Kitty's got a good right, but damn, that left hook is deadly!

It was April the forty-first
Being a quadruple leap year
I was driving in downtown Atlantis
My barracuda was in the shop
So I was in a rented stingray
And it was overheating

So I pulled into a Shell Station
They said I'd blown a seal
I said, "Fix the damn thing
And leave my private life out of it
Okay pal?"

While they were doing that
I walked over to a place called the Oyster Bar, a real dive
But I knew the owner
He used to play for the Dolphins
I said "Hi Gil"
You have to yell, he's hard of herring

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream

Gil was also down on his luck
Fact is he was barely keeping his head below water
I bellied up to the sandbar
He poured me the usual

Rusty snail, hold the grunion
Shaken not stirred
With a peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich on the side
Heavy on the mako

I slipped him a fin
On porpoise
I was feeling good
I even dropped a sand dollar in the box for Jerry's squids
For the halibut

Well the place was crowded
We were packed in like sardines They were all there to listen to the big band sounds of Tommy Dorsal
What sole

Tommy was rockin' the place with a very popular tuna
Salmon Chanted Evening
And the stage was surrounded by screaming groupers
Probably there to see the bass player

One of them was this cute little yellowtail
And she's giving me the eye
So I figured this is my chance for a little fun
You know, piece of Pisces

But she said things I just couldn't fathom
She was too deep, seemed to be under a lot of pressure
Boy, could she drink
She drank like a . . .
She drank a lot

I said "What's your sign"
She said "Aquarium"
I said "Great, let's get tanked"

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream

I invited her to my place for a midnight bait
I said "Come on baby, it'll only take a few minnows"
She threw me that same old line
"Not tonight, I gotta haddock"

And she wasn't kidding either
Cause in came the biggest, meanest looking haddock
I'd ever seen come down the pike
He was covered with mussels

He came over to me and said
"Listen, shrimp, don't you come trollin' around here"
What a crab
This guy was steamed
I could see the anchor in his eyes

I turned to him, I said
"A-balone, you're just being shellfish"
Well, I knew it was going to be trouble and so did Gil
'Cause he was already on the phone to the cods

The haddock hits me with a sucker punch
I catch him with a left hook
He eels over
It was a fluke but there he was
Lying on the deck, flat as a mackerel
Kelpless

I said "Forget the cods Gil
This guy's gonna need a sturgeon"
Well, the yellowtail was impressed with the way I landed her boyfriend
She came over to me, she said
"Hey, big boy, you're really a game fish
What's your name"
I said "Marlin"

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh
Wet dream

Well, from then on we had a whale of a time
I took her to dinner, I took her to dance
I bought her a bouquet of flounders
And then I went home with her
And what did I get for my trouble
A case of the clams

Think I had a wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh

Wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh

Wet dream
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream
Ooh Ooh Ooh Ooh

Clerk wasn't exactly a small man either (unlike the robber), that left hook has some mass behind it!

What do you guys think? Southpaw or just a good left hook?

Thanks for your thoughts, Nordlich . That was a very interesting exploration of the issue.

In reply to this comment by NordlichReiter:
In reply to this comment by chilaxe:
Hey Nordlich, that reminds me I wanted to ask you since I know you have a lot of martial arts experience...

In the event of an unavoidable fight, what do you think about striking someone in the neck instead of the skull? The advantages might be 1. less likely to injure your hand or arm and 2. the fight ends more quickly.

What's your take on it?

In reply to this comment by NordlichReiter:
>> ^FancyL:
It seems to me that computers could pretty easily take the job of an umpire by now. It'd be much harder to argue with a computer/robo-ump.


If you do the robo-ump could beat the bloody shit out of you!

I'm assuming the assailant is ambiguous, where a nut shot isn't viable (baggy pants, or whatever). The neck is a good target for shocking the assailant giving the victim enough time to flee, or followup. I'm not a fan of knife hand because of the 5th metacarpal being a small bone but it is effective at striking the arteries*. A closed hammer first is good for causing more blunt damage to the neck it is also good. I think that the closed fist would cause more damage with the amount of force involved, to the throat itself. These are all coming from the side striking the arteries of the neck.

Front on strikes seem to be more fatal. But they are very effective much more so than any of the side strikes, I think. I feel that the force required to cause an assailant to quit is less. An interesting thing about getting hit in the front of the throat is that it feels very disturbing. After getting hit in the throat (the person didn't intend to hit me) it feels like there is a lump inside the throat. It felt like that for 2 days, this was caused by the swelling. It doesn't take a very hard hit to cause that, sensation(citation 2).

I did some quick research on Tracheobronchial Injury (wikipedia) and from the tone of the article it seemed that high impact causes massive trauma. However other sites seem to suggest it would be rather easy to cause massive trauma.

Here's what I really think, and it mirrors the answer given by the guy in the yahoo link. If the assailant is not expecting the throat strike it can be very effective (This kind of strike is the one that you always want, like the unexpected left hook.) It seems that since they aren't expecting it then they are ill prepared to be struck meaning less force can be used, but accuracy is paramount. If they are ready to be struck then, I would assume, that the assailant and victim are already throwing. At which point any hard strike to the neck area will be very effective(citation 3).

I have to agree and say; I really think that any strike to the neck area, especially the anterior neck is going to cause enough damage to make the assailant quit. However it can be lethal, as you probably already know. It seems to me that accuracy is more important than power in this kind of situation, aim small miss small (citation 4).


1. http://linkinghub.elsevier.com/retrieve/pii/S1479666X06800909
2. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dysphagia
3. http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090531080328AALIIO9
4. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0187393/trivia

*If the person using the technique is a long time veteran of Karate Do (traditional) and have done body hardening the technique can be deadly. Then again the person could get lucky, and strike just right.

In reply to this comment by chilaxe:
Hey Nordlich, that reminds me I wanted to ask you since I know you have a lot of martial arts experience...

In the event of an unavoidable fight, what do you think about striking someone in the neck instead of the skull? The advantages might be 1. less likely to injure your hand or arm and 2. the fight ends more quickly.

What's your take on it?

In reply to this comment by NordlichReiter:
>> ^FancyL:
It seems to me that computers could pretty easily take the job of an umpire by now. It'd be much harder to argue with a computer/robo-ump.


If you do the robo-ump could beat the bloody shit out of you!

I'm assuming the assailant is ambiguous, where a nut shot isn't viable (baggy pants, or whatever). The neck is a good target for shocking the assailant giving the victim enough time to flee, or followup. I'm not a fan of knife hand because of the 5th metacarpal being a small bone but it is effective at striking the arteries*. A closed hammer first is good for causing more blunt damage to the neck it is also good. I think that the closed fist would cause more damage with the amount of force involved, to the throat itself. These are all coming from the side striking the arteries of the neck.

Front on strikes seem to be more fatal. But they are very effective much more so than any of the side strikes, I think. I feel that the force required to cause an assailant to quit is less. An interesting thing about getting hit in the front of the throat is that it feels very disturbing. After getting hit in the throat (the person didn't intend to hit me) it feels like there is a lump inside the throat. It felt like that for 2 days, this was caused by the swelling. It doesn't take a very hard hit to cause that, sensation(citation 2).

I did some quick research on Tracheobronchial Injury (wikipedia) and from the tone of the article it seemed that high impact causes massive trauma. However other sites seem to suggest it would be rather easy to cause massive trauma.

Here's what I really think, and it mirrors the answer given by the guy in the yahoo link. If the assailant is not expecting the throat strike it can be very effective (This kind of strike is the one that you always want, like the unexpected left hook.) It seems that since they aren't expecting it then they are ill prepared to be struck meaning less force can be used, but accuracy is paramount. If they are ready to be struck then, I would assume, that the assailant and victim are already throwing. At which point any hard strike to the neck area will be very effective(citation 3).

I have to agree and say; I really think that any strike to the neck area, especially the anterior neck is going to cause enough damage to make the assailant quit. However it can be lethal, as you probably already know. It seems to me that accuracy is more important than power in this kind of situation, aim small miss small (citation 4).


1. http://linkinghub.elsevier.com/retrieve/pii/S1479666X06800909
2. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dysphagia
3. http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090531080328AALIIO9
4. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0187393/trivia

*If the person using the technique is a long time veteran of Karate Do (traditional) and have done body hardening the technique can be deadly. Then again the person could get lucky, and strike just right.

Yeah, that's a killer left hook.

Tags for this video have been changed from 'David Tua, The Terminator, Knockout, boxing, WBO' to 'David Tua, The Terminator, Knockout, boxing, WBO, left hook' - edited by MrFisk

^I have no problem being skeptical of the chi KO depicted in the link above, but the chop KO actually makes sense. I've seen how fast you can choke someone out if done correctly, and I wouldn't be surprised if the trauma of the chop combined with the brief interruption of blood flow had an effect.

I'm not willing to let someone chop me in the neck though. Those students are morons.

BTW, a chop or hammer-fist to the side of the jaw will drop someone as fast as a left hook:
http://www.videosift.com/video/Pimp-receives-a-smackdown

That left hook to Anne Coulter is just comedy gold!

sounds like a left hook to me! :-D

First off our good old boy Obama shot himself in the foot pretty hard by not going to see those troops cameras or not.

Anecdote: We know why they didn't allow him to take cameras Because those injured troops are from Iraq and thats not good for war bonds.

We all knew that McCain would use this to his advantage, because its too hard to pass up a good left hook below the belt.

Obama made a tactical error on this one, he should have went to see the troops. To Obama it could be like taking his in laws to dinner, but sometimes he needs to do it.

Looks like he's taken one too many left hooks.

I was speaking mostly of strategy. In a fight 2 minutes seems like 20. You have to be thinking faster then your opponent acts. I was talking about confidence but physical prowess can't compete with an opponent who knows your moves split seconds before you make them. I say it's mental because you have to be constantly weighing your opponents moves and your counter movements.

By strategy, do you mean tactics? I'm definitely in agreement with you that you need to be constantly checking your actions to your opponent's, but I disagreed with you because you said that most fights happen in your mind before a punch or kick is thrown. I was only disagreeing with that, because you can't adjust tactics until you're actually fighting. In other words, there's a difference between an opponent who knows your moves seconds before you throw them (because you're telegraphing movement), and an opponent who knows your moves before you even start the fight (which is, I hold, impossible). No amount of thinking before a fight will tell you that he is developing a welt on his right-side ribs so you need to feint right, slip left and pound with your left hook that much harder. Mental state and strategy can be determined before a fight. Tactics and techniques, the kind of things you're talking about when you're adjusting your moves to his, cannot.

Cheers to the only person to hit the nail, with their remarks....amazing how film can eliminate so much bullshit-
Here's to a equitable, sensible sifter-

In reply to your comment:
“The tigger uses a arm lock on the kids elbow, most untrained people do not know how to do that, if the tigger had wrestling or something like that in highschool then his training stuck with him.

Now at first i thought that the tigger was locking the arm on purpose to strike the kid, his lock was pretty good.

But i look again and i see the kid seems to have a smirk, and the kids first hit the tigger aswell.

Score one for tigger superb use of the an arm elbow manipulation, and possibly blind left hook!”y