@eric3579, here is a transcript. So you can get the info without the annoying delivery:


And finally, New Rule: there are scandals, and then there are scandals. And perspective is important. Yes, to explain Benghazi, Susan Rice used talking points. But at least she didn't have to read them off her hand! [graphic of Palin looking into her palm]

Now this week, someone was taken off a cross-country flight in handcuffs for singing "I Will Always Love You" for three straight hours. And that's still fewer times has said "Benghazi". I've seen this woman [Megyn Kelly] say Benghazi on my TV so many times, I don't know if it's a problem with the set, or I'm in an Asian horror movie, and there's a monster named Benghazi.

Congressman and friend of Real Time Darrell Issa is the Chairman of the Oversight Committee, and as most Californians know, he made his fortune in car alarms. And now, ironically, has become a loud, repetitive, but ultimately pointless device that you wish to God someone would shut off so you could get some sleep. (audience applause)

But here's the difference between Darrell Issa and a car alarm. Sometimes when a car alarm goes off, there's an actual crime. I keep looking for the crime here, I feel like Reese Witherspoon arguing with the cop. Why are you arresting me? Susan Rice said "mob" instead of "al-Qaeda"? Obama said "act of terror" instead of "terrorist act"?

Republicans are constantly coming up with these never before stated secret rules, that they only tell you about once you've broken them.

"You don't make important speeches from a teleprompter!"

OK.

"No golfing until we have a budget!"

All right.

"Thou shalt not criticize the President when he's on foreign soil, unless he's a Democrat, of course, then it's OK."

Congressman Peter King thundered that the President was almost four minutes into his first Benghazi statement before he mentioned an act of terror! Ah yes, the four-minute rule. Fuck, how could I forget?!

'Scuse me, Nixon ran a burglary ring out of the Oval Office. Reagan traded arms with terrorists. Bush ginned up a war where thousands died by sending Colin Powell to lie to the UN with props, remember that? He turned an American hero into General Carrot Top! But I let it go. I said this is the business we've chosen.

But please, don't tell me that freedom died because Susan Rice broke the scared bond between citizens and talk shows. In a poll this week, 4 in 10 Republicans said Benghazi is the worst scandal in American history. Second worst? Kanye West snatching the mic from Taylor Swift.

If you think Benghazi is worse than slavery, the Trail of Tears, Japanese internment, Tuskegee, purposefully injecting Guatemalan mental patients with syphilis, lying about WMDs, and the fact that banks today are still foreclosing on mortgages they don't own, then your hard-on for Obama has lasted more than four hours, and you need to call a doctor. (wild audience cheering and applause)

And while the press has been occupied with scandal, the biggest scandal, and the most important story of the century so far, happened last week. Scientists reported that the level of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere has passed the long-feared milestone of 400 parts per million. And unless you're a chimney sweep, that's bad news. Because humans have never lived through it.

You think Susan Rice gave bogus talking points about Benghazi? What about the bullshit talking points the entire Republican Party has been spewing on climate change since the 90s? (audience applause)

I wanna see the e-mails to find out who came up with the talking points that global warming is just a theory, and that it needs more study, and climate change is a hoax. The Obama administration isn't dirty, the air is.

Last year I was using famous speeches to teach English here in Thailand. One that I chose was JFK's "We Choose to go to the Moon" speech, so I remember that some of the words that followed the titular ones were "we choose to go to the moon in this decade".

I guess what I'm saying is, JFK couldn't have been 100% certain that whoever his predecessor would be would actually keep up that torch, but it was still a worthy goal and a worthy speech. Maybe (probably) Obama's speech mentioning going to Mars by the 2030's won't have that sort of impact, but it's a start and better than nothing.

After all, I think that we'd like to look back and give JFK more credit for getting us to the moon than "tricky Dick" Nixon, who ended up being the actual sitting president when we did get to the moon. And within the decade, just as JFK had said!

Hey argument mongers! YEAH YOUSE! This is a great video so why don't we respect it and resist the temptation to turn this into another gun rights flame war (incidentally, another war that cannot be "won"). There is a place for that discussion and it's not here. Move along. Theenks.

I love when retired police officers step forward and slowly rip apart the drug war with facts, experience and wisdom. Seems the sad truth is that the U.S. government, (which is currently in the habit of displaying a level of insanity fit for a corporate-emperor-giant-king via what it says to the public versus what it actually does in its slowly eroding privacy) clearly doesn't seem to actually want to end the drug war or the war on terror for that matter any time soon. i guess there is too much profit to be had from the institutions that are already in place at this point.

With luck, the Nixon/Reagan-esque dinosaurs of free will control, hiding behind the thin guise of morality, which they surely are not the paragons of, will soon be trapped within their sedimentary prison for all time and We the people will be able to choose what kind of substances we ingest without the looming shadow of silent oppression casting its all encompassing umbra upon us.

Although he was wrong about JFK and Nixon...let's give this a shot!

No sir, empathy and tolerance go hand-in-hand, I'm not a fucking out-of-touch dinosaur- I ALSO recognize that racism is an issue that garners that gut-reaction simply from seeing the word typed or written on a page with certain types of peeps too distracted by ancillary clap-trap (pretentious, insincere, or empty verbiage) to have any effect whatsoever on the world of the "real", whatever one perceives that to be.

I see Colin Powell's talk of racism in the republican party as a complete non-issue as in, "Why should I give a fuck about this Uncle Tom, proverbial, "house-nigger" who acted anything like a general or statesman when he addressed the U.N. in a rambling justification for bankrupting the country into the Gulf War(s)-He should regret his actions under Bush and go fuck himself into obscurity and stay the fuck out of politics forever, kinna like Nixon when he bellied-up and bailed-out before impeachment, and was subsequently pardoned by that OTHER ineffectual tool, Gerald Ford.

http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2012/06/13/colin-powell-regrets-u-n-speech-justifying-the-iraq-invasion/

The fantasy world I speak of you refuse to consider though under your nose where it rests and obfuscates world view.

The New World Order is happening, it's the mechanism of disinformation, obfuscation, world economic manipulation, etc, that has you right where you don't want to be, a willing slave, complicit in the breakdown of human societies worldwide. Welcome to the Matrix Wendy, enjoy your preoccupation with guns, racism, and voting booths


Oh, and for the record once again, I am apolitical and believe the parties democrat and republican interchangeable, and the equally meaningless terminology of political discourse in light of the fistfuck being perpetrated on all nations of the world, a complete and pathetic distraction.
The goddamn whore of Babylon wants your mind, money, and muscle and you're standing in line to be first on the train, in my , "fantastic" world of illusion.

Lyrics:
Im gonna smoke some weed, only got 20 dollas in my pocket
Imma huntin, looking for a pot shop, this is fucking awesome!

Walk into my house like what up, i got some good pot
I'm just pumped up got some herb from the pot shop
Ice in my fridge it used to be frosty
My friends like "Damn, that's a stoned ass donkey!"
Rollin' in hella high, looking like it's fifa time
Dominating all my friends, as I eat some chili fries
Draped in a snuggie with my girl sitting next to me
Probably shouldn't have had a big gulp full of ice tea
PISS!
But shit it was 99 cents!

I be blazin and smokin it
Bout to go and get some munchie snacks, passing up on those cracker jacks
Reeces Pieces are where it's at, Gotta get me some soda pop
Cotton mouth has been creeping up
But can't remember where I put my keys,
Yeah, that's what's up.
Imma take your grandpa's ride, Imma take your grandpa's ride
No for real, ask your grandpa, Can I take his 65?
Deville Cruisin to my local Publix
Nothing better than rolling with 2 super fly chicks!
They had frozen burritos, I bought frozen burritos
I bought some Ben and Jerry's, then I bought some Cheetos
Hello, Hello, my main man Obama
A couple states have just reformed their laws on marijuana
Whatcha gonna do, send the feds there? Hell no!
The DEA's would be like "Ah, they got Volcano"

What you know about the science of marijuana?
What you know about people suffering from glaucoma?
They need it, they need it, it helps them with their condition
If don't believe me, then just ask some eye physicians
Thank your granddad for voting for that guy Richard
Nixon is the President who made the plant illegal
But science is now showing that its medicine for people
And the private sector's fighting to keep all of that illegal
Alcohol and Tobacco, Pharmaceutical, Prisons
I'll take those four major lobby groups and fight those motherfuckers
They making money day and night, all those motherfuckers
And bribing congress out of sight, all those motherfuckers
They be like, "Oh, it's immoral and unhealthy"
I'm like how many people are you making wealthy
Anti-marijuana lobbies are making all kinds of profits
And they don't want you to stop it cause of all the special interests
I call that getting swindled and pimped, shit
I call that getting tricked by the government, that law's hella old
So its time to update it, regulate it, and then get it under state control
Peep Game, look into my political telescope
Think it's going to stay like this forever, nah, it hella won't, nah, it hella won't.

Let's end the war on drugs, It's time to pull the plug
These special interest groups are nothing more than corporate thugs
Let's end the war on weed, the people have agreed.
These special interest groups have kept these laws with bribery

Imma smoke some weed, only got 20 dollas in my pocket
Imma huntin, looking for a pot shop, this is fucking awesome!

Fun fact...Nixon was our last Liberal president. You don't learn shit in school kids

*promote I want a Nixon weather vane!

"At any rate, I certainly wouldn't harm the child" - Nixon's head 3003 A.D.

Tags for this video have been changed from 'nixon, car accident, wife, daughter, biden, 1972, condolence call' to 'nixon, car accident, wife, daughter, biden, 1972, condolence call, uhhh' - edited by calvados

You forgot speechwriter and lawyer for Presidents Nixon and Ford.>> ^Payback:

Ben Stein.
Stand Up Comic.
Comedic Movie Bit Player.
Game Show Host.
Economist?
Say what?
Jerry Seinfeld
Stand Up Comic.
TV Personality.
Billionaire.
Dental Assistant?

"Mitt never let our national security get so lax the red chinese swooped in and stole our missile guidance tech." Nixon (R - crook) opened China.

Isn't that what liberals want--"dialogue" with our enemies? Nixon also created the EPA. Pobody's nerfect. The 'crook' who had no knowledge of Watergate and never ordered it, but still stepped down, unlike Slick Willie the convicted felon. Nixon is a statesman by comparison to both Bubba AND Obozo.

"Mitt didn't built bureaucratic walls between law enforcement agencies to hide his own crimes." Bush II (R - derp) built the Homeland Security Department which helped the CIA cover up crimes of torture.

You mean the guy with higher test scores than Kerry? By international law tis only a crime to torture recognized enemy soldiers of an actual nation, not IED-laying sh1tbag terrorists. If it saves American lives, I'm for torturing every last one of them.

"Mitt didn't tell subordinate women, 'Suck this or lose your job'" Clarence Thomas (R- Koch Ind.) did.

Hearsay and bullshit, rebuked testimony, no charges filed. Nice try, though! Nothing brings out the racist in a liberal like a Black conservative, who by the way, is an intellectual giant compared to Obozo's recent affirmative action twins. Oh, and Thomas was never accused of rape like bubba.

I know pointing out facts won't deter qm, it's just fun to show him up as an ill informed redneck.

Facts? Where? Oh, was that your version of facts? You've failed in your mission. Utterly. I expected less--much less--from a liberal. And you delivered. Let me know when you want another keyboard beating.










>> ^Boise_Lib:

>> ^quantumushroom:
Mitt never let our national security get so lax the red chinese swooped in and stole our missile guidance tech. Mitt didn't built bureaucratic walls between law enforcement agencies to hide his own crimes. Mitt didn't lie under oath, which for you and me would mean serious prison time. Mitt never cheated on his wife. Mitt was never disbarred and disgraced. Mitt didn't tell subordinate women, "Suck this or lose your job", and if Mitt did any of these things, he sure wouldn't have in-the-tank, subservient media shills covering his ass like they did this clown.

"Mitt never let our national security get so lax the red chinese swooped in and stole our missile guidance tech." Nixon (R - crook) opened China.

"Mitt didn't built bureaucratic walls between law enforcement agencies to hide his own crimes." Bush II (R - derp) built the Homeland Security Department which helped the CIA cover up crimes of torture.
"Mitt didn't tell subordinate women, 'Suck this or lose your job'" Clarence Thomas (R- Koch Ind.) did.
I know pointing out facts won't deter qm, it's just fun to show him up as an ill informed redneck.

>> ^quantumushroom:

Mitt never let our national security get so lax the red chinese swooped in and stole our missile guidance tech. Mitt didn't built bureaucratic walls between law enforcement agencies to hide his own crimes. Mitt didn't lie under oath, which for you and me would mean serious prison time. Mitt never cheated on his wife. Mitt was never disbarred and disgraced. Mitt didn't tell subordinate women, "Suck this or lose your job", and if Mitt did any of these things, he sure wouldn't have in-the-tank, subservient media shills covering his ass like they did this clown.

"Mitt never let our national security get so lax the red chinese swooped in and stole our missile guidance tech." Nixon (R - crook) opened China.


"Mitt didn't built bureaucratic walls between law enforcement agencies to hide his own crimes." Bush II (R - derp) built the Homeland Security Department which helped the CIA cover up crimes of torture.

"Mitt didn't tell subordinate women, 'Suck this or lose your job'" Clarence Thomas (R- Koch Ind.) did.

I know pointing out facts won't deter qm, it's just fun to show him up as an ill informed redneck.

Republicans like to put charismatic blank slates at the top of the ticket: Reagan, Bush 2 and Romney.

They seem to run into more problems when they put thinkers at the top of the ticket: Nixon, Bush 1, Dole and John McCain.

>> ^VoodooV:

I think Bill Maher is exactly right. He wants to be the first Mormon president...that's the long and the short of it.
Governing? whatever
bipartisanship? whatever
It explains perfectly why he is able to shift positions so drastically. HE DOESNT CARE! He's not a republican, he's not a centrist, he's not a democrat. He just wants to be able to say he was the first mormon president.