I had to submit this video as this reminded me of it. Someone needs to put that soundtrack on this video for hilarious comedic effect!

Nice choreography. Why don't UFC fighters do all these things? Because they don't work. A kick with the instep is not going to do much damage, especially when someone is hopped up on drugs or adrenaline. The best self-defense moves are very simple, a strike to the eyes, a chop to the throat, a kick to the groin. A headbutt done before the first move works well. Jumping spinning kicks won't land 99% of the time.

On the other hand, this girl is far better equipped to defend herself than someone who has no training of this sort. Martial arts training will only help you be a better fighter, it will not necessarily make you invincible.

Award winning stuff - http://videosift.com/video/Football-in-the-Groin

*Doink*

*Doink*

Never let go of the groin. Not ever.

Tags for this video have been changed from 'fireworks, idiot, mishap, ouch, not stupid' to 'fireworks, idiot, mishap, ouch, not stupid, crotch, groin, charred weenis' - edited by SlipperyPete

"After kneeing the suspect in the groin, he doubled over and struck me on my shoulder with his face. I then drew my weapon and shot him in response to that attack."

>> ^Engels:

>> ^nomino:
Oh, I don't know, maybe the cctv camera over the bed? >> ^Engels:
Why is this more creepy than, say, a Star Wars or a more traditionally themed kids room?


Someone obviously hasn't played Portal Its not a functional cctv camera, its a game replica.


Actually, it's probably a nanny-cam.

That kid is hilarious. I immediately upvoted when he groined himself and said "OOooooh GlaDOS..."

A little bit of buck shot in your eye,
Ventilate your brain cap with my nine,
A little bit of black boot to your groin,
Don't try to let an agent take your form,
A little bit of parkour makes you miss,
It's like Hammer Time, you can't touch this,
A little bit C4 in the bag,
Explosion's so fake, makes me gag...

Bunch of peeps standing around... you call that a battle!? CHARGE IN AND WHACK THE SHIT OUT OF EACH OTHER!

To the dude with bruised balls. Wear a cup, or more properly, armor around the groin area. Cardboard just doesn't cut it.

To the dude who whacked the balls. Way to go Mr Nonchalant. LOL. Didn't even recognize the guys ball bashage as he screams like a girl and hops by.

Try to imagine yourself in the Cretaceous Period. You get your first look at this "six foot turkey" as you enter a clearing. He moves like a bird, lightly, bobbing his head. And you keep still because you think that maybe his visual acuity is based on movement like T-Rex – he'll lose you if you don't move. But no, not Turkeyraptor. You stare at him, and he just stares right back. And that's when the attack comes. Not from the front, but from the side, from the other two raptors you didn't even know were there. Because Turkeyraptor's a pack hunter, you see, he uses coordinated attack patterns and he is out in force today. And he slashes at you with this – a six-inch retractable claw, like a razor, on the middle toe. He doesn't bother to bite your jugular like a lion, oh no … he slashes at you here [makes slashing motions below child's chest] or here … [above the groin] or maybe across the belly, spilling your intestines. The point is … you are alive when they start to eat you. So you know … try to show a little respect.

3:03 groin says OUCH!

A: wearing a hoodie
B: wearing an undershirt thingy.

Round 1
0:00-0:10 - B tries several 1-2 combinations, but poor footwork and punching technique result in misses.
0:10-0:18 - A shows good distance control, but poor footwork leaves him backed against the door. Slipping and circling to his right would have been a better option.
0:18-0:27 - A and B both try to counter straight/wobbly right hands with their own right hands. Poor technique in general displayed by both. Establishing a stiff jab would have been a better option for both.
0:27-0:35 - Unable to land any strikes, both A and B separate and regroup. End of Round 1. 10-9 B for driveway control and generalship.
0:36-1:04 - Between rounds we get some back story to the confrontation which involves theft of illicit property. We also learn of A's prefight illness, and B's lack of compassion.

Round 2
1:03-1:08 - Clearly motivated, A comes out swinging, with B looking to counterstrike. B is smart to allow A to close distance rather than try to chase him down like in round 1.
1:08-1:13 - Drawing A in, B is able to counter a lunging right hand with a right hand of his own. Poor footwork by A combined with a quick followup shot by B leads to a knockdown.
1:13-1:18 - B tries to land punches before establishing a solid top position. A is able to sweep B with a quick roll. B should have concentrated on establishing his base first. 'Position before submission' is a better idea. A ends up securing side position.
1:18-1:35 - A shows excellent patience, as B expends too much energy attempting strikes from the inferior position. An armbar is available at 1:22, but A elects not to attempt it. The sequence ends with A executing a knee-over pass to full mount.
1:35-2:15 - A maintains mount, but B's lack of grappling is matched only by A's lack of conditioning. B removes A's hoodie. Multiple armbars are available, but A does not capitalize.
2:16-2:20 - B is able to execute a bump-and-roll (upa) sweep, landing in A's guard. A does well to control B's posture. An introductory lesson at their local Brazilian jiu jitsu school would have been a good option for both A and B.
2:20-3:07 - B tries landing strikes from the guard, but poor posture makes them ineffectual. A goes with an open guard, but a total lack of hip movement makes submissions unlikely. The sequence ends with an illegal groin strike.
3:07-4:12 - Too much talking. I have a feeling they may not be wearing the required mouth guards. At 3:27 a dog barks.
4:12-4:25 - A attempts an omoplata, but forgets to hook B's arm. This general lack of control allows B to strike A. A goes to turtle position.
4:25-4:37 - B attempts to take A's back, but does not secure the over/under or the hooks. As A stands up, B goes for an elevated (flying?) crucifix, but B counters it by dumping A on his head.
4:37-4:55 - With B on his back and A standing, A attempts multiple torino passes, but is unable to get to side position.
4:55-5:19 - Round 2 ends, but A shows a lack of sportsmanship by threatening to spit on B. 10-9 A.
Result: 19-19 Draw.

Note: I suspect this may not have been a sanctioned Amateur MMA event.

TL;DR: At 3:27 a dog barks.

Cheer up, goofus, it coulda been a groin holster.

>> ^chicchorea:

dupeage?


Pretty sure it's dupage