeep. That's pretty bad for business....so is the less skilled and educated workforce.

Don't let these dishonest people fool you, San Francisco is not representative of the state, and using it as a measure of housing costs is as dishonest as can be.

I noticed, most people leaving make under $100000 per year and can expect to make less where ever they go, while most moving here make over $100000 a year and can expect their earnings to rise.

This piece was incredibly biased.

Arson plain and simple. They should be charged with murder 1 for any deaths, and all 8 million in damages....not just the one guy who fired the shot but everyone involved in setting up the firebomb.

They went to a bone dry field of brush to create an explosion in the middle of waist high dead grass without clearing the fuel from the site and without bringing any fire suppression equipment, not even a wet towel, that makes it intentional arson....or a case of being too dumb to be allowed to live.

No reasonable person could NOT foresee that a huge tannerite explosion in a <2% humidity field of fuel would start a fire, and running away without even trying to put it out makes it again 100% intentional.
This moron and his family should just be harvested for organs, it's the closest they could get to actual restitution. This $500 a month nonsense is outrageous. 100% of the family's assets should be forfeited, including houses, cars, pensions, anything of value...and left with < $1500 a month from his salary....a fourth year agent makes an average of $125000 a year plus 64 days of paid time off, family health and life insurance, retirement starting at 50 with full benefits, employer matched savings, pension, etc. $500 a month ($6000 a year) is insulting and not even noticeable to his finances considering his salary, $5000 a month isn't enough, and would still leave him with $65000per year + all those benefits....not to mention whatever his wife brings in. That's absolutely outrageous. I feel like restitution of $100000 a year until it's fully paid off is being generous considering the damage he caused.
Side note, this is the level of intelligence the border control agency accepts. We need an IQ minimum for public servants, I'm pissed one penny of my tax dollars go to pay brain dead slugs like him, and that total morons like him are armed and given authority is asinine.

Reminds me of growing up in Arizona near the Tohono O Odham reservation.

They filled up our entire front yard out to the road and I had to help cut the roots with a shovel so they would dry up and blow away early. Otherwise the rattlesnakes would hang out in them.

Somebody made this. Someone said, "Y'know what the world needs in 2021? A piece of fucking bread falling over." They probably said this because they were stoned. Probably very stoned. Y'know, a stoner with an idea is something to be respected and feared at the same time. Every stoner is McGuyver when it comes to getting stoned. No pipe? We gotta apple. No apple? We gotta Coke can. No Coke can? "Here, kitty kitty kitty!"

People are all, "Yeah, stoners 'n' shit...", but do they know how much effort a stoner will expend to score a dimer on a Saturday night when The Wall starts at the midnights in 30 minutes? Heaven, Earth, heavy rocks, speed limits, moral certitudes -- nothing stands in the way iffin' you're dry when you should be high!

That's some tasty-ass lookin' bread, too. Bet that bitch would be primo with some peanut butter on it. Oh wait, cotton-mouth....uhh, let's go for Welch's Grape Jelly instead. Ohhhyeah, one bite of WGJ and you're back in the second grade where the days were infinite and all you had to do is play, knock out a couple of easy math problems, and not torment the cat too much.

Thank fucking Christ 2020 is over.

The mayor of New York just cut all contracts with Trump.
The multiple contracts the Trump organization has with New York city all include a clause negating the contract if any of the companies leaders commit criminal activity. Treason and sedition and inciting a riot fit that bill, so they have ended all business contracts and will hire other vendors to handle their properties.
It's pretty likely other states will follow suit.
The PGA has cut all ties.
Shopify no longer sells Trump merchandise or products like Ivanka's clothing line.
His banks, Signature and Deutsche bank have both said they will do no new business, but won't walk away from the $340 million he owes them, business loans personally guaranteed by Trump.
Sounds to me like all revenue is drying up just when $700-$1000 million in debts are coming due...Barron is going to need a job flipping burgers, he's only going to inherit debt and hatred.

If only we COULD cancel those 72 million who supported treasonous Trump and his coup. Cancel their citizenship, their government benefits, their air travel, their bank accounts, and their freedom. They are treasonous terrorists, and deserve to be treated as such.

I love coffee so much I could eat the dry chips at the bottom of the pot.

No, Bob. The "antifa is setting wildfires" claim is pure bullshit with zero evidence. I bet Trump is repeating it. The fires in Oregon were started by lightning. Edit: and downed power lines, and dragging trailer chains, ....

The cop who posted that bullshit lie with no evidence whatsoever has been suspended for spreading lies designed to instigate violence.

The fires are started by lightning mostly.

The wildfires are not caused by antifa or spontaneously exploding trees. They are caused by excessive dryness and decades of drought caused by anthropogenic climate change and dry summer thunderstorms that are increasing in number as our climate changes.

One was started by morons doing an explosive baby reveal.....yes, another one.


They are made worse by the criminal mismanagement of federal forest lands, which make up about 57% of the state's forests. Trump likes to blame California government for mismanagement of the forest, but is too ignorant to grasp that California only owns 3% of it's forests, and they're managed far better than the federal lands.

If you watched anything that wasn't pure propaganda, you would know this. Only right wing bat shit crazy propaganda hides those facts and pretends the fires are from liberals....Only fools believe the same people who've lied to them constantly for years.

https://www.npr.org/2020/09/13/912449209/oregon-officials-warn-untrue-antifa-rumors-waste-precious-resources-for-fires

I think I covered that, but to be clear, I think the protesters were TOO reserved and should have USED their guns. He was an active shooter fleeing.
I have no doubt he tried to use that skateboard. I only wish he had connected, it would have saved a life.

The kid deserves torching (metaphorically). He went looking for trouble he could solve with his gun, and made some.

Sounds like Rosenbaum was shot for no reason, in the face. If kid had really thought he was being doused with an accelerant, (and it's hard to believe he mistook an empty bag for one full of gas) firing his gun was moronic as it would likely ignite it.

Yes, fully unbiased media would be nice, but it's gone. Maybe try pbs? They're still pretty good, but dry and boring too.