I tried watching this but the word "selfie" irritates me beyond belief. It summarizes everything I despise about modern society in one little baby-talk word.

I wonder if this contraption could be hacked to twist off the head of whoever feels the need to use it? So far my attempts to hack iPhones to shoot pepper spray when used like this have failed. :-)

*david letterman baby talking

What do I have to do to get you to stop putting words in my mouth, Genji honey?

It is sooooooooo tiring defending myself from things I never said and don't believe.

From now on, whenever you do it, I am going to respond with "kumquat."

Just "kumquat."

I used to do this with a boyfriend who loved baby talk. I hate baby talk. He was feeling loving and he would bugey goo goo at me and I would want to hit him. When he was feeling loving. So we worked out a deal -- I would look at him with all the love in my heart, eye to eye, and say "kumquat" as sweetly as anything.

It meant stop it now or you aren't getting any nooky because I am grossed out.

So....

Kumquat, genji. No nooky for you if you keep putting words in my mouth that aren't mine.


>> ^GenjiKilpatrick:

@bareboards2
So is this where you draw the line?
She did resist so she deserved it, right?
Or she wasn't resisting in a place designated as a "no disturbing/dancing area" so it's not deserved?
Just trying to understand why you can empathize with this sort of violence but not violence directed against "those silly" protestors.

sorry I downvoted your shitty baby talking video. Not that you care, I know you posted this knowing, damn-well, that it was sift-gold.

The sound of babies make my vas deferens pull my testicles up into my chest.

>> ^rottenseed:

I hate that kids can't say their r's. I couldn't either...it's weally stwange.


Ditto. And it's bofe of dem. The big kid really loved to bone his wood, though.

Baby talk, baby talk. It's a wonder you can walk.

>> ^IronDwarf:

That baby talk drives me nuts. Yes, it does, it dwives me nuts!


[baby talk] What are you doing? Why are you complaining? [/baby talk]

That baby talk drives me nuts. Yes, it does, it dwives me nuts!

>> ^Seric:

'Baby skunk hits the cutness out of the park'
cuteness


Human "baby-talk" degrades cuteness by 80%

In reply to this comment by kymbos:
I was sent to a private school, and as such we had no shortage of competent teachers, but I don't have a single example of a teacher who inspired me. It wasn't until uni that I met inspirational lecturers.

As for the 'what is history' question, I don't believe history is a set of dates and events. IMO, history is the critical interpretation and understanding of these events, and history teachers are probably best place to instill critical faculty in students.


are you flirting with me?
that got me all sweaty.
oh baby..
talk history to me.....
you rock man and you are spot on.
really great how it takes me a novella to write what you did in one sentence.

I hate baby talk so much.

Upvote for the puppies. If I could also downvote for the ladies boring me to death with baby talk, I would.

There's no way baby talking to your child leads to them speaking correctly. If there's a study on it, then that 'study' has to be some loosely monitored, rich mother's Sunday project at best. That's the most absurd 'mother knows best' garbage I've ever heard. I'm with gunrock on this one.

"Motherese"???? Are you fucking kidding me? Who makes this shit up?

I don't give a damn what studies say. I will not be doing baby talk solely based on the fact that it's annoying and I want to punch people when I hear it.

The only problem I have with withholding information from children is that it really does stunt their growth. While, to most people it may not seem stunted, but that's only because they're so used to the status quo and overall ignorance.

For instance, the absolute best example is baby talk. People seem to think it's cute that the babies make these funny noises so they make them back. Well, kids learn through imitation so guess what! The kid thinks that's what it's supposed to do. A kid can actually learn to speak at a surprisingly young age if given the chance. The way to do that is always talk to them as an adult. If you don't use the words, they'll never learn the words.

The same goes for gender identification. When looking at a baby, you can't tell what sex it is unless you can see the genitals. But, tell someone it's a girl and they say how cute and pretty she is or that's she'll be a heart-breaker. Tell them it's a boy, and you get he's handsome and he's going to grow up to be a strong man. It's all BS of course, cause if you told them the wrong gender, they'll start saying that anyways. But the sad part is, just like with language and anything else thought, the sooner you start them, the stronger the impression. False gender identifications such as such are the main source of indoctrination that plagues our society as it is.

So yes, I am all for telling kids everything from the start. The more information, the higher the level of information, the better. Start a kid playing music when they can first press the keys of a piano will ingrain that way of thought more profoundly than first exposing them to music when they're 20.

This is Penn's essay:

I've stopped swearing. I'm 42 years old and from the time I was 16, I talked like carnies and rockers and truckers and sailors. I tried to talk like all the cool people, using obscenity for every part of speech. It seemed like a ticket into a special group of outsiders. I never used hard obscenity on stage, but I was always trying to slip expletives onto the radio (you do know that the FCC is unconstitutional on every front, right?). But in daily existence, I talked trash.

Several months ago, I went to see Slash's Snakepit at a venue in Vegas. He played his guit-box like a ringin' a bell. I was enjoying the show. After the third selection, when it was time for Slash to welcome us, he said, "Welcome. We're really glad to be back in the USA. We were in South America and those people didn't understand us. It feels good to be home.

But, he didn't use those words. I don't have a tape, and I wasn't taking notes, but the words he said were along the lines of, "Oh # man. How you #ers doing? It is so #ing great to #ing be #ing back in this #ing coun-#ing-try. #, man, #. I mean, #. #, man, #. I mean #. Down there, well, #, they #ing don't #ing speak #ing English, man. #. #, it's so #ing great to #ing be here.

In the previous quote, "#" stands for the favorite root word of all wise-cracking, sophisticated, modern folk (it also drove my spell checker nuts). That magic word can be used for every part of speech (yes, its function can even be Conjunction Junction).

I sat in the balcony wondering if I sounded like that. I started becoming more aware of swearing. I had an epiphany -- I realized no one thought I was talking like a carney. They thought I was talking like a mall kid. Nowadays, who knows how carnies talk? It's like tattoos. They used to mean you were on the bally, in the joint, or on the sea. Now, tattoos and swearing just mean you've been to Tower Records. Even mall T-shirts proclaim the magic word.

I still use all those words, even the "C" one that still has some small amount of integrity and magic. However, I only use them for their literal meaning. If I'm talking about real sex, I don't talk baby talk. You won't catch me "making love," "doing it," or even "screwing." But I don't use obscenity as empty modifiers or even as a sexy synecdoche.

My decision to stop swearing is not a moral position. It's not to be polite. It's not to fit in. Quite the opposite. It makes me say what I mean and that's often not polite. Not swearing takes my rants off auto-pilot. Not swearing makes me think. It gives those words their original magic in their literal meanings. It makes them sexier when I'm talking about sex.

I started stopping swearing with some friends. It's difficult, but it's pretty fun. We say more of what we mean. We've started making it clear whether we're displeased with someone for their morals, their style, their hygiene, or their looks (all valid reasons). We no longer label them all with one compound body part metonym. We've become more precise. There's more information.

When someone is talking nonsense, it's bolder, more aggressive, and less acceptable to say, "No, that's not true," than to shout a friendly, ho-hum, reference to bovine fecal matter. Not swearing is not the right thing to do. It's not the classy thing to do. It makes the truth plainer and that's rarely soci ety's view of polite.

There is a downside. Last night I banged the little toe of my right foot hard on the door jam in the middle of the night. I had nothing to say.