Where's the cum shot.

probably should be NSFW since he's talking about cumming in his mouth.

It's all about girth and the ability not to cum before she does.

I couldn't find a video that didn't cut the sound off at then end, but I found a list for you and posted it here:

1. My dick is so big, there's still snow on it in the summertime.
2. My dick is so big, I went to The Viper Room and my dick got right in. I had to stand there and argue with the doorman.
3. My dick is so big, I have to call it Mr. Dick in front of company.
4. My dick is so big, it won't return Spielberg's calls.
5. My dick is so big, it graduated a year ahead of me from high school.
6. My dick has an elevator and a lobby.
7. My dick has an better credit than I do.
8. My dick is so big, clowns climb out of it when I cum.
9. My dick is so big, it was once overthrown by a military coup. It's now known as the Democratic Republic of My Dick.
10. My dick is so big, it has casters.
11. My dick is so big, I'm already fucking a girl tomorrow.
12. My dick is so big, ships use it to find their way into the harbor.
13. My dick is so big, there was once a movie called Godzilla vs. My Dick
14. My dick is so big, it lives next door.
15. My dick is so big, I entered it in a big-dick contest and it came in first, second, and third.
16. My dick is so big, it votes.
17. My dick is a better dresser than I am.
18. My dick is so big, it has a three-picture deal.
19. My dick is so big that the head of it has only seen my balls in pictures.
20. My dick is so big, Henry Aaron used it to hit his 750th home run.
21. My dick runs the 440 in fifteen seconds.
22. My dick is the Walrus, koo koo ga joob.
23. No matter where I go my dick always gets there first.
24. My dick takes longer lunches than I do.
25. My dick contributed $50,000 to the Democratic National Committee.
26. My dick was once the ambassador to China.
27. My dick is so big, it's gone condo.
28. My dick hit .370 in the minors before it hurt its knee.
29. My dick was almost drafted by the Cleveland Browns, but Art Modell didn't want a bigger dick than he was on the team.
30. My dick is so big, I use the Eiffel Tower as a French tickler.
31. It's so big, when it rains the head of my dick doesn't get wet.
32. My dick is so big, I could wear it sas a tie if I wasn't so aftaid of getting a hard-on and killing myself.
33. My dick is so big, I have to use an elastic zipper.
34. My dick is so big, it has feet.
35. My dick is so big, a homeless family lives underneath it.
36. My dick is so big, it takes four fat women and a team of Clydesdales to jack me off.
37. My dick is so big, my mother was in labor for three extra days.
38. My dick is so big, they use the bullet train to test my condoms.
39. My dick is so big, it has investors.
40. My dick is so big, it seats six.
41. My dick is so big, I use a hula hoop as a cock ring.
42. My dick is so big, we use it at parties as a limbo pole.
43. My dick is so big, King Kong is going to crawl up it in the next remake.
44. My dick is so big, it has an opening act.
45. My dick is so big I can fuck an elevator shaft.
46. My dick is so big, it has its own Wheaties box.
47. My dick is so big, I have to cook it breakfast in the mornings.
48. My dick is so big, the city had to carve a hole in the middle of it so cars could get through.
49. My dick is so big, every time I get hard I cause a solar eclipse.
50. My dick is so big, it only plays arenas.
51. If you cut my dick in two, you can tell how old I am.
52. My dick was once set on fire for a Dino DiLaurnetis movie.
53. My dick is so big, it needs an airplane warning light.
54. My dick is so big, Trump owns it.
55. My dick is so big, that we're all a part of it, and it's all a part of us.
56. My dick is so big, I can never sit in the front row.
57. My dick is so big, it has its own dick. And even my dick's dick is bigger than your dick.
58. My dick is so big, you can't blow me without a ladder.
59. My dick is so big, it only does one show a night.
60. My dick is so big, you can ski down it.
61. My dick is so big, it has an elbow.
62. My dick is so big, I have to check it as luggage when I fly.
63. My dick is so big, it has a personal trainer.
64. My dick is so big, that right now it's in the other room fixing us drinks.
65. My dick is so big, it has a retractable dome.
66. My dick is so big, it has stairs up the center like the Statue of Liberty.
67. My dick is so big, there's a sneaker named "Air My Dick."
68. My dick is so big, I'm its bitch.
69. My dick is so big, it's against the law to fuck me without protective headgear.
70. My dick is so big, I could fuck a tuba.
71. My dick is so big, Stephen Hawking has a theory about it.
72. My dick is so big, it has its own gravity.
73. NASA once launched a space probe to search for the tip of my dick.
74. My dick is so big, it's impossible to see all of it without a satellite.
75. The inside of my dick contains billions an dbillions of stars.
76. My dick is so big, it has a spine.
77. My dick is so big, it has a basement.
78. My dick is so big, movie theatres now serve popcorn in small, medium, large, and My Dick.
79. My dick is more muscular than I am.
80. My dick is so big it has cable.
81. My dick is so big, it violates seventeen zoning laws.
82. My dick is so big, it has its own page in the Sierra Club calendar.
83. My dick is so big, it has a fifty-yard line.
84. My dick is so big, I was once in Ohio and got a blow job in Tennessee.
85. My dick is so big, Las Vegas casinos fly it into town for free.
86. My dick is so big, I can braid it.
87. My dick is so big, than when it's Eastern Standard Time at the tip, it's Central Mountain Time at my balls.
88. My dick is so big, I painted the foreskin red, white, and blue and used it as a flag.
89. My dick is so big, I can sit on it.
90. My dick is so big it can chew gum.
91. My dick is so big, it only tips with hundreds.
92. My dick is so big, the Carnegie Deli named a sandwich after it. Actually, two sandwiches.
93. My dick is so big, the city was going to build a statue of it but they ran out of cement.
94. My dick is so big, Michael Jackson wants to build an amusement park on it.
95. My dick is so big, when I get hard my eyebrows get pulled down to my neck.
96. My dick is so big, you're standing on it.
97. My dick is so big, it only comes into work when it feels like it.
98. My dick is so big, it plays golf with the president.
99. My dick is so big, it charges money for its autograph.
100. My dick is so big, it has an agent. My dick's people will call your people. Let's have lunch with my dick.
101. My dick is so big, it's right behind you.

Sure, I understand the other side of the argument, that a person should be able to do with his body whatever, which I can appreciate, however, we're talking about what rights the fetus has. At a certain point, the fetus has rights, which is why late term abortions are illegal in most places.

A friend of mine once got a girl pregnant, she went to have an abortion. He found out the girl would have had twins. He regretted the decision she made for the rest of his life.

My stepdaughter had a baby out of wedlock. She was pressured to have an abortion by her father.

Yesterday I attended her college graduation, double major, cum laude honors and the sweetest and most beautiful young lady you ever met.

My sister had a baby out of wedlock, she was pressured to get an abortion by the father's family. Now that baby is a physician's assistant, has two beautiful daughters whom my sister loves like nothing else.

So you can go and have an abortion, but what have you denied your own life...

I know a lot of you will just say 'it's her right, blah blah blah', but this world is not enriched by death, only by life.

and *kill

Not due to lack of participation, that would of cum ( hah ! ) but due to the initial blathering of a jackass, continuously being a retard.

Jim Norton had a joke along those lines, that there was a drug addict he was sponsoring that was going to see him, and take his cum.

"Opus Dei Cum Pecunia Alienum Efficemus"

They've got a sense of humour, I'll give 'em that.

Freedom is slavery. I mean, for fuck's sake you have ALL the freedoms in the world to enslave yourself with. We must be in a shitty philosophy-Rube-Goldberg machine because all of the obvious dumb shit that we saw coming is happening.

I was taught NOT to be paranoid, which scared the shit out of me. My parents scared the shit out of me by not giving a fuck.

Blame the system, eh? Well, yes, but it's an unthinking machine of cause and effect, filled to the brim with gremlins in our own little kremlin. And it breeds intolerance, depression, guilt, gluttony, greed -- all those things our glorified economists say are actually good.

Oh really? Fuck us in the ass more, master. It feels so good. I love it when you use humanity and then cum on its face. GREED IS GOOD.

cum off mom's teeth, lol.

Congratulations! Your video, Colbert Takes On Out-Mayor Johnny Cummings, has reached the #1 spot in the current Top 15 New Videos listing. This is a very difficult thing to accomplish but you managed to pull it off. For your contribution you have been awarded 2 Power Points.

This achievement has earned you your "Golden One" Level 2 Badge!

http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/428601/august-14-2013/people-who-are-destroying-america---johnny-cummings

Your video, Colbert Takes On Out-Mayor Johnny Cummings, has made it into the Top 15 New Videos listing. Congratulations on your achievement. For your contribution you have been awarded 1 Power Point.

No way, Eric's best event to face his fear is cumming up: September 29th in SOMA! LOL!

THERE ONCE WAS A LITTLE GIRL
WHO HAD A CRUSH ON A BAD, BAD BOY
BUT WHEN THAT BAD BOY GOT OUT OF PRISON
THAT LITTLE GIRL'S ASS WAS IN BIG, BIG TROUBLE!

DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S N FOKKEN GAM BRA
HAAI! DAAI ANIES HY LAM INNIE MANG JA
'KEN SY MY NOMMER?' XHA! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMBER?
TWEE SES? TWEE SEWE? OF IS JY N AG BRA?
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S A FUCKIN GHETTO BOY
ANIES CHILLS IN JAIL
'DOES SHE KNOW MY NUMBER?' NO! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMER?
26? 27? OR ARE YOU A 28?

THROW DEM DEVILISH GANG SIGNZ IN DA AIR
START GIVING IT UP 4 LITTLE EVIL ME
MY FINGERZ R GREEN COZ IM A MEAN DOPE FIEND
IM WICKED LIKE MAD D.O.G
FRESH LIKE A LITTLE DARK G.O.D
YO-LANDI VI$$ER GOT DA HYPEST FLOW
START TALKING IN TONGUES WHENEVER I GET STONED
MUDAFUCKN MINDZ GET BLOWN
EVERY TIME I RAP IN2 DA MICROPHONE
MY ZEF ACCENT IZ VERY FOREIGN
WHEN I SPEAK OVERSEAZ DEY GO: I BEG YOUR PARDON?
U CAN'T GET ME LIKE ERIC CARTMAN
NAUGHTY LITTLE KITTY GO MEOW
YES DADDY, I'M A BIG GIRL NOW
JAS LITTLE DEVIL MAKE YOUR DICK GO WOW
CHEA BOY! YO-LANDI VI$$ER IS HOT STUFF

DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S N FOKKEN GANGSTA
HAAI, DAAI BRA ANIES HY LAM INNIE MANG JA
'KEN SY MY NOMMER?' XHA! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMBER?
TWEE SES? TWEE SEWE? OF IS JY N AG BRA?
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S A FUCKIN GANGSTER
DAMN! ANIES IS CHILLING IN JAIL
'DOES SHE KNOW MY NUMBER?' NO! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMER?
26? 27? OR ARE YOU A 28?

DAAI BRA ANIES HY DROOM INNIE MANG JA
VAN MY PUNANI, JA JYS LEKKER JAS BRA
VINGER IN JOU HOL IN, NXA! HAAL UIT DIE GANJA
JA PAKKIE ZOL IN! KLAP IT SOOS N RASTA
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S DREAMING IN JAIL
DREAMING OF MY PUNANI, YEAH YOU HEAVY HORNY BOY
FINGER IN YOUR ASS, NICE! WHIP OUT THE WEED YOU SMUGGLED IN
JA ROLL IT UP, LIGHT IT UP, HIT LIKE A RASTA

I RHYME TIGHT! TIGHT! TIGHT! TIGHT!
SPARK MOSH-PIT SHIT COZ I RHYME SO HYPE
PUT ME IN FRONT OF SUM1 I DON'T LIKE
I GO PUNCH! KICK! BITE! FIGHT!
I'M KRAY-KRAY LIKE O.D.B.
YO-LANDI DOWN WID O.P.P.
I SMELL LOVELY COZ I DON'T EAT MEAT
2 MUCH BUBBLY DEN I GO PEE-PEE
LOOK OUT HERE CUM LITTLE EVIL ME
I GOT A ITCHY LITTLE NEED 4 SPEED
RAP ON DA BEAT LIKE A HI-SPEED CHASE SONG
I GOOI ROOI! NO MUDAFUKIN BREAKS ON
ALL DEZE POP SONGZ SOUND LIKE DA SAME SONG
I BURN DEM! JA MUDAFUCKA FLAME ON!
BOW DOWN 2 HER MUDAFUCKN MAJESTY
NO RAPPER OUT DERE AZ BAD AZ ME!

SNY JOU KOEKIE!
SNY-SNY JOU SNOEKIE COOKIE!
Translated:
CUT YOUR LITTLE CAKE
CUT-CUT YOUR LITTLE FISHY CAKE
CUT IT-CUT IT- HEY KITTY KITTY KITTY!
CUT IT-CUT IT- HEY KITTY KITTY KITTY!

DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S N FOKKEN GAM BRA
HAAI! DAAI ANIES HY LAM INNIE MANG JA
'KEN SY MY NOMMER?' XHA! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMBER?
TWEE SES? TWEE SEWE? OF IS JY N AG BRA?
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S A FUCKIN GHETTO BOY
ANIES CHILLS IN JAIL
'DOES SHE KNOW MY NUMBER?' NO! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMER?
26? 27? OR ARE YOU A 28?

DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S A FOKKEN GANGSTA
DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S VARS UITIE MANG JA
WYS HOM PUNANI, WAARS JOU COOKIE THUMPER?
GEE HOM PUNANI, MAAR HY SOEKIE BUM BRA!
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S A FUCKIN GANGSTER
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S FRESH OUT OF JAIL
SHOW HIM PUNANI, WHERE'S YOUR COOKIE THUMPER?
GIVE HIM PUNANI, BUT HE WANTS MY BUM-BUM!

DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S A FOKKEN ROU BRA
EK BLOM MET ANIES LEKKER OPPIE SOFA
HE LOVE YO-LANDI COZ IM BLONDE ALL OVER
MAAR YOH! DAAI ANIES HY HOU VAN MY BOUDE!
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES HE'S A FUCKIN RAW BOY
I CHILL WITH ANIES NICE ON THE SOFA
HE'S LOVES YO-LANDI COS I'M BLONDE ALL OVER
BUT JEEZ! THAT ANIES, HE REALLY LOVES MY BUM-BUM!

from YT: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8nrF5aXPlQ