I don't want "The frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex" to become our president.

I don't want "The frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex." to be our president

The kitchen area is awfully close to the toilet, is it sanitary with fecal matter floating about in the air?

@bobknight33 I discarded it because my queue was full and I wanted to submit something else, and clearly that video wasn't gonna sift.

All you really did was smear your usual fecal matter over the comment section.

I find it somewhat amusing that these people with, what I would view, not real skills make so much. I mean news caster do nothing more than read the news...or well, they did years ago before they were celebrities that sell news instead of report it. The tax code is a piece of crap anyway, this debate is just about one morsole of fecal matter.

Number of pages in Federal Tax code.

I can't find a more recent list of how many pages there are. It is sad, and wasteful, that not only do we have to pay a mammoth IRS to keep track of all that, but, entire industries have sprung up to do you taxes for you. Money you could be spending on better schools, better toothbrushes, ect. One might say, "but you are creating jobs for accountants!" But that is the same as saying it is good for the economy for the government to go around smashing windows is good for window repairmen. Fact is, you shouldn't need to spend money to have some firm write software to sort through millions of lines of federal tax statues. Make it flat, make it easier, make it fair...but for heavens sakes, make it something else.

</rant>

Jeeeeex....by decreee i'm already here. i have always been here as a chunk of consciousness and an ever-flowing diatribe of fecal matter. i discard your viddys and your minds and refine them

i love you all

always have, always will.... pardon me, i need to go back into character

dingleberry

A smallish, semi-dry, extraordinarily tenacious remnant of fecal matter which, when unwittingly rolled into a mixture with toilet paper lint by the action of wiping, becomes almost irremovably entangled among ones anal hair, a situationality exacerbated by the vigorous chafing and friction between the buttocks and most commonly remedied by the sad and almost entirely unavoidable remedy of plucking out at its root the individual hair to which each dingleberry is conjoined. Of related interest, dingleberries are often noted as having the vague odor of undigested corn or peanuts. -Urban Dictionary

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^

That and wanting to minimize the amount of pubic hairs and fecal matter on all of our chairs. But mostly the thing you said.

Tags for this video have been changed from 'tags withheld' to 'ending, last, spoiler, god did it, frak, angels, fecal matter' - edited by gwiz665

The Onion

OPINION
This New Toilet Paper Is So Soft And Absorbent!

By Ted Roman
Amazed Customer
May 3, 2000 | Issue 36•16

You probably won't believe me when I tell you that new Cushy™-brand bathroom tissue is the softest, most absorbent bathroom tissue you'll ever try. Heck, I was skeptical at first, too! Even after learning about Cushy's™ specially quilted "Moistu-Weave" inlay, I still thought, "Come on! How much better could one bathroom tissue be than another?" But once you've felt for yourself the heavenly sensation of a folded-up wad of Cushy™ sliding across your excrement-smeared anus, you're sure to agree: Cushy™ is the most luxurious tissue you'll ever wipe your ass with!

Wow! When it comes to getting your rectal opening clean as a whistle, removing every last trace of stinking, disgusting fecal matter from the puckered surface of the human anus, Cushy™ just can't be beat! Its patented, three-ply "Feces-Grabbing Action" has been specially designed by scientists to wipe away 30 percent more human dung from the anal region than the leading brand–even in those problem "hairy" areas where tiny balls of shit can get trapped for days! When it comes to making sure my asshole's been wiped right, I trust Cushy™. As the commercial says, "With Cushy™, I Know My Ass Is Clean!®"

And Cushy™ is more than just the most absorbent product ever designed, manufactured, and marketed for the purpose of wiping human waste from the rectal region; it's also the softest. I can't believe how good it feels pressed up against my asshole! Sure, I thought the leading brand was good, but after trying Cushy™, I could scarcely believe the difference! Compared to the sumptuous comfort of Cushy™, the leading brand feels like a portable electric belt-sander grinding my ass down to a chafed and bloody pulp! Wiping with Cushy™, on the other hand, feels as if the defecation residue between my legs is being spirited away on the back of a pillowy-soft cartoon cloud! It's enough to make a person open up a window and shout to the world, "Shit, I Love This Ass-Paper!®"

Cushy™ goes the extra mile to make sure my anus feels pampered like a dainty princess. That's because Cushy™'s not just about getting your ass free of shit particles. It's about treating your entire backside to a feeling of cushiony goodness. It's what the good folks at Global Tetrahedron Forestries, manufacturers of Cushy™, like to call "T.A.C."–Total Asshole Comfort.™ Doesn't your asshole deserve a little T.A.C.?

Your anal region, from your ass cheeks to your dilated sphincter to the interior of your anal column itself, works hard for you each day. Isn't it time you gave a little something back? With Cushy™, my asshole feels as if it's being gently wafted skyward on a freshly scented summer breeze! Try getting that level of comfort from those bargain brands!

Do the other brands offer patented three-ply quilted comfort? Are they lightly perfumed and softened with soothing aloe-based moisturizing lotions? Do they offer Cushy™'s exclusive "Complete Asshole Guarantee®"? Of course not. Whether you've got a thin, runny liquid, a huge, bulky chunk, or even one of those hard-to-wipe, viscous-sludge-type defecations, Cushy™ not only has the absorbency needed to wipe your ass completely free of sticky, after-shit smears and stains; it's gentle enough to make your puckered butthole feel like the King of Siam, reclining on a mound of the finest silk pillows in all of Asia.

Sure, Cushy™ costs a bit more than less ass-pampering brands, but my ass is worth it! Cushy™ is so soft, sometimes I want to take a shit even when I don't have to! Once you've seen for yourself how wonderful, how majestic, how truly awe-inspiring this new bathroom tissue is, you'll know why people say, "Cushy™... You're Gonna Shit Your Pants!©"

What does this video have to do with fecal matter, though?

I'm surprised the years of semen and fecal matter haven't ruined those pictures.

Just imagine how much Marty McFly would have paid for a 266Mhz laptop in 1985! Back...to the future!

And to think all along I just thought you were some kind of sick pervert, but it turns out you're just slow. In that case I'll give you the heads up on all that A$$ GR@V33 you've been playing with. It's actually frothy mixture of 'personal' lubricant and fecal matter that's generated as a byproduct of anal sex. It is sometimes referred to as Santorum, in honor Senator Rick Santorum, once an evangelical senator from Pennsylvania. So now you know and knowing is half the battle!