20 reasons Jesus was a communist, pacifist, tax-and-spend liberal hippie

Just off the top of my head: 

1.  He threw the moneychangers out of the temple and called them theives.  They were just ordinary businessmen in a laissez-faire economy. 

2.  He said, "It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven."

3.  He encouraged people to give everything they could, and promised that god would support everyone in need.  Just like socialism.

[edit]Matthew 19:21
Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."[/edit]

4.  "turn the other cheek"

5. "love thy enemy"

6.  "blessed are the peacemakers"

7. "blessed are the meek"

8. "woe unto ye who are rich"

 9. "forgive our debts, as we forgive our debtors" -- clearly he would favor bailing out poor people with subprime mortgages.

10. "Give us this day our daily bread" -- what a sense of entitlement to demand handouts!!! 

 11. "Every mountain shall be made low, every valley shall be exalted" --although this is actually from Isaiah's prophecy about the messiah, it looks like a metaphor for proletarian revolution

 12.  Some early christians (before 200BC) actually established agricultural communes.

 13. Jesus is soft on crime: anybody who believes in his scapegoat-like sacrifice will be forgiven.

 14. Jesus loves the poor, the prostitutes, the lepers,  etc.   And he gave them free healthcare!  That's not what Ronald Reagan or John McCain would do.

15. Jesus said nothing about or against homosexuality.

 16. "and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy father which is in secret" -- clearly Jesus opposes school prayer.

 17. Jesus performed the "miracle of the loaves and fish" -- divine government handouts for the poor.

 18. "ask and it shall be given to you.  Seek and ye shall find.  Knock and the door shall be opened" -- giving the poor a sense of entitlement

 19.  "Blessed are the merciful"

 20.  "And if any man will sue thee, and take away thy cloak, let him have thy coat also.  And whosoever shall compell thee to go a mile, go with him twain. Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away"   --  He clearly favors caving in to terrorist demands, and giving the poor everything they want.   Pacifist hippie communist!!!

 

So why do people who call themselves "christian conservatives" have nearly opposite views to most of the things in this list? 

jwray says...

It's not a big deal, having a dead guy on your side, but at least I know my political opponents of the christian fundamentalist "god hates fags and lazy poor people" variety are hypocrites.

Sleepyavon says...

Excellent Post!

I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you gave me clothing, I was sick and you took care of me, I was in prison and you visited me. Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord when was it that we did these things for you?' And the king will answer them, 'Truly I tell you, just as you did it to one of the least of these who are members of my family, you did it to me.
Matthew 25: 35-45

How can one pursue Happiness, if he/she is not allowed to be Healthy enough to pursue such?

SortingHat says...

What I don't understand is why do Christians bluntly defend the money system that often kicks them out of their home and become homeless?

Are they afraid God will strike lightning if they say something bad about a rich corporation?

The bible actually had a system called Jubilee where every certain number of years the system will *reset* and people get back what was taken from them as a chance to start over if things got screwed up.

Capitalism lacks any kind of *reset* to give people a second chance.

Listen to Michael Card's song *Jubilee* in which I didn't understand when I was younger so meant nothing to me but now that I understand it I see the flaws in all *systems* that isn't inspired by the true creator.

We need a new kind of *Jubilee* where the (debt) slaves are set free who paid their debts and got their land and home back and their family back if they were sold.

Today's system results in people making poor choices that hurt themselves such as prostitution out of control/drugged out brains where they can't see properly let alone drive.

SortingHat says...

Unfortunately communism is ran by *government* elected leaders that always stay in power and has the same flaws that humans have so that system will also be crap and there will be no incentive to change for the better.

At least with competition at the very basic level you have to change or go bye bye.

Bail outs makes companies think they can continue to get away with bad stuff and in the GM bailout all the money went to the union leaders not even the workers benefited.

SortingHat says...

One last thing. That is why Youtube sucks more and more and people don't do anything about it because Google will just simply buy your company out and just screw it around.

Google has no incentive to change because they have the most profits and awareness in the media and all the other search engines are now *enhanced by Google* though Start Page does not share your private search data it still has the same garbage google has.

Bing now uses Google as I have notice the same results comparing search engines and unless you make your site smart phone ONLY Google's rules say they won't rank you.

zhell says...

except google never forced you to use their products. You are free to boycott it and/or develop a better one (maybe more privacy oriented) if you don't like it.

government always forces you to do what they think is best for you without letting you the freedom to decline.

Jesus was pro-freedom, and he was anti-big-government. His principles are moral ones, and were never intended to be forced onto people. Charity stops being charity when the government forces people to give.

SortingHat said:

One last thing. That is why Youtube sucks more and more and people don't do anything about it because Google will just simply buy your company out and just screw it around.

Google has no incentive to change because they have the most profits and awareness in the media and all the other search engines are now *enhanced by Google* though Start Page does not share your private search data it still has the same garbage google has.

Bing now uses Google as I have notice the same results comparing search engines and unless you make your site smart phone ONLY Google's rules say they won't rank you.

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