How about we observe saving time, but everyone gets the day off and no one has a heart attack, car accident, nor write ups from asshole bosses? If you can't get the day off, bosses are legally obligated not to shit on you.

Fuck the police -- that was my cousin!

You do realize the people who have the whole world as their oyster are in an entirely different form of isolation, right? You're oversimplifying the concept of isolation in an effort to push your Jesus drug.

I understand this because I have lived that life; being both the life of the parties at fortune 500 companies and a solitary hermit, addicted and lonely in a world that no one else fully understands. Not because of a lack of Jesus drug, my friend. I tried the Jesus drug and it is the cause of much of my cognitive dissonance.

The love of a God didn't save me from trauma, sexual and gender identity issues, clinical depression, and the ever looming bipolar disorder. Living is hard, even if it's also simultaneously fun and easy for me to succeed; because the concept of my personal identity isn't flush with the expectations that society and my family have. Being myself almost always gets me in trouble and is misunderstood with sometimes violent repercussions. This forms further cognitive dissonance which is a psychological isolation that has physical isolation as a matter of course. Depression runs in my family, despite all of their love and adoration of Jesus. Southern Baptists, bless their hearts.

There are so many other factors you're ignoring just so that you can present the lamest of analogies of seeds on dry soil and sin cages.

Sin cages. Ignorant science versus the logical sin cage. Nuff said.

There's almost nothing logical about anything you say. The only logic is that you make things make sense according to the Bible. If it's scientifically logical but goes against the teachings Christ or God, it's wrong. If the Bible can support the science, it's good!

But that's not how science works. Scientists do not make stupid excuses in order to support prior written works which lack evidence. If something doesn't make sense, a scientist no longer uses it as a basis to explain the world around them.

You, on the other hand, make every excuse to prove your stupid philosophy is true and that science is wrong for not agreeing upon the truth of your hippy God love cult. Prove me to be objectively incorrect in my perspective and I will give up on my convictions. Because what is a conviction if it's a false one based upon circular logic and feel good analogies? Oh, them feels. Them Jesus feels. Jesus hippy love.

<3

Yogi Berra and his freaking quotes. hahaha

aww, Yogi Berra...

I'll never forget that time you pooped in my bed...

Three cheers for the epitome of cool!

And such a cute kitty, too! *chin scratches*

Boner, it's been SOOOO long since I last thanked you for posting this embedded video on my profile. It is truly (and I mean that with sincerity) an epic moment in Hollywood. I couldn't imagine Videosift without this THIS THIS THIS THIS

THANK YOU, BonerEmake, THANK YOU!

I believe mole rat jesus died on the 31st year, raised on the 33rd year, so it's more of a tradition of mole rat self sacrifice. Like seppuku or Harry Carry -- someone correct me on the written versus spoken forms of this Japanese tradition (in need of revival).

But you may wonder, "Aren't there any mole rats that don't believe in the tradition of self sacrifice?" And I would tell you, Yes. Yes, there are plenty that don't follow these traditions.

And you'd think in reply, "Well, that's odd. If these," let's called them "'alternative' mole rats broke away from the traditions of self sacrifice, why aren't there more older mole rats today?"

Well, it's a sad but simple truth, Timmy, but usually the jesus worshipping mole rats kill the nontraditional, alternative mole rats (who have the ability to live forever) -- and, really, any type of worshipper of something can fulfill this role of antagonizer: mole rats who worship pagan mole gods, power, money, the God of molterial possessions, AIDS. And these mole rats murder the alternative mole rats. Or drive them into suicide, fulfilling their ritualistic traditions of self sacrifice for their sun mole god. Or some type of mole rat god. There are many others...

One day the mole rat society will have a scientific term for the process by which a restrictive institution innately develops out of a fearful mass of moles, becoming normative mole rat behavior. One day we will understand how these fearful, normative moles inadvertently MURDER their fellow mole simply through their ignorance and their evil, sinful desires for power and dominance over their world, their fellow mole rat. (Is it a form of subconscious sociopathy? With hidden sociopaths leading the charge?)

They turn love into hate, declaring their moral mole rat codes as ethical, in order to profit and/or maintain their sense of safety, their illogical, SELFISH mole rat world order, to save their own asses and the asses of their mole rat children from mole rat hell. Sell. Fish. Mote. Eee. Vations.

It's a simple process of societal entropy within the mole rat community. An 'us versus them' mentality that just sits hidden between the conscious and subconscious mole rat mind. It's fucking not going to be "THEM" because those mole rats don't practice the ritual of self sacrifice to maintain the mole rat average life expectancy.

TL;DR: MOLE RATS DIE KNOWINGLY AND UNKNOWINGLY IN THE NAMES OF THE SUN GODS. Mole rat God bless mole rat America.

No, no, my moral compass is right in tune with that of the society, it's just that if you stare at me wrong I'll murder you. That's all. Not much of a difference at HEY ARE YOU STARING AT ME? Oh sorry, I have astigmatism so I can't see too good. Either that or EVERYONE IS LOOKING AT ME!!! AHHHHH!!!

I mean, hey I am all for peace and harmony, you just have to STOP. Stop it!! WHY WON'T YOU STOP IT!!!!!!!!! /STAB

There was a song with lyrics about reality being a ride on a bus and I just realized how ignorantly racist it is! God must truly have a sick sense of humor so if Jesus is real, he needs his meds pronto.

Is he man, is he god -- that long hair and those robes -- I gotta wonder if Jesus is transgender. It's more socially acceptable to be a half god than half woman. Just ask Kevin Sorbo.

Gods and half men of the bus. Also why you don't fuck with bus riders. That "I'm a Motherfucker" man from that infamous amber lamps video: Thor.

Every god rides a bus. My wife rides the metro, which is an even sicker version of a bus, the woman is a Goddess.

No, no, no it's wizard magic. Stop denying the truth and join the majority in our moral duty to behold miracles. The earth, the sun, the tides go in, and the wizard detects all keys. Every public transportation has a wizard. It's just common knowledge, dude. Grow up -- Accept the miracle!!!!!

YOUR WAY OF THINKING TRANMOGRIFIES THE MIRACLES OF GODS AND WIZARDS INTO MUNDANE BULLSHIT. Doesn't life shine brighter and carry dutiful meaning when we belive in miracles and predestined immaculate key detection?

I prefer having myself a Mom Party with a box of select Franzia.

Keeping the Oh Snap alive! Just waiting for the Snap Son to make it's come back. I like both of these so much.

Personally, I'm rather fond of a singular Snap or SNAP. Maybe some Shnap or Shizz-nap -- put that one together with some dee oh double gee!

I just really like the word "snap", especially in this particular emotional context. It's so positive and upbeat; I feel awake. And it's not at all contradictory or assuming like Bad, Cool or Radical; and, not nearly as aggrandizing as Awesome.

It's also not emotionally inappropriate like Sick, Rude or Bomb. Nor strange and alienating like Gnarly, Gnar, Gnar Gnar, and Sicky Gnar Gnar. Or as fluffy and clueless as Bodacious and Tubular; you can't Shwing everything; and, calling your mom's apple pie Tight or Fit is just... not right. (And what's Book?)

Snap. It's the musical sound of your fingers. Addam's Family says what? Snap Snap.

Still... NOT excited enough to go out and pick up some onyx yeast and put it on my toast. But, if I see it laying around on... someone's floor(?...?) I'll give it a go.

((?...?) = the questioning look of mild disgust on my face, best represented colloquially as a deadpan "wut.")

Ha ha ha ha ha! You're a good person, newt. May you get better. (Citation: Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy Grail, Scene 5, Villager #3)