Voting Machines Elect One Of Their Own As President

First non-organic president. A first!
residuesays...

"Troubling report released by U.S. dept. of guys who want blowjobs suggests supply may never catch up to demand."

Good thing I know most of the onion news turns out to be wrong or I'd be panicking

11807says...

I'd be so awesome if the Onion released these "news casts" randomly during commercial breaks on TV. It would make for a surreal experience for sure.

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