Yay!! We're in MY WORLD right now! HIPAA is the reason I get paid what I do, but the real nuts on my sundae is THIS little motherfucker:

https://www.techtarget.com/searchsecurity/definition/Federal-Information-Security-Management-Act

You don't even remotely understand how esoteric and convoluted this goddamn thing is, and how hard your pee-pee will get whacked if you fuck up implementing it. I have to do audits against this shit. There's THOUSANDS of questions and the auditors will not tell you the criteria for passing. I've had audits come back that looked like a 2nd grader submitting her paper, "Frogs are neat!" to the Harvard Review Board and yet passed, and I've had audits with two ultra-specialized misses on them that got the whole audit disqualified. I spend more time on documentation -- and the endless, ENDLESS paperwork that comes along with that shit -- than actually doing the technical stuff.

tl;dr: I like turtles.

me: *checks submitter*
submitter: 🤥
me: 😀 pee pee poo poo time for lil bowb boy! 🤭

Still hilarious, although I think the Germans would be the last folks to make fun of pee-pee tapes.

I just don't think that Russians are going to require passports in Trump's Authoritarian Dictatorship.

I'm expecting an official Russian enclave in the US. Maybe just cede Virginia to them. Or any State they want really. Anything to keep the pee pee tapes and free loans under wraps.

*promote tits and bits at the pee pee party

The council member who left, went to take a piss.

Everyone in the chamber could hear him relieving himself.

Teehee. He went pee-pee.

Look People.

Quite frankly, that comment from dag with that fucked-up, 'where-in-the-fuck-from-as-far-left-field-as-possible-did-THAT-come-from tone, timbre, pitch, and timing????? IS, in all my infamy here, about as close as it gets to me never coming back here to play again and telling this place to fuck completely off.
Just so all you who know or care and could give a fuck.....RIGHT?!

Someone, ANYONE, tell me why I should even fucking bother?

Because, looky....I KNOW you motherfuckers, all of you that play here nice or otherwise, need people like me, like....ME-

NOW. Everyone say that last sentence above to yourselves aloud, replacing the words 'you' and 'me' with the words "me' or 'you', and you begin to see how fucking insane you are all to you.

Ok now, @SDGundamX (you glorious fucker)

Agreed. You now have the esteemed privilege and honor to hold the leash and take me out for my pee-pees and poo-poos.

I will make no pot-stirring promises as to the emotional viability or culpability of certain users here, especially not of that of my own-self, as I cherish both pot and the stirring of pots.

"Oh I, I'm so sohhry. This all-eh my fault. I should've-a shut my water park-a down when it reached-a ninety percent-a pee!"

I'm sorry....Who goes to a place like this and calls, "fun?" Aren't there some inland lakes or ponds in the provinces somewhere you can reach by bullet-train er sumpthin'? How about, save up yer train-fare for a day at the coast?? Thenna you donna-always a-still gotta be-a thinkin' about-a the pee-pee, si??

THERE ONCE WAS A LITTLE GIRL
WHO HAD A CRUSH ON A BAD, BAD BOY
BUT WHEN THAT BAD BOY GOT OUT OF PRISON
THAT LITTLE GIRL'S ASS WAS IN BIG, BIG TROUBLE!

DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S N FOKKEN GAM BRA
HAAI! DAAI ANIES HY LAM INNIE MANG JA
'KEN SY MY NOMMER?' XHA! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMBER?
TWEE SES? TWEE SEWE? OF IS JY N AG BRA?
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S A FUCKIN GHETTO BOY
ANIES CHILLS IN JAIL
'DOES SHE KNOW MY NUMBER?' NO! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMER?
26? 27? OR ARE YOU A 28?

THROW DEM DEVILISH GANG SIGNZ IN DA AIR
START GIVING IT UP 4 LITTLE EVIL ME
MY FINGERZ R GREEN COZ IM A MEAN DOPE FIEND
IM WICKED LIKE MAD D.O.G
FRESH LIKE A LITTLE DARK G.O.D
YO-LANDI VI$$ER GOT DA HYPEST FLOW
START TALKING IN TONGUES WHENEVER I GET STONED
MUDAFUCKN MINDZ GET BLOWN
EVERY TIME I RAP IN2 DA MICROPHONE
MY ZEF ACCENT IZ VERY FOREIGN
WHEN I SPEAK OVERSEAZ DEY GO: I BEG YOUR PARDON?
U CAN'T GET ME LIKE ERIC CARTMAN
NAUGHTY LITTLE KITTY GO MEOW
YES DADDY, I'M A BIG GIRL NOW
JAS LITTLE DEVIL MAKE YOUR DICK GO WOW
CHEA BOY! YO-LANDI VI$$ER IS HOT STUFF

DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S N FOKKEN GANGSTA
HAAI, DAAI BRA ANIES HY LAM INNIE MANG JA
'KEN SY MY NOMMER?' XHA! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMBER?
TWEE SES? TWEE SEWE? OF IS JY N AG BRA?
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S A FUCKIN GANGSTER
DAMN! ANIES IS CHILLING IN JAIL
'DOES SHE KNOW MY NUMBER?' NO! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMER?
26? 27? OR ARE YOU A 28?

DAAI BRA ANIES HY DROOM INNIE MANG JA
VAN MY PUNANI, JA JYS LEKKER JAS BRA
VINGER IN JOU HOL IN, NXA! HAAL UIT DIE GANJA
JA PAKKIE ZOL IN! KLAP IT SOOS N RASTA
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S DREAMING IN JAIL
DREAMING OF MY PUNANI, YEAH YOU HEAVY HORNY BOY
FINGER IN YOUR ASS, NICE! WHIP OUT THE WEED YOU SMUGGLED IN
JA ROLL IT UP, LIGHT IT UP, HIT LIKE A RASTA

I RHYME TIGHT! TIGHT! TIGHT! TIGHT!
SPARK MOSH-PIT SHIT COZ I RHYME SO HYPE
PUT ME IN FRONT OF SUM1 I DON'T LIKE
I GO PUNCH! KICK! BITE! FIGHT!
I'M KRAY-KRAY LIKE O.D.B.
YO-LANDI DOWN WID O.P.P.
I SMELL LOVELY COZ I DON'T EAT MEAT
2 MUCH BUBBLY DEN I GO PEE-PEE
LOOK OUT HERE CUM LITTLE EVIL ME
I GOT A ITCHY LITTLE NEED 4 SPEED
RAP ON DA BEAT LIKE A HI-SPEED CHASE SONG
I GOOI ROOI! NO MUDAFUKIN BREAKS ON
ALL DEZE POP SONGZ SOUND LIKE DA SAME SONG
I BURN DEM! JA MUDAFUCKA FLAME ON!
BOW DOWN 2 HER MUDAFUCKN MAJESTY
NO RAPPER OUT DERE AZ BAD AZ ME!

SNY JOU KOEKIE!
SNY-SNY JOU SNOEKIE COOKIE!
Translated:
CUT YOUR LITTLE CAKE
CUT-CUT YOUR LITTLE FISHY CAKE
CUT IT-CUT IT- HEY KITTY KITTY KITTY!
CUT IT-CUT IT- HEY KITTY KITTY KITTY!

DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S N FOKKEN GAM BRA
HAAI! DAAI ANIES HY LAM INNIE MANG JA
'KEN SY MY NOMMER?' XHA! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMBER?
TWEE SES? TWEE SEWE? OF IS JY N AG BRA?
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S A FUCKIN GHETTO BOY
ANIES CHILLS IN JAIL
'DOES SHE KNOW MY NUMBER?' NO! BOY WHAT'S YOUR NUMER?
26? 27? OR ARE YOU A 28?

DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S A FOKKEN GANGSTA
DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S VARS UITIE MANG JA
WYS HOM PUNANI, WAARS JOU COOKIE THUMPER?
GEE HOM PUNANI, MAAR HY SOEKIE BUM BRA!
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S A FUCKIN GANGSTER
THAT BOY ANIES, HE'S FRESH OUT OF JAIL
SHOW HIM PUNANI, WHERE'S YOUR COOKIE THUMPER?
GIVE HIM PUNANI, BUT HE WANTS MY BUM-BUM!

DAAI BRA ANIES HY'S A FOKKEN ROU BRA
EK BLOM MET ANIES LEKKER OPPIE SOFA
HE LOVE YO-LANDI COZ IM BLONDE ALL OVER
MAAR YOH! DAAI ANIES HY HOU VAN MY BOUDE!
Translated:
THAT BOY ANIES HE'S A FUCKIN RAW BOY
I CHILL WITH ANIES NICE ON THE SOFA
HE'S LOVES YO-LANDI COS I'M BLONDE ALL OVER
BUT JEEZ! THAT ANIES, HE REALLY LOVES MY BUM-BUM!

from YT: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8nrF5aXPlQ

Wow, I dint' know Elvis' mom drank her pee-pee?!!

Duuuuude really, pee-pee?? it's a non-issue considering the bulk of their depraved soiree-

Oh and Jerryk???-No need for all the draconian measures in an attempt to adjust society to your idyllic model: The military has rigorous psyche-screens for the guys whose job it is to turn the keys, enter the codes, and push the big red button and folks with better ideas (not unlike yours) are usually MP's or infantry!

"Normally I don't do this
But I'm gonna hit ya'll off with a little taste of the remix
Ya'll ready, here we go

I pick you up from the club
take you home to make some love
Got a surprise close your eyes
I'm gonna cover you with suds

I'm gonna give you some poo-poo
I'm gonna give you some pee-pee
I'm gonna give you some doo-doo
Wash it down with some wee-wee

This is the remix edition of the song about pissing
I got that peeing, leaking, reeking, and there's juice in the kitchen

(talking ...)
yeah, that's how it goes at a R. Kelly party
I sip Cris, you drink piss
I'm wanna piss on you remix, ya heard
Nah, I'm serious I really do want to piss on you

Definitely a pee-pee collider.

>> ^serosmeg:

Yes, but what about the Large Hardon Collider?
>> ^carrot:
LHC is proton-proton collision, not proton-antiproton. Tevatron was proton-antiproton though. Just saying.

@messenger

There are a couple of choices we have to celebrate Golden Badges.

For you, dear messenger, for you?

Allow us to present to you.... The golden pee-pee.

For Golden One Level One, that is definitely a golden pee-pee for messenger!

Congratulations!

Each month I pay these guys less than the tip I leave when I go out to dinner, and they bring me any movie I want as often as my whims dictate. That's a really amazing deal. So, why am I so mad at them? Oh right. The word "Qwickster"... Might as well be Ka-ka-poo-poo-pee-pee-ster.