You had a piece of chocolate shoved up your ass while you were sleeping? Sexual harrassment!!

You had a piece of chocolate shoved up your ass by Kate Beckinsale while you were sleeping? Lucky bastard.

Emilia Clarke - 29 years old, looks 18

Kate Beckinsale - 42 years old, looks 29

Geo blocked in Canada, alternative URL:
http://teamcoco.com/video/kate-miccuci-shocking-songs

Kate Mckinnon ... truly and undeniably a star. Thank you for the promote.

*promote (got me by 5 min)

When a man doesn’t love a woman very very much
He signs away his paternal rights and jizzes in a cup
Then with lots of money and scientific genius
Hormones, pain and of course, um… Jesus

The process begins the way god intended
With a transvaginal ultrasound
With a wand longer than a ukulele
When it comes out of my body, it makes this sound (pop)

I give myself daily intradermal injections
An acute blood thinner and estrogen concurrence
Cryopreservation through hormonal activation
And none of it’s covered by insurance

Then I’m knocked out and you’re removed
And combined with a stranger’s come
And as the saying goes
You win some, you lose some/you dispose of the defective ones in a hazardous waste bin

And then you’re frozen until I’m certain
It’s time to unthaw you into a person
Then you’ll expire or you’ll make the grade
And that, my darling, that’s how babies are made
(It’s so easy and natural)

CHORUS:
Hush little egg baby don’t say a word
Mama’s gonna freeze you til she gets rich

And when that day finally arrives
You’ll be constructed in a petri dish
With sperm donor 8w6-3
The silent partner of our family

So hush little egg baby don’t be sad
Just because I never fucked your dad

VERSE 2:
I know there are orphans everywhere
But I’m going to pretend that isn’t real
Don’t look at me like that just cause I admit it
You had kids and you knew the deal

Yeah I feel guilty about overpopulation
And ruining the environment for forever
But Osama Bin Laden had 20 kids
So fuck you or whatever

Sadly procreation is not a meritocracy
And we need to prevent a real life Idiocracy
Though it may be the ultimate form of narcissism
It’s also a way to re-reverse reverse Darwinism

Gonna mute the sound of that ticking clock
I just need the sperm now I don’t need the cock
My ovaries are like hey girl I’m over here
And I’m all like shhhh

I want all the stuff I don’t need a bucket list
It doesn’t make me greedy it just makes me feminist
Now I’m thinking back through all the guys I’ve dated
If they heard this song they’d fucking hate it

CHORUS:
Hush little egg baby don’t you cry
You’ll have the best genes mommy can buy

I don’t want to wait until I get in dire straights
My friends say if I want kids I should go out on some dates
But these working bitches don’t have time to leave it to the fates
The world deserves more Riki’s and the world deserves more Kate’s

So hush little egg baby dad’s are overrated
He did what mattered when he masturbated

BRIDGE:
Hush little egg baby just hold firm
Mama’s gonna buy you designer sperm

And if that sperm gives you random traits
Mama’s gonna test your dna

And if your dna doesn’t make things clear
Mama’s gonna just have to live in fear

And if that fear turns into guilt
Mama’s gonna hold onto what we built

And if I hold too tight as to suffocate
I’ll buy you lots of things to overcompensate

And if that overcompensation’s too transparent
I’ll pretend it’s somehow better with no male parent

And if you say but mom who’s my dad
I’ll say I don’t know and it’s just too bad

And if that badness forms a hole in your heart
I’ll want to make it up to you but won’t know where to start

I’ll probably start by saying it’s just you and me
And there’s no such thing as a normal family

So fuck being normal and let’s do this shit
Momma’s gonna freeze you til she… gets…. rich

Voice sounds like what popular band or singer. Can't put my finger on it.
-edit-
Was thinking Kate Bush

I prefer the earlier PMJ version of this, because Kate Davis has a beautiful Patsy-Cline-ish-country-soul voice that works well with this particular arrangement (and she plays the bass) but this is still excellent. And I will be at their London gig this Sunday!

Tags for this video have been changed from 'kate davis, bass, upright, double bass' to 'kate davis, bass, upright, double bass, scott bradlee, postmodern jukebox' - edited by xxovercastxx

Kate Bush back touring!
http://www.theguardian.com/music/2014/mar/21/kate-bush-announces-live-shows-party-1979

*promote

and Awarding Kate BUsh The Sexy Low-Slung Hips & Uniquely Quintessential Voice Award, regardless of nay-sayers and perfectionist-peevers.

...and so totally HAWT!
JEZUSS I'm old! Kates' fifty-FIVE!

Here's her appearance live on Top of the Pops in 1978 as I think it's a much better video than the official video!

related=http://videosift.com/video/Kate-Bush-Wuthering-Heights-2

Tags for this video have been changed from 'singing, wuthering heights' to 'singing, wuthering heights, Kate Bush, cover' - edited by lurgee

Is that Kate Micucci?