In response to the "Christians happened to have started the United States" line I looked up "puritans" on wikipedia and found this:

"The first Puritans of New England certainly disapproved of Christmas celebrations, as did some other Protestant churches of the time. Celebration was outlawed in Boston from 1659 to 1681. The ban was revoked in 1681 by an English-appointed governor Sir Edmund Andros, who also revoked a Puritan ban against festivities on Saturday night; but it was not until the mid 19th century that celebrating Christmas became fashionable in the Boston region.[32] Likewise the colonies banned many secular entertainments, such as games of chance, maypoles, and drama, on moral grounds."

always up for a run around the maypole.