About time such scanners are introduced. Terrorists trying to board the planes with explosives and ceramic blades, everywhere you look. Just yesterday, a group of 27 terrorists tried to hijack a Cessna by overpowering the pilots with their genital piercings. With this new technology, they wouldn't have gotten onto the airplane.

But how long until they finally invent a method to remove all bodily fluids and gases? It's completely unacceptable that you can still get aboard with a bowel filled with sarin gas.

Our Precious Bodily Fluids are being extracted, Jack D. Ripper's fears are being brought to fruition.

I'm very happy I didn't visit any pr0n 2.0 sites an hour earlier; I've retained enough bodily fluid to shed a tear.

This tribute reminds me of the time a puzzled Beast-Man, saved from falling off a cliff says, "Why did you rescue me, He-Man? I wouldn't have done the same for you."

The answer to Beast-Man's query comes from the hearts of Videosifters ("liberalsift, athesift," et al) and that answer is you are all as gracious and powerful as He-Man, only slightly more handsome, certainly twice as dumb. Beast-Man will be back next week to raise havoc. In the meantime, I love you all for the purest, most sinister reason: I have no choice.

Damn your charms!

May Darwin, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, the ghosts of Lenin, Lennon and Karl and Groucho Marx bless you all and this site.

KUCINICH/NADER 2012

Oldie (by internet standards) but goldie. Also NSFW.

Bodily fluids disaster story


"I originally wrote this story as a reply in one of those "funny drinking stories" threads a couple of months ago. It is a very embarrassing story about me when I was a stupid teenager, not that much different from a lot of people's drinking stories, but with a twist of lemon. Lots of people seemed to like it, so I thought I would illustrate and narrate the story in its own thread for maximum hilarity.

This all happened when I was 18 years old. I had dropped out of highschool twice by this point, ditched a lot of my friends because I was a selfish idiot and generally didn't give a gently caress about anything. I hardly ever ate anything and was skinny as gently caress, showered maybe once every three days, took a poo poo load of drugs and smoked like a chimney. I didn't have any prospects for the future. I just followed every impulse I had. I stole hundreds of dollars of stuff from the gas station I worked at. I stole poo poo from my parents. I shop lifted. I'm sure lots of people have been through a phase like this and I feel very sorry for all of you.

Basically, I was a creepy, disgusting and smelly gently caress that almost no one would ever let their daughter be friends with. Upon getting to know me, you would probably never want to see me again. (...) Continue reading"

You cant tell in the majority of videos posted by people if some one died, in the sift.

If the viewers have a visceral gut reaction to something that almost causes you to wretch, then you know its gone to far.



However in some youtube videos you can.

Search "f1 hits man" you will find the video, which is a documentary, however it does fit the sift snuff policy.

I submit that videos such as this fit the description of snuff, as defined by the Sift Guidelines.

Warning if you click on the link and watch the video I am not to be held liable for your reaction. Enter at your own risk. NOTE THIS LINK DOES NOT TAKE YOU TO THE VIDEO IT SELF. ONLY THE YOUTUBE SEARCH PAGE, THAT SHOWS THE NUMBER OF EMBEDS.
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_type=&search_query=f1+hits+man&aq=1&oq=f1+hits+

This link depicts the accident that killed Tom Pryce
There was an accident on the F1 Track. Causing the Race Marshals to come onto the track to put out a fire. One of the marshals carrying a fire extinguisher doesn't clear Tom Pryce's car. The marshal is torn up very badly, and the fire extinguisher kills Tom Pryce's. This footage is news worthy's, but extremely egregious.

Then there are videos that depict hockey players who have had their large blood vessels severed to music. That violates the policy, because it places no context on the situation. Only revels in the spilling of bodily fluids to music.

People have trouble interpreting risk. Even if there is a link to autism, which is rare at any rate, how does that compare to nobody being vaccinated? Vaccinations aren't only for you, they're for everyone around you too. A way to look at it is people who don't want their children vaccinated for fear of autism, but rely on everyone else's children being vaccinated to prevent their child from contracting a nasty disease that they might otherwise avoid.

Maybe it's the fluoridation sapping and impurifying our precious bodily fluids. Yes. That seems more likely.

Some make up and soaps shows up under black light - so this is much more likely woman goo.

Also, I don't think bodily fluids fluoresce under black light without being treated first.

Sincerely,
Buzz Killington

Flouridation, Mandrake. They are sapping our precious bodily fluids.

I'd much rather keep the P-voters so they don't go and sift any random crap they can just to be able to vote again. THAT would surely be sapping our bodily fluids.

So what if a video gets lots of votes from being linked and emailed around the office? It doesn't affect us negatively in the least. If we get even one decent person out of the hundreds signing up to stay and become a regular, wouldn't that count as an overall win? That definately wouldn't happen if they had to wait a week to vote or had to sift something, anything, first.
Why not remove the user ranking system while we're at it? That would surely ruin the incentive of people spitting out sifts by the minute for the sole purpose of getting a better rank, which could be seen as yet another avenue of sift dilution.

*beg. Upvote this video, or the Communists will fluoridate your bodily fluids.

I'm currently losing some of my precious bodily fluids looking at thepinky's avatar...

>> ^schmawy:
P.O.E.


http://www.purityofessence.org/

I've seen another one where by the time he gets out the guy has covered himself and the entire elevator in various bodily fluids.

Found it:
http://www.videosift.com/video/Trapped-in-an-Elevator-for-40-Hours-with-diarrhea

Feddy....you were the first siftquisition, lighten up bud??...Free-association is how you roll sometimes, eh??? My mind works in a similar fashion, we juxtapose brother, take another bong load....


Ok, the self-appointed arbiter has taken the reigns, good on him-I say the shitfucks die in a pool of their own commingled bodily fluids, but hey, that would not be fair. My votes' ban, if they(he, she, it) can't come up with a better defense.....than simply, "Yo man...but....and then...and but I..."

Come on fellas', come clean or deliver closing arguments, and we'll make more rules we can fuck the next posers with, thanks for the primmer, bob's yer fucking babysitter!!!

Place choggie's preliminary torch on the hut, in the ban column.
-edit -Fed?? How did you get dragged into this??....Yer whining about having gone through scrutiny of the same, every time you are able, when you whipped out yer pecker, that's why too....

Must protect our precious bodily fluids.