Your video, True Facts: Macaques, has made it into the Top 15 New Videos listing. Congratulations on your achievement. For your contribution you have been awarded 1 Power Point.

Sorry, but it was actually a crested black macaque.
https://www.sfgate.com/bayarea/article/Lawsuit-settled-over-rights-to-monkey-s-selfie-12189850.php

Those baby macaques are friggin' adorable!

This is song about a nasty breakup, where he's been out drinking away the pain.

Formidable = formidable, or great, and is used in the sense of terrific or amazing.
minable = pathetic, wretched (he sings fort minable, very pathetic, to rhyme with formidable)


lyrics in french:

Formidable, formidable
Tu étais formidable, j'étais fort minable,
Nous étions formidables,
Formidable,
Tu étais formidable,
J'étais fort minable,
Nous étions formidables.

Eh, l'bébé, oups : mademoiselle,
Je vais pas vous draguer, promis, juré,
J'suis célibataire et depuis hier - putain,
J'peux pas faire d'enfants, mais bon, c'est pas... eh, reviens !
5 minutes quoi, j't'ai pas insulté, j'suis poli, courtois,
Et un peu fort bourré et pour les mecs comme moi
Vous avez autre chose à faire, vous m'pourriez vu hier
Où j'étais

Formidable, formidable
Tu étais formidable, j'étais fort minable,
Nous étions formidables,
Formidable,
Tu étais formidable, j'étais fort minable,
Nous étions formidables.

Eh tu t'es regardé, tu t'crois beau
Parce que tu t'es marié ?!
Mais c'est qu'un anneau, mec, t'emballes pas,
Elle va t'larguer comme elles font chaque fois,
Et puis l'autre fille, tu lui en a parlé ?
Si tu veux je lui dis, comme ça c'est réglé,
Et au p'tit aussi, enfin si vous en avez,
Attends 3 ans, 7 ans et là vous verrez
Si c'est

Formidable, formidable,
Tu étais formidable, j'étais fort minable,
Nous étions formidables,
Formidable,
Tu étais formidable, et j'étais fort minable,
Nous étions formidables.

Et, petite, oh, pardon : petit,
Tu sais dans la vie y'a ni méchant ni gentil,
Si maman est chiante, c'est qu'elle a peur d'être mamie,
Si papa trompe maman, c'est parce que maman vieillit, tiens !
Pourquoi t'es tout rouge? Beh, reviens, gamin,
Et qu'est-ce que vous avez tous
A me regarder comme un singe, vous ?
Ah, oui, vous êtes saints, vous,
Bande de macaques !
Donnez moi un bébé singe, il sera

Formidable, formidable
Tu étais formidable, j'étais fort minable,
Nous étions formidables,
Formidable,
Tu étais formidable, j'étais fort minable,
Nous étions formidables

While a bit cheeky, this is not a monkey, but rather a gibbon, which is an ape. This girl is more closely related to you than she is to a macaque, capuchin, or any other monkey. Chained up primates FTL. Upvote for cuteness in the face of oppression.

"How many conditioned behaviors does it take for a macaque to get a fucking APPLE SLICE around here?!"

"I think you still have to be a fairly intelligent person, because your brain cannot work if it doesn't have any understanding of the simple stuff in life."

Intelligence is in part a biological condition, some people are able to learn faster, and understand complex ideas others can't grasp, while others struggle with material most people understand. That seems like a factor that could limit a person's success to me, its not something they can appreciably change. So how does that fit in with being able to do anything you put your mind to? Are they just as guaranteed to succeed as someone who is smarter? If there goal is to be smarter how much smarter can they be? Sounds like a situational factor to me, one that might limit chances for success.


"Also people who believe in theirselves, who are strongly rooted in their own reality can that way better affect other people around them."

I'd label this one 'under what costs'. I'd say George Bush is strongly rooted in his own reality, he's had a lot of success, he's rich, charismatic (in the way a macaque is charismatic)well connected, and president of one of the largest countries on the planet. You could argue he got there because he's rooted in his own reality, I'd also argue his strong roots in his own reality has caused some very big problems for vast amounts of people. Osama Bin Laden is strongly rooted in his own reality, and by some measure successful (he certainly seems to think he is), but to a lot of people he's a cancer that's killing society. I'd like to think ethics still has a place when achieving your goals.

I suppose I'm playing devil's advocate because I really do believe a person's ability to motivate themselves and be persistent can have a great effect on the direction in their life, and their progress towards their goals. But at the same time I don't think there are any guarantees, hell the only guarantee you'll ever get is that at some point you're going to die. There are things you can control in life and things you can't, sometimes things just don't work out (sometimes they work out great). I suppose the smart thing is to set goals that are within your limits, or the ability to recognize what is likely possible. The problem I frequently see (and probably amongst the self-help goers in the video) is that they set limits that are well below their actual ability, so the problem becomes not that they lack the ability to do something, but the belief that they can.


On a side note my book Ten Simple Steps to Demotivation isn't exactly flying off the bookshelves.

Hey sometimes -- I submitted this video:
http://www.videosift.com/video/Macaque-monkeys-swimming-underwater

It looks like it might be a dupe of this one, which is dead:
http://www.videosift.com/video/monkeys-swimming-underwater

If it was the same one, you're welcome to discard mine and use its embed code to fix yours.

to those who talk about homosexuality being unnatural, I hasten to point out some other things that are unnatural:

computers
plastic
air conditioning
clothes
books
reading
speech
marriage
toilets


Additionally, homosexuality occurs in many animal species: Big horn sheep, bonobos, lesbian rhesus macaques, penguins, American Bison, giraffes,
oh, and look: lions too!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_animals_displaying_homosexual_behavior
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/6066606.stm

Now the traditional counter argument to this is "we shouldn't use animal behavior as a justification for human behavior". that's fine, just as long as you pick one or the other. either use the "it's unnatural" argument, and allow the "but it's natural for these critters" argument, or drop the "natural" argument altogether, you can';t pick some "natural" behaviors and ignore others.





for those who talk about homosexuality being wrong because it can't make babies, and making babies is what sex is for:
fine, please give up oral sex, wanking, and recreational sex.

what percentage of hetrosexual behaviors lead to making babies?
if the average adult lives to 75, that's 55+ years having sex.
over the course of a lifetime, americans average out to 60 times per year.
that's 3465 times.
the average american has 2.5 kids.
that means one out of 1386 times having sex leads to making babies.
that's 0.07215% of all sex acts leading to babies.
boy, that feels statistically significant.

The crab-eating Macaque is one of the types of monkeys that have been used as space testflight animals.

This is NOT in China, nor is it a Chinese monkey. It's Japan and a Japanese monkey.

This monkey and his handlers usually perform in an area of Tokyo called Odaiba. I've seen them many times. And these tricks are nothing compared to what I've seen this monkey do, just amazing! As well this is one of the best jobs going, the monkey and his handlers (he has 2 handlers one man, one woman) they perform 3 times an hour for about 10 minutes (for about 5 hours a day) and after every performance they collect money in a hat. Every time I've seen them they have collected well over $300.00 per performance!!! [That's at least $900.00 per hour, and I'll bet the monkey gets none of it, time to unionize! ;-) ]


The monkey is a type of Macaque, usually called a Japanese Snow Monkey. There are many funny pictures of wild Snow Monkeys enjoying public hotsprings and even sipping beer or sake.
For example:
http://www.pri.kyoto-u.ac.jp/shinka/keitou/kinoshita-HP/Onsen/Onsen-English.html

Another interesting point is over 90% of all captive and domesticated Macaque are infected with herpes-B virus. So I never get too close when I watch.

The genus for macaque (pronounced ma-kak) monkeys is "macaca". I probably should've used that spelling, sorry.

I'm not so sure that Allen knows what he's saying in this, (which would be par for the course). He doesn't act like he's using a slur, and if he's using the word "macaque", he's mispronouncing it and adding an extra syllable. Urban dictionary (until a few days ago) and dictionary.com don't list any variation of the word as a slur, and I've never heard it used as a slur (and I've spent a lot of my life in the south), so I just can't get upset about this.

But that doesn't change the fact that Allen is indeed garbage.

First of all he NEVER says Macaque, he says macaca, or makaka.

And what is funny that (a) he claims he doesn't know what 'macaca' means and (b) he now claims to have said mohawk, the nickname his people gave the indian guy with a mullet. Obviously, he didn't come close to mohawk, which every one know what that looks like.

And more damning, he mother is of French Tunisian background, in which circles the term 'macaca' is apparently used.

Koant, I'm not talking about the literal translation of "the N-word" (which I put in quotes because it is how it now stupidly referred to in this country) in French - I'm saying that "macaque" is French slang for it. It's still hurled by French fans at soccer matches when they play African opponents. And there's no doubting Allen's French-immigrant mother or Allen's continued fluency in French.
Whatever you think it is, it certainly wasn't flattering to the only person of color in a group of hundreds.
And does "ant" just downvote anything embarassing/stupid the right-wing does? My understanding of VideoSift etiquette is explaining a downvote in the comments...