And American Cheese (Velveeta, Singles, Cheese whiz etc.) is not cheese, they have none of the bacterial culture that makes up cheese.
So they call it "Processed Cheese Food"

Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

The song's fine but the little acting bits- really makes me not want to watch this show. It's a big yellow slice of Velveeta®

I made a chess set out of Velveeta, Ritz crackers, and Jimmy Dean sausage.
It was delicious.

I think this might be a self post, too. Joined and posted on the same day. I guess it doesn't really matter. The guy is talented, even though I didn't like the song either.

In reply to this comment by dag:
Nicely done, but I wish it wasn't processed with so many effects. Processed music is like processed cheese - and the difference between Velveeta® and a fine Edam.

Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

Nicely done, but I wish it wasn't processed with so many effects. Processed music is like processed cheese - and the difference between Velveeta® and a fine Edam.

Oh, I see…

Well, since some of you seem to have attended the Fred Rogers school of comedy, I’ll try to put it in a more friendly, less sarcastic light:

Although pre-grated cheese is widely popular with the discerning American public(I’m not sure about other countries), I think the general consensus among food bloggers and websites is that pre-grated cheese loses a lot of flavor. Not to mention the fact that buying it whole is more economical, and whole cheeses don’t contain the usual anti-caking ingredients or extra preservatives of most grated varieties.

http://www.thenibble.com/reviews/main/cheese/cheese2/whey/grating-cheeses2.asp
http://www.beforeourtime.com/2009/04/cheese-that-grates-on-me.html
http://cheaphealthygood.blogspot.com/2009/08/save-money-on-food-buy-it-whole-rather.html

Now, call me old fashioned, but I’m a person who likes to save money. I wouldn’t pay twice the price for gas just to have someone pump it for me. Nor would I pay a home nurse to wash me just because I find it difficult to bathe myself. Even though it can be hard, I still have full use of my arms and brain, so I find I can do pretty well on my own with a washrag or lather sponge.

That said, there are some occasions where I do consider buying pre-grated cheese. For instance, many brands offer the “Mexican Four Cheese Blend” variety. And I find myself thinking, “That’s great! I can’t possibly use four different, whole blocks of cheese on one Mex-a-roni casserole. And if I just overlook the fact that most of these cheeses like ‘Monterey Jack‘, ‘Pepper Jack‘, and ‘Cheddar’ aren’t actually served anywhere in Mexico, I can create quite the tasty impression of a suburban, chipotle abortion in no time. And to make it even easier, Taco Bell now sells mild sauce IN-THE-STORE! Just one aisle over!!!”

Also, I’m willing to accept the idea that some people just have a hard time grating cheese themselves. I started doing it when I was four, to help my mother out in the kitchen, so sometimes I overlook the fact that some people just might not know how. That’s why I’ve included the links below.

http://www.bonappetit.com/tipstools/tips/2008/04/how_to_grate_cheese
http://www.wikihow.com/Grate-Cheese

Now, these might not get you all the way there. So a few tips of my own are:

1. Try to grate the cheese in one direction only. Against the teeth. This will prevent the unnecessary action of sliding the cheese up the grater the wrong way.

2. Always wash the grater immediately. Unlike mayonnaise, Velveeta and French-fry grease, cheese will start to harden-up after a short period of time and become difficult to wash off.

Give it a shot. With a little hard work you’ll be grating cheese in no time flat. I don’t know about you, but I’ll be saving the extra money to go see the American version of “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo” at the IMAX.

Yeah, Stanley Steamer almost kills Leno? That's nothing -- this morning's Cleavland Steamer damn near killed me! Last time I ever eat a load of Velveeta and a pound of unshelled sunflower seeds on a drunken dare!

Holy crap, it's like a Velveeta I.V. drip.

It sounds best steamed and covered with melted Velveeta.

the soup is surprisingly tasty, especially with the sausage and shitakes. Your recipe, on the other hand choggie... um... no thanks. I have cooked with velveeta once or twice when Soupskin has brought some home (he has a chili dip that he insists on using velveeta for) but honestly, its hard to surpress a shudder when I even think of the stuff. Barbeque flavored rice? Iceberg lettuce? uh.. no thanks. You enjoy that....

I'm not even sure what to make of that.

In reply to this comment by choggie:
My god that concoction, I am sorry, sounds like it belongs in the Eternal Bachelor's Armchair Quarterback Cookbook....can I use it??? It would be a goodd companion to this one:

Frank-o-Roni Bowls

1 package of Frankfurters
2 boxes of Rice-o-Roni Barbeque Flavored Wild Rice
4 heads of Iceburg Lettuce
1 cup Velveeta Cheese


With a pint glass taken home from your favorite pub, cut a hole of lettuce out of each head, to make a hollow space in the center....discard cut-out

Cut franks into 1/2 inch pieces, and place in bowl in microwave for 1 minute, until frank pieces swell and pop (look into microwave while cooking, some will pop and splatter, it's fun!!)

Prepare rice per instructions on package.

Mix frankies and rice-O-Roni and fill lettuce bowls.

Melt Velveeta in microwave, and pour over bowls.

serves you and three hungry fans

My god that concoction, I am sorry, sounds like it belongs in the Eternal Bachelor's Armchair Quarterback Cookbook....can I use it??? It would be a goodd companion to this one:

Frank-o-Roni Bowls

1 package of Frankfurters
2 boxes of Rice-o-Roni Barbeque Flavored Wild Rice
4 heads of Iceburg Lettuce
1 cup Velveeta Cheese


With a pint glass taken home from your favorite pub, cut a hole of lettuce out of each head, to make a hollow space in the center....discard cut-out

Cut franks into 1/2 inch pieces, and place in bowl in microwave for 1 minute, until frank pieces swell and pop (look into microwave while cooking, some will pop and splatter, it's fun!!)

Prepare rice per instructions on package.

Mix frankies and rice-O-Roni and fill lettuce bowls.

Melt Velveeta in microwave, and pour over bowls.

serves you and three hungry fans

I put nutmeg into all cream-based sauces and soups... it's just a favorite of mine. If you put it in at the beginning and only use a little spot of it (probably 1/4 teaspoon would be fine) it brings a "homey" feel to the dish and brings out the sweetness which in the case of cream bases is a nice rounding out. I too wouldn't use Velveeta but the only replacement in this case would be cheddar or bleu because hard cheeses need to be added slowly and at high temperature in order to fuse properly. In this recipe, hard cheese (Parmesan, Romano, Gruyere, Asiago) would most likely stay seperate in the dish and coat the bottom of the pot. Not only that but I'd suspect it would take over teh flavor of the soup. A bit (1/2 cup?) of cheddar or bleu might be a nice addition though.

"...an in other news closer to th' crib, head-on collisions in Detroit, have finally given up the throne, to the hit-and-run, street racers, with pedestrian near misses, stayin' straight at 23 persent!"
'Hehe heh heh Velveeta, who the FUCK, is stupid enough to walk.....Goddamn pedestrians!!"