Fuck, bro. That’s so dildos.
Good luck on the gi test. Vomiting blood sucks, and I’ve only had to for a few days once. Ugh.
Glad to hear you’ve got some time, though. Are you on a transplant list yet? The sooner the better. Do you know if a partial liver transplant is an option?

Tell your friends and family, just like I’m telling Videosift readers right now, donate blood, plasma, or platelets. You may need them some day. I know they put more albumen in you, and I’m sure you’ll need more. Know your blood type?

Stay optimistic. Wishing you well.

Brutal. That’s dildos. Worse than a scuba tank full of farts.

they missed conception bay, dildo, south dildo, come by chance, little heart's ease, tickles, nugget's bay, random island, lady cove, and the motion. and that's just on the east coast of newfoundland.

Your video, The Great Canadian Dildo, has made it into the Top 15 New Videos listing. Congratulations on your achievement. For your contribution you have been awarded 1 Power Point.

Please tell me there's a place in Dildo where tourists can buy a souvenir dildo. If not, that's a real missed opportunity.

*ban spam. Although I like the ring for sex bell I buy all my anal dildos American!

Do you think perhaps there was a cookie reading mom and dad's search history? I don't know how the back end of it works but you're the Captain and I'm Lieutenant Columbo investigating this murder of what could have been excellent amateur porn... with... dildos...

Captain, it occurs to me that perhaps the dad makes amateur videos and the search would have taken the child to his own mother's amateur dildo porn.

We have motive and opportunity.

I may find myself using that dildo boomerang analogy in the future....

k, I'm going Wednesday Addams on yall, so fair warning if you can't stomach the grotesque. It's just my sense of humor is very dark. This is one of the few times I'll do you a favor by breaking the fourth wall of my videosift persona. Mainly because I enjoyed this video and the concept is really neat; but, I can't help my brain from going where it goes in its logical conclusions. It's tldr so you'll skip it anyway. Doesn't matter to me, first and foremost, I post for me, not you -- though I acknowledge it is public and therefore for the public's consumption, it is so purely for reasons of science:

Is there a section at the Empathy Museum for empathizing with EMT drivers? Seeing dead and dying bodies in every conceivable way on a daily basis. How do you try on those shoes?

A friend of mine who was a technician for many years told me he witnessed dozens of different forms of decapitation and loads of ways a person can lose one or more or all of their limbs; or, how about this one -- a man who squatted over a plunger he had suctioned to the bottom of a tub because he was too much of a prude to buy a dildo, slipped in the tub while he was pleasuring himself anally...

It tore up through his bowels and punctured out of his abdomen. He was still alive but out cold from the shock while his bowels flooded his insides; dead not long after his wife had made the call.

Listening to an EMT driver discuss their years of experience is one of the best ways to empathize with the human condition.

Or here's another good one: Go work in a nursing home and learn what being old and dying is like.

But cool, I get to wear oversized women's shoes... wait, I already do that. Here, empathize with me: wear pumps and stockings for an hour, then chuck tailors and socks for two hours, then pumps, then chuck tailors, then pumps, then chuck tailors.

I'm gonna open myself a true empathy museum in collaboration with the Holocaust Museum. Could you imagine if the Holocaust Museum had you wear the shoes of dead Jews? Would anyone take that seriously? I seriously doubt it.

Aside from alternating between gender-based shoes, my empathy museum will also allow you to interact with people who have low functioning autism and have a discussion with a man who has severe brain damage because his dad was involved in organized crime and the price of not paying a debt on time was that his family got murdered before his very eyes. Lucky for him, only brain damage. Sole survivor. Let him regale you with tales of woes made entirely of spitting sounds and aimless staring.

Empathy's a crazy thing. Makes you want to crawl inside a hole sometimes. But if you emerge sane and ready to TRULY empathize by doing a goddamn thing about it -- and not just proclaim your civil rights and be angry at the injustices of the world and how unfair your lot or the lot of other pitiful humans are -- maybe you'll have what it takes to gain an iota of true humanity. That's what my empathy museum is all about.

Not that I'm against this form of chic empathy. I quite enjoy art installations.

You gotta follow the follow up...



Shut up woman I gotta go to work and stir the jar of penises...it's gotta get done for those dildos to get out the door you know.