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Abbott and Costello Buy A Computer

If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their famous sketch, "Who's on First?" might have turned out something like this:



Costello calls to buy a computer from Abbott


Abbott: "Super Duper computer store. May I help you?



Costello: "Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer."



Abbott: "Mac?"



Costello: "No, the name's Lou."

Abbott: "Your computer?"

Costello: "I don't own a computer. I want to buy one."

Abbott: "Mac?"

Costello: "I told you, my name's Lou."

Abbott: "What about Windows?"

Costello: "Why? Will it get stuffy in here?"

Abbott: "Do you want a computer with Windows?"

Costello: "I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?"

Abbott: "Wallpaper."

Costello: "Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software."

Abbott: "Software for Windows?"

Costello: "No. On the Computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?"

Abbott: "Office."

Costello: "Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?"

Abbott: "I just did."

Costello: "You just did what?"

Abbott: "Recommend something."

Costello: "You recommended something?"

Abbott: "Yes."

Costello: "For my office?"

Abbott: "Yes."

Costello: "OK, what did you recommend for my office?"

Abbott: "Office."

Costello: "Yes! For my office!"

Abbott: "I recommend Office with Windows."

Costello: "I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?"

Abbott: "Word."

Costello: "What word?"

Abbott: "Word in Office."

Costello: "The only word in office is office.!"

Abbott: "The Word in Office for Windows."

Costello: "Which word in office for windows?"

Abbott: "The Word you get when you click the blue 'W.'"

Costello: "I'm going to click your blue 'W' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?"

Abbott: "Money."

Costello: "That's right. What do you have?"

Abbott: "Money."

Costello: "I need money to track my money?"

Abbott: "It comes bundled with your computer."

Costello: "What's bundled with my computer?"

Abbott: "Money."

Costello: "Money comes with my computer?"

Abbott: "Yes. At no extra charge."

Abbott: ""One copy."

Costello: "Isn't it illegal to copy money?"

Abbott: "Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money."

Costello: "They can give you a license to copy money?"

Abbott: "Why not? THEY OWN IT!"

(A few days later)

Abbott: "Super Duper computer store. May I help you?"

Costello: "How do I turn my computer off?"

Abbott: "Click on 'START'……"

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