Heroic? So, some river boarder sees a squirrel on a rock and thinks: "awww, how cute. I'm going to go over there and see if he needs help, because clearly he couldn't have gotten there on his own by swimming. Hey little buddy, you want a ride on my extremely non-natural looking piece of flotation device, something which doesn't exist in your environment."

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH. Terrifying man-thing. It's going to eat me. I just came out to this rock to wait while I gathered up my energy to swim the rest of the way across the river and some monster slithered down the river and emerged, all yellow and black and hairy looking. Leave me alone, vile beast! Curse you!"

"You look scared little squirrel, are you afraid of the water? Here, get on my board. Come on. I'll move a little closer to you to make sure you get on. Stop backing away."

"OH NO! He is moving in for the kill, quick, where can I run! Ha, the silly monster can't swim up river, I shall go there! I shall jump to that rock with the fast moving water on it and show this evil monster how squirrels swim. That will show him not to mess with my kind!"

*JUMP*

"Glub Glub. Blargh, this is turning out to be much harder than I thought. Ahhhh, glub glub."

"Oh no, the little guy jumped in the river again. I'll just swim over and save him from his ultimate demise. Silly guy, why did he do that? I was offering him a ride, why didn't he understand that was what I was doing?"

"Glub glub; AAAAAHH, it's coming closer. I am doomed. Farewell cruel world, I knew thee not long but I loved thee so well."

"Gotcha. Here, take a ride on my board. That's better, isn't it little guy? Here, I'll bring you to shore."

"Wah! You have trapped me! Are you going to take me back to your friends to feast on me together? Wait. What is this thing? What magics be this? How does this trap float so well. It must be made of some sort of advanced tree structure that only the giants know how to grow. I am tempted to jump back in the river but I am certain you will catch me again and my energy will have been wasted. No, I will play the possum and wait for my moment. Yes, just when you think you have got me, I shall spring away to safety. Silly giants, they do not know anything. You are bringing me closer to shore, yes. Closer. Closer. *Jump* Hahahahhahaha. Silly giant, now I am up a tree, you will never catch me. Of course, you could have avoided all of this by leaving me alone! Next time, don't waste both of our time and energy by trying to catch a squirrel, we are too smart for you giant monsters!"

"There you go little buddy, now you are safe. Shouldn't have jumped in the river like that, though. Next time you see a human, expect them to be trying to help you, man. Now I will go and cover myself in patchouli oil and smoke some weed."

Moral of the story: Leave wild animals the fuck alone.

*backs away slowly*

Fuck you dude, squirrel fella didn't know what was going on. Deus ex machina, he was in danger and now he's safe, that's all he knows. Guy saved its life. What is your net contribution to the fauna of earth today? Bet he's one up on you, you self righteous arse.

What I said was mostly in jest, but I will entertain my learned colleague's well-reasoned arguments with a response.

"Squirrel fella didn't know what was going on"? That's right. He didn't. He didn't know the intentions of the human, other than his general instinct of "stay away from non-squirrels." His fear of him was totally justified.

Deus Ex Machina? There was no unexpected intervention which led to a happy ending here, that is my point. The squirrel expected the guy to grab him, he just didn't want him to. My point is that if the guy had kept on riding down the river, the squirrel would have been fine. But for his interference, the squirrel wouldn't have been drowning. His actions were negligent. His actions caused a situation of peril for that squirrel. If the squirrel had jumped toward the man and entered the calm part of the river and failed to swim, I might agree that intervention would have been necessary. Instead, the squirrel jumped in the exact opposite direction of the person, likely fearing for his life and choosing the most direct escape route, thus dooming himself. But he wouldn't have jumped that way if the guy hadn't been there. We can't know where he would have jumped, but I doubt it would have been in the most violent part of the river. Animal instincts aren't dumb, otherwise that squirrel would have been long dead.

Guy saved his life? Did he? Did we see a drowned squirrel swimming away from the rock before the guy even got there? Was there something that I missed in this video? Was the squirrel in imminent danger of being eaten by a vicious squirrel-eating miniature river-swimming orca? My point is the guy put the squirrel in danger simply by being there. Even after the squirrel jumped, it is not known that the squirrel would have drowned if the man had simply swam away. We assume because we think that squirrels are shitty swimmers.

Self-righteous? Did I say that I don't touch wildlife? Did I say that I might not have done the same thing in his position? No. I am simply saying that we should all abide by the general principle that wild animals do not need our help. Our interactions with them should be constrained to watching them pass and keeping them out of our areas when necessary and shooting and eating them when legal and not deleterious to the species. None of us should assume that our interactions with wildlife are anything other than a semi-masturbatory effort that serves the single purpose of entertaining us and making us feel good with little to no actual understanding of the animal's position.

At what point is the squirrel 'drowning'? He jumps into the water and is heroically trying to _swim_ upstream a bit, away from the large beast attacking him. If the guy had just left him alone and the squirrel happened to not be able to swim upstream then the squirrel would have swam the other direction. There's no 'drowning' involved here. Definitely it's swimming, not drowning.