YES! Thank you MATH!



you could have left out the part "Just joking"

More jokes for people who don't have the time

The only people I'd really knock (not as a joke) are the payer, not the payee.

And now children, you know where dad jokes come from.

Today’s MAGA terrorism- Greg Abbot who has telegraphed his intent to pardon a MAGA man who posted repeatedly about his desire to shoot BLM protesters, posted that he was on his way to do it, then went to Austin and murdered one and was convicted of the murder in Texas.

But Greg Abbot likes his politics and hates BLM so murder is just fine with him.
Death, destruction, and debauchery…yep, that’s you bob.

More deaths than WW2 and Vietnam combined, more destruction of the economy than anything ever, more child sex charges, claims of lemon party orgies BY YOUR OWN MEMBERS (Cawthorn), sex trafficking (Gaetz), worshiping the man who admitted he bought miss teen USA to leer at naked young teenaged girls getting changed (also Epstein’s best friend even after his child rape conviction), years of underage congressional page raping (Mark Foley, covered up by other Republicans until it became public knowledge), pedophilic rapist coach protecting (Gym Jordan), and a daily stream of unethical, immoral, often criminal activity you simply ignore despite having multiple examples of it rubbed in your face daily.

What do you have to support your similar accusation against Democrats? Public health taken seriously, the economy recovered, unemployment almost too low, and maybe one or two instances of Democratic individuals accused (not even convicted) of sex crimes, and nonsense insanity about Illuminati pizza pedophiles and Hunter Biden being a multi billionaire, made up nonsense blaming every MAGA act of terrorism on the victims (Pelosi), etc….one big nothing burger.

Bonus- According to multiple employees Tesla has been accessing private footage from customer cars including in their homes, naked, having sex. For years employees circulated these private videos in the company as jokes and memes while publicly Elon was insisting there were stringent safeguards in place that would make that kind of thing impossible.
In California, that’s 12 separate crimes every single time the car is on private property (it’s ok to record in public without notification). Criminal investigations are underway.
I can’t imagine what China will do. They absolutely won’t allow an American company to put millions of cameras in China that the company can access and record just like we won’t let them sell Chinese cell phones in America for the same reason. This is going to hurt Tesla more than you can imagine…people don’t like being spied on, neither do countries.

Double Bonus- The trust fund Crow family, that funded the Ginny Thomas Tea Party political lobbying organization and paid her $125 k per year, paid to build the Thomas library wing, took the Thomases on multi $500000 vacations every year along with people with cases before the court, turns out to be one of the most prolific collectors of Nazi memorabilia in America and his brother is apparently running and funding forced sex parties where sex trafficked women are forced to perform public sex acts for his entertainment. Thomas claims he didn’t have to report the tens of millions in gifts because Crow was his friend….they met years after he was appointed as a Supreme Court justice and became friends by Crow buying his “friendship” for millions in unreported bribes. Your people.

D’oh.
New reports indicate more ACTUAL censorship by the disgraced ex president, this time calls from the White House to Disney execs demanding they severely reprimand or fire Kimmel for telling Trump jokes.
And
In 2017 he had his fcc commissioner Oje Pie directly threaten to investigate Colbert over Trump jokes he made on his show.

Since you pretended to be concerned over your misinterpretation of the Twitter files, you MUST be outraged at ACTUAL government censorship, right? Why not?

Your video, Some People Just Want To Hear Knock-Knock Jokes, has made it into the Top 15 New Videos listing. Congratulations on your achievement. For your contribution you have been awarded 1 Power Point.

"I'm so old I was around when some of these jokes were first told!"

I don't mean to be mean - definitely some funny ones mixed in with the old jokes.

Still rehashing the Carter Page stupidity bob?
“ the Mueller Report concluded that the investigation did not establish that Page coordinated in Russia's interference efforts, but did establish that the Steele dossier was right about Page attending high-level meetings with Russians, even though he denied doing so.”

Pretty sad, especially considering all the convictions of administration officials for crimes against the US…Russian collusion/unregistered foreign agents …that came from it. Edit: Recall, Trump DID have secret meetings with Russian officials about Clinton at Trump tower during his campaign that he then lied about, and was only not prosecuted because the prosecutor said he was too stupid and ignorant to KNOW it was illegal so he couldn’t convict him…but it definitely was an attempt at illicit collusion with Russia that he admits to.

This investigation was thoroughly investigated and the actual investigation did not find what he claimed. Sorry.

Trump’s weaponization of every federal department is public record, from the DOJ acting as his private counsel and jack booted thugs to the IRS directing local police to label any protester an ANTIFA agent unless proven otherwise and hiring violent convicts to “infiltrate” BLM and instigate violence, to Trump repeatedly denying disaster relief to states that he lost in the election, to withholding military assistance to blackmail a foreign leader into investigating and accusing Trump’s political rival’s family, all verified and codified.

These hearings are a total joke, the weaponization of congress, and a pure, totally not serious, rehash of the Durham report that found absolutely nothing actionable, only a very few clerical errors, zero convictions. Republicans simply can’t accept reality. Such a fool you are, buying every lie and ploy, absolutely NEVER removing your blinders.

To summarize- from the Page investigation, if memory serves, there were 36 officials CONVICTED of hundreds of crimes, most involving hiding their strong financial ties to Russia…from the Durham report investigating that investigation came 3 charges that were all tossed out of court for insufficient evidence….nothing burger. Now the idiot Republican house is trying again with the same (lack of) evidence because you can’t accept that you are LOSERS!

When Trump weaponized the federal government you cheered and clapped. You only care because that extreme righty weaponization is ending.

My mother worked at Houston Methodist Hospital when they first got an MRI in the 80’s.
Multiple employees were injured by entering the field with metal objects and more than once the machine itself was severely damaged. It’s no joke.
What was this moron thinking?

A particularly lame skit from a really bad episode. I thought it was at least 5 minutes too long to milk one joke.

Bwaaaahahahaha. Nothing to say on topic, no contradiction to offer, so you devolve into personal ad hom attacks again. That’s an admission that my points could not be contradicted and you have no argument to offer.

Hilarious you think knowing SOMETHING is like knowing everything about everything.
I’m sad you know so very little about anything. You were clearly shielded from adult topics in school and have no idea how to understand or deal with them.

Lol. I never amounted to much? Is that your assumption? I became exactly what I wanted to be, retired by around 30, home owner, property owner, no debt, no criminal record, with good health, a loving wife, an education, moral, ethical, responsible, and nearly obligation free. I AM living the American dream, friendo. You are the American nightmare….(an ignorant, opinionated, angry blowhard that believes people should only be allowed to learn what you in your unbelievable ignorance think is proper, who is so self centered and poorly educated their opinion on most topics could not be differentiated from an average 3rd grader. A repair technician so delusional he thinks that gives him some otherwise unattainable ethical medical knowledge because he knows the word ultrasound. If you are honest, which I know you are not, you lost at least 1/2 your net worth in the last year following your own incredibly dumb investment advice that everyone on the sift warned you was terrible advice, but you know better.)

I never wanted to tell others what to do….which seems to be what you think is the main measure of success. Having control over others is not what I call success, because I have morals and ethic and see having control as an obligation, a sacred duty owed to those you “control”, unlike yourself who only sees the control and personal opportunities to take advantage of those with less power.

Nothing’s holding me back. I’m exactly where I want to be.
My family is happy, healthy, financially stable, and have never been committed to mental institutions with major mental disorders I created in them through constant abuse. I don’t think you can say the same unless you lied again.

Bob….you SAY I’m wrong 100% of the time, then slink away into the shadows every time I rub your nose in verified facts that prove me correct time and time and time and time again. Was I wrong about Tesla? No. Trump? No. The election? No. Republican criminality? No.
What, exactly, am I wrong about? I know you can’t say….you just KNOW I am. 🤦‍♂️
Sadly, I will say you seem to be wrong about almost everything you say. Demonstrably, verifiably wrong….yet somehow you still believe you have much to teach us. That’s a mental disorder you should seek treatment for, no joke.

Every accusation from your ilk being an admission…why do you like being the ugliest dick on the sift?

PS- how’s that “ALL IN for the long term, buy all you can at $400.” Tesla investment going? How about the “BLM and ANTIFA attacked the capitol, which wasn’t actually attacked.” defense? How you doing on the “Pelosi was not actually attacked by a MAGA terrorist just spurned by his gay lover.” theory? How about the “everyone knows there was massive democratic election fraud” claim?

1st thought that came to me is this Onion joke is paid for by Paramount Studios, to promo Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves.

The title alone had me laughing enough to *promote. I wasn't expecting much out of the video once they'd made the original joke, but they did keep me laughing with the idea that I'm "part skeleton". As if!

Apparently none of these lies were a surprise to the RNC or other Republican representatives and were a running joke among Republicans before the election. (The joke being their voters are so stupid they’ll believe every lie a Republican tells them without ever checking.).

They knew he was a total fraud, but as they said before “we have no obligation to tell the truth”. Their excuse…there was no other Republican candidate running and they wanted power.

https://www.marketwatch.com/story/yes-top-house-republicans-knew-of-george-santoss-lies-before-his-election-in-november-11672160423?mod=commodities

https://nypost.com/2022/12/24/house-gop-leaders-aware-of-george-santos-fabrications/?link=mktw