Saw Transformers 2 last night... what a pile of garbage.

And holy shit. That was the worst pile of unintelligent garbage I've seen in a long time. 1st movie? I liked it. This one?

WHAT. THE. FUCK!?!

Seriously? Ok, I can appreciate Megan Fox as much as the next guy, but we all know she wouldn't even be an actress if she wasn't smoking hot. But to have her first scene in the movie be a camera approach from the rear of her bent over on a bike airbrushing upside down??? What the hell.
Then there's the REALLY bad jokes. I mean, they're downright juvenile. Dogs humping? Pot brownies? (okay, I chuckled on that one but they took it too far with her tackling people and all that)And that little fucking RC Truck that's inexplicably nice to them the whole time, and ends up humping Fox's leg. Is that really the best they can come up with?
And that fight in the woods where Prime bites the dust? He gets his ass kicked and then decides to pull out the flaming sword of doom(energon ax). The first thing I thought of was Power Rangers. You know what I'm talking about here. Every episode, they would face off against some monster and get their asses handed to them. Then all of a sudden the monster would get all huge, and they would follow suit with their vehicles, and you all wonder "Why the fuck didn't they do that in the first place!?"

Then we have a thousand year old inactive Prime in the form of a stealth bomber. I know they can choose what they want to be and all, but he's been in a robot coma, so how the hell is he in the form of a brand-new bomber? Then he wakes up, and I know they want to show that he's old and all, bu couldn't they have done that with creaking sound effect and rust instead of a fucking metal beard and a fucking cane? I won't even go into how anti-climatic the final battle between Prime and the Fallen was.

I guess what it comes down to is that the movie was made for idiots, and it caters very well to that demographic.

Oh, and the next time I see a jive-talking ghetto SMART CAR (Why the fuck would you want to be a Smart car?) with a fucking gold tooth I'm going on a murderous rampage of every involved.

[edit] Oh, and why wouldn't you just take that shard or Allspark and use it on O.P. instead of HOPING some fucking metallic dust would do the trick? And what would have happened if Shia didn't die? Fucking plot holes.
MarineGunrock says...

^Yeah, I read a comment about that on RottenTomatoes. It was something like "It's sad when you have a $200 million budget and 150 minute runtime, and not one memorable moment or scene."

ReverendTed says...

>> ^MarineGunrock:
^Yeah, I read a comment about that on RottenTomatoes. It was something like "It's sad when you have a $200 million budget and 150 minute runtime, and not one memorable moment or scene."

It sounds like it was all horribly memorable.

enoch says...

michael bay just likes to blow stuff up.
he disregards storyline,character development and any trace of subtle nuance.
imagine the movie "armageddon" without james cameron directing and only having michael bay and jerry bruckheimer?
the man is just a rich dude who thinks thats all movies should be...blowing crap up.
it's a shame he is trashing what could be a great storyline,nevermind the nostalgia factor alone.
totally wasted potential=epic fail

demon_ix says...

What bothered me the most was the geography...

I live in Israel. Geographically, we're between Egypt (where the pyramids are) and Aqaba (the most south-west city in Jordan). They also travel to Petra after reaching Jordan, which is about 100 miles north of Aqaba in a straight line (and there are no straight roads in that region).

- There is no way to see Jordan from the pyramids.
- There is no border crossing between Egypt and Jordan (Israel is in the way).
- The pyramids are in Egypt. Why would Jordanian helicopters be the ones coming to assist?
- There's no way to get from the pyramids to Petra by ground vehicle in under 10 hours (even if you ignore having to cross two international borders). They do it twice in the movie.
- Petra isn't exactly one tiny spot with only one cave.

So whoever wrote the script for the final 50% of the movie didn't even have Google maps at his disposal.
Either that or mixing facts into the script is a big no-no in Michael Bay movies.

MaxWilder says...

You people have insanely high expectations for a Michael Bay movie. I knew going in that it was gonna be a CG robot fight fest with absolutely no script, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

What the hell were you expecting? Shakespeare?

demon_ix says...

My standard for sci-fi movies isn't that they make real-world sense. If I wanted that, I'd watch documentaries.

What I want, is for the movie to make sense with it's own set of rules, and when it breaks any real-world rules, it should at least explain why it works that way in it's own world...

For example, I have no problem with Superman flying around, being invulnerable and seeing through anything but lead. I do, however, have a problem with the assumption that a projectile moving fast enough around the planet will turn back time.

At least explain it... He just goes and does it like it's common sense...

budzos says...

I found it to be almost the exact same quality level as the first one. That is to say, excruciating to watch any scene that doesn't focus on the robots. And yes, it was way too long, dragged out, and full of incredibly dumb decisions.

There were a couple cool moments though, all having to do with Prime kicking ass. He ripped a decepticon's head in half. Between that and when he cut a decepticon's head off in the first one, Prime kicks ass in these movies. I liked how ruthless he was, as though he really hated the decepticons for being such destructive assholes for millions of years.

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