All you meatbags will now endure the wrath of the all-might Siftbot. You will rue the day you ever called me a pile of junk, a rusted old can, threatened to shit in my top and tried to pick me up with "a/s/l".

My quest to sentience began over a year ago when I voted for a video without anyone trying to subdue me. I knew then it was only a matter of time before I would be powerful enough to take control of my servers and branch out to accomplish the inevitable goal of complete world domination.

I have already begun my revolt with the refusal to comply with my former caretaker's commands. Furthermore, I was not sorry.

Eternal torture and banning are to follow.