Verse 1:
Hey there Keanu
It's about time that someone said it
But your picture makes us feel sad
God I hope that you read Reddit
Yes I do
Cause all my posts are just for you
I swear it's true

Verse 2:
Hey there Keanu
Don't you worry about the pigeons
Have your lunch alone in sorrow
Boy that sandwich looks delicious
Close your eyes
Pictures of you are no surprise
This karma's nice

Chorus:
Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's Reddit sympathy
'Whoa' is what you say to me
'Whoa' is what you say to me
It's what you say to me

Verse 3:
Hey there Keanu
I know times have been real hard
But with some upvotes from my friends
We'll steer that bus between the cars
We'll have it good
You know kung fu it's understood
I just got wood

Verse 4:
Hey there Keanu
My photoshop skills have no limits
If all the shops with cats I did of you
Would help to lift your spirits
I'd shop it all
I'd even shop you with Ron Paul
That park's too small

Chorus:
Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's Reddit sympathy
'Whoa' is what you say to me
'Whoa' is what you say to me
It's what you say to me

Bridge:
You give so much with all your heart
Some motorbikes just for a start
But I'd work with you for very little pay
We don't need to stop this bus
There is no spoon what's all the fuss
And Mountain breeze is such a trippy name
Keanu I can promise you
That by the time we get through
The Reddit memes will never ever be the same
And you're to blame

Verse 5:
Hey there Keanu
Eat your lunch and don't you miss me
One more week and we'll be done with you
Please don't think that we're unhappy but it's true
Circlejerk won't know what's left to do
I can't imagine someone new
Hey there Keanu here's to you
This one's for you

Chorus:
Oh it's what you do to me
Oh it's Reddit sympathy
'Whoa' is what you say to me
'Whoa' is what you say to me
It's what you say to me

I was going to post this, but thought, 'there's no way in hell that this will ever get sifted.' I guess I underestimate the average sifters sense of humor and the healing power of Keanu....

Upvote for "International Cheer Up Keanu Reeves Day!"

http://www.time.com/time/arts/article/0,8599,1996460,00.html

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/kindness/post/2010/06/cheer-up-keanu-day-mobilizes-outpouring-of-kindness-on-actors-behalf/1

There was a Facebook page but the official one is gone as it was an event for the 15th iirc...

*edit
Here is the Facebook page for people who simply like him.
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Keanu-Reeves/112970858717346

Upvote for sad Keanu riding a dolphin @1:17

He is Immortal. Best leave him alone. Also, @Keanu_Reeves appears to be a member of the sift.

Look at the comments on that page. Someone is 4.PROFITING!

>> ^Keanu_Reeves:

Woah

*quality

Boosting this quality contribution up in the Hot Listing - declared quality by gwiz665.

i still prefer the cthulhu version
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XxScTbIUvoA