But where is the onion soup mix stirred into a tub of sour cream and served with Lays?

Doc_M, I'm on my way out the door and won't be back until Sunday evening, but let me say quickly that you're a worthless piece of shit and everybody hates you. I won't say this to your face, of course, because I don't want your tae kwon do having ass breaking something off in my rear.

I see you answered that silly roast questionnaire. Number 24, your best memory is sitting in your dorm window? Was your second favorite moment brushing your teeth this morning? It's obvious it takes very little to please you, and you were probably inspired deeply by your elementary school principal. And who's the fucktard that writes these damn questions who can't figure out how to spellcheck? It's 2008, spellcheck is automated in most word processors these days, so get rid of your Word Perfect 1.1 and bit torrent a copy of Microsoft Word, you worthless sack of non-typing shit.

I don't know much about you except you're a French Onion Soup eating, Rob Roy drinking, golf playing doctor. Actually, when you think long and hard about that, I think I do know a lot about you. Here you are looking fabulous after a shot down the 18th hole. Poke it out for the world to see, Doc!

Okay scrubs, I'm out. Have a great roast. The timing for this one is terrible for me. Later gents!