Alright I might
Have had a little glare when I stared at ya ho
But I didn't know she was like that
She stared right back
My niggas warnin me that she was comin on to me
I react like a mack do I act cool
Just to test her cause I ain't no jester
I suggest her and her friend be outtie
Cause I don't want to make my pals get rowdy
And doubt me our friendship
But when lips touch
I go crazy in the clutch
Sorta like schitzo I forgets my bros and pals over gals
I didn't mean to but when you fiend you do
Strange things for the denim no matter who's in em
Grab a flooze then I'm in traffic
Don't laugh it might be your girl that I'm talkin about

Another incident when I went
Way beyond what I should of done
John should of stopped before them drawers dropped
But I didn't ain't no quittin
Really didn't care who's girl I was hittin
I admit skinz ain't a reason to lose friends
But then again I didn't know, sorry
Accept apologies and live on
Are we goin hold grudges well oh fudge
Its a new year and I do fear
Ya actions ya actin shy
I mean ya need to be smackin
That hoe
Instead of tryin to front on me ya know
Thats exactly how I'm goin to be ya know
I run my game on any G ya know
Cause we the most entertainin
I meant to blame women
For makin me do what the Ak seem to
When you call I screen you
I didn't mean to

Why do fools be schememin dreamin
Actin like demons
Niggas don't give a fuck
Because they beat shit
To many girls front cute
When they want loot
They tell lies the swell guys
Can peep it and thats weak shit
Thats why I run game on every freak I get
Born in Oakland grew up pumpin Too Short
I know the rules on the flooze so who's short
I once had a ho who smoked blunts yo
She tried to get me so I looked at the front door
And now shes not with me so forget it
But every once in a while I'll hit it
And it happened to be your girl
I didn't mean to and I been through
Your relationship and I hate dumb dips
But I really can't trip when they ride my tip
I didn't mean to

Obviously, the Scientology cult of Apple has been angered. But, yeah, maybe I am being too harsh, but I was trying to not go into too much detail when writing this. Let's just say, this isn't the first issue I've had with an Apple product, and this particular iPod was new when the first firmware update took it down that dark path.

The fifth generation iPods have been out for a while, and mine has been sitting in a drawer for a long time because it is simply a POS. I just recently dusted it off and tried to upgrade the firmware to 1.3 thinking maybe they shook the kinks out of the update, but of course it ruined my iPod for good. It was only a matter of time before I stabbed my knife blade through the screen.

Maybe I shouldn't post an anti-Apple post when I'm drinking sangria. Or maybe Apple can suck my ass. Also, you can read my earlier post against Mobile Me if you want to see the beginnings of my public outrage against Apple. There, too, the army of Dag was there to defend Apple's honor.

Upvote for trying to flush the drawer!

Well this girl came up to me - she says she's new in town
But the crew been said they seen her around
I thought they were right but I didn't wanna know
The girlie was Def and she wanted to go
I think her name is Lucy but they all call Loose
I think I thought I seen her on eighth and forty-deuce
The next think she said, "My place or yours?
Let's kick some bass behind closed doors!"
We got into the cab - the cab driver said
He recognized my girlie from the back of her head
He said a little something about tip to base
So I made him stop the cab to get out of the place
I shouldn't have looked back man I'll always regret it
Something's going on and I'll probably never get it
She was crying like a baby - stupid dumb
It's just too bad that girl's a bum

I spent my last dollar to by a Sabrett
When I seen this girl I could never forget
Now I like nothing better than a pretty girl smile
And I haven't seen a smile that pretty in a while
The girl came up to me she said she loved the show
Asked her to come home and she couldn't say, "No!"
We got the crib - there's Adam and D.
We didn't say a word - they just stared at me
I said, "I don't know her just met her tonight."
And Adrock started hiding everything in sight
D. pulled me over said, "Hid your gold,
The girl is crafty like ice is cold!"
The girl is crafty - she knows all the moves
I started playing records - she knew all the grooves
He thought she was a thief - and D. was right
But I just figured she'd spend the night
When I woke up late in the afternoon
She had taken all the things from inside his room
I found myself sleeping in the middle of the floor
She had taken the bed and the chest of drawers
The mirror, the TV, the guitar cord
My remote control and my old skateboard
She robbed us blind - she took all we owned
And the boys blamed me for bringing her hom

Sir:

Your generalization of both my actions and my intelligence is highly offensive. I demand that you refrain from further defamations of my character.

I refuse to believe that a simple picture of Adolf Hitler can be offensive. Otherwise you'd be burning textbooks and bombing the History Channel in protest. And even if it is offensive, it's only to you. That is not cause to remove my avatar, because maybe I'm offended by soccer players. And I recall you having an avatar of a soccer player once, which I could deem highly offensive...to me. But by your rules, I should be able to have your avatars removed, as well.

Since you have been the only one to complain to me about my avatar, I'll assume that the only "damage" I've caused to the Sift is to your easily-offended mentality. However, I don't cater to individuals, but to the Sift in general.

But I have a compromise. Since my Hitler avatar was deleted by the mods, I have altered it to make it funny, and thus no longer offensive.

Be kind to take note of it.

Good day, Sir.

In reply to this comment by campionidelmondo:
I don't agree with their avatars either, but you're taking it to another level, crossing any imaginary line that might have been there. You're prior actions on this site already suggested that you're not the sharpest knife in the drawer, so please realize that if you're doing this out of protest, or to "clevery" spotlight the flaw in choosing a hitler-ized avatar, your plan is completely backfiring and was foolish to begin with.

Apart from doing damage to this site, seeing as your avatar is featured on the front page due to one of your comments receiving +5 votes, I take personal offense to you posting messages on my videos and profile with your current avatar.

You probably have the most ironic nickname on this site by far.

In reply to this comment by thinker247:
I see. Please direct your complaint to the two moderators, dag and lucky760. You know, the ones with the Hitler avatars.

In reply to this comment by campionidelmondo:
Note: Use of an image containing offensive content and/or nudity
is strictly forbidden and may result in a permanent ban.

In reply to this comment by thinker247:
I fail to see your point.

In reply to this comment by campionidelmondo:
I don't care what inside joke prompted you to pick your current avatar, it's extremely offensive and chosen in very poor taste.

I don't agree with their avatars either, but you're taking it to another level, crossing any imaginary line that might have been there. You're prior actions on this site already suggested that you're not the sharpest knife in the drawer, so please realize that if you're doing this out of protest, or to "clevery" spotlight the flaw in choosing a hitler-ized avatar, your plan is completely backfiring and was foolish to begin with.

Apart from doing damage to this site, seeing as your avatar is featured on the front page due to one of your comments receiving +5 votes, I take personal offense to you posting messages on my videos and profile with your current avatar.

You probably have the most ironic nickname on this site by far.

In reply to this comment by thinker247:
I see. Please direct your complaint to the two moderators, dag and lucky760. You know, the ones with the Hitler avatars.

In reply to this comment by campionidelmondo:
Note: Use of an image containing offensive content and/or nudity
is strictly forbidden and may result in a permanent ban.

In reply to this comment by thinker247:
I fail to see your point.

In reply to this comment by campionidelmondo:
I don't care what inside joke prompted you to pick your current avatar, it's extremely offensive and chosen in very poor taste.

So the kid goes rummaging around in his mother's bedside drawer and finds... a hair dryer?

That's not what I found in MY Mom's drawer!

Is the oral sex head like a special attachment or what? Are they modular? Does it require special Japanese batteries? Does it fold up into the size of a matchbox and fit in my bottom drawer behind my socks? If so, will it smell like my socks? If there's a flood could it save my life? If so, do I get a discount on my insurance for having one?

I hear Bed Bath and Beyond now carries this guy as their new line of bottle openers.

It's a bitch to fit him in your silverware drawer, though.

>> ^videosiftbannedme:
I remember catching an episode of The New Candid Camera (late 1990's) and the setup was this: they had taken over an ice cream shop and put a sign on the register apologizing for not being able to give change. Then someone would come in, order two cones, hand them $5 and Allen Funt, Jr. would put the money in the till, shut the drawer and wait. As you can all see where this is going, people wanted their change and he kindly explained that they don't give change. And of course people were getting upset.
All except one guy.
He comes in, pays for his cone, doesn't get his money back and stands there calmly eating his cone. Funt Jr., not seeing any reaction, tries to assuage the guy by explaining that they don't give change. "Cool..." the guys says. Funt Jr. tries again to provoke a reaction. Nothing. So finally he breaks down, admits to the guy that it's Candid Camera, they caught him, yuk yuk yuk, etc. Intrested, Funt Jr. pursues the guy in his questioning, asking why he didn't get upset. And to this day, I'll never forget what the customer's answer was:
"Yeah, I don't let stuff like that rent space in my head." Fucking brilliant. Because that's what stuff like this does. It just rents space in your head. Until the next thing comes along.
Be smarter than the drama. Leave it on the stage where it belongs.


Don't let the amygdala rule your mind. It will make bad decisions for you. What you first feel in reaction to something is not always the right feeling, step out of yourself, and so as to make better decisions.

I remember catching an episode of The New Candid Camera (late 1990's) and the setup was this: they had taken over an ice cream shop and put a sign on the register apologizing for not being able to give change. Then someone would come in, order two cones, hand them $5 and Allen Funt, Jr. would put the money in the till, shut the drawer and wait. As you can all see where this is going, people wanted their change and he kindly explained that they don't give change. And of course people were getting upset.

All except one guy.

He comes in, pays for his cone, doesn't get his money back and stands there calmly eating his cone. Funt Jr., not seeing any reaction, tries to assuage the guy by explaining that they don't give change. "Cool..." the guys says. Funt Jr. tries again to provoke a reaction. Nothing. So finally he breaks down, admits to the guy that it's Candid Camera, they caught him, yuk yuk yuk, etc. Intrested, Funt Jr. pursues the guy in his questioning, asking why he didn't get upset. And to this day, I'll never forget what the customer's answer was:

"Yeah, I don't let stuff like that rent space in my head." Fucking brilliant. Because that's what stuff like this does. It just rents space in your head. Until the next thing comes along.

Be smarter than the drama. Leave it on the stage where it belongs.

>> ^Retroboy:
>> ^Hyperdrive:
I'm happy enough to live without any drawers.

er... just don't go out in public without 'em, k?
It's quite invigorating, once you get used to the funny looks.

His drawers with "ALL BULLSHiT" written on 'em had me giggling.

>> ^Hyperdrive:
I'm happy enough to live without any drawers.

er... just don't go out in public without 'em, k?

Seriously though, this was nothing less than an excellently made advert for christianity, and no one realises it!

Seriously! The first guy he met with a different cupboard? Horizontal black and white. That's right, he places BLACK (devil) and WHITE (god) on the same level! They both show up at Sanjeev's house wearing identical suits, clearly indicating overtones of the sterile perfection in "Equilibrium". He's got a microwave on his dressing table, clearly used to torture small animals. He tells Sanjeev that "if you want you can borrow my manual" and what does Sanjeev do? That's right, he flips out, starts talking in tongues, he's clearly possessed by some sort of demon.

He goes round to his uncle's and he sees a purple drawer. The colour of the tempest, bringing disarray and wild commotion into his life. It's clearly the colour of the dreaded gay. Calling up his nephew to play football? Sounds like a paedophile to me.

So he builds his own cupboard, and we see the inevitable result - he has become such a twisted terrible person that people are disgusted by his presence. Shunned by his own family and strangers on the street he takes to mindless acts of violence. He experiments with cupboards, makes a deformed monstrosity which the devil compells him to destroy and finally settles on a cupboard with all the colours OF THE GAY FLAG. He puts his own cupboard on a public walkway to try and advertise his travesty to others, and when someone trips over his cupboard, he kicks theirs into a river. Vandal. Probably raped one of those girls too.

Eventually the sad ending to the story, he begins to disregard and disrespect his parents even more, he's beyond help. They probably got him a little starter cupboard set from matalan but he didn't care. You can clearly see him locking them in a devilish prison made from their own cupboards at 6:56. They become old and die in this prison and never see the light of day again. He keeps a picture of them on his GAY CUPBOARD for ever more, torturing their restless souls which were never allowed to find peace.

Then he showed all of his gay friends.

Christianity, guys, it fucking works.