No, but thank you for the offer. And congratulations on getting your crown!

In reply to this comment by dystopianfuturetoday:
Nicely carved pussy there. Do you have a video you'd like me to promote?

In reply to this comment by Kuga:
This was supposed to be a cat, though I botched the mouth and you can barely see the whiskers.

(insert joke about Kuga carving up a pussy)

Nicely carved pussy there. Do you have a video you'd like me to promote?

In reply to this comment by Kuga:
This was supposed to be a cat, though I botched the mouth and you can barely see the whiskers.

(insert joke about Kuga carving up a pussy)

This was supposed to be a cat, though I botched the mouth and you can barely see the whiskers.

(insert joke about Kuga carving up a pussy)

Norsu: Never seen an elephant with whiskers before. Before you know it all the other elephants are copying you.

T-Man: your avatar has always creeped me out. Don't know why, but I'm pretty sure it's because that alien is pretty fucking creepy (in a paper mache kind of way).

Nomino: *just stares*

Congrats

^Chat Noir.

It was late at night in a seedy sift talk post when she walked in. Like a tall bowl of milk on a hot summers day, but a bowl of milk that only made you thirstier as you consumed it. 'Isobel', she said with a sly twitch of whiskers when I asked her name, "spelled with an O instead of an A." 'Oh' I said..... lamely.

I knew I should get out of their immediately. At 5 years old, she was nearly 10 times my senior and you don't even want to know how many 'cat years' that added up to. She was smart and worldly. She'd eat me alive, like so many table scraps on a Monday morning.

"Frankie Spade", I said "Private Dick." A very private dick to be exact. Had I been named Frankie Spayed, it would have been closer to the truth. Fortunately for me, she'd had the operation too.....

As it turned out, the iPod headphones that she so loved to play with had all gone missing at the same time, and she suspicioned that the job was done by one of her two shady humans. But why? Why would a human do something so terrible? That must certainly understand our attachment to those precious thin wires and how good they feel on our teeth when we bit them. So after a moments pause, I decided to follow her home, and no sooner had we entered her beach apartment, then she had pushed me to the floor. We wrestled and chased each other for hours. She was a kinky one; she liked to use her teeth and claws....

Sure you ar.... wait... this is from Rottenseed? Pft. You're not worth your weight in salt water.



In reply to this comment by rottenseed:
I was once a random kitten...am I not worth my weight in whiskers?

In reply to this comment by MarineGunrock:
Yeah, that's just where you put it down. No random kitten is worth $3,000.

I was once a random kitten...am I not worth my weight in whiskers?

In reply to this comment by MarineGunrock:
Yeah, that's just where you put it down. No random kitten is worth $3,000.

It makes me wonder if aliens that are listening in to Earth's broadcasts get complete confused about the English language when they accidentally tune into horse racing... They think they have it down, then:

In first its scratch my nose, followed by willie's whiskers, in third place the shot heard round the world being chased by snotty's sixth sense on the outside.

You are the cat's whiskers, Schmawy! I do enjoy your avatar changes.

if you ever watch meerkat manor there's a couple of times the "whiskers" face off against deadly snakes. Meerkats seem to handle the venom much better than people, but it can still be deadly or at the very least extremely debilitating.

National Geographic needs to drop this commentator(not the first one of their documentaries he's ruined), its an educational documentary, not America's Funniest Home Videos.

I had the gain on max and couldn't hear a thing. I know a cat quite well and she says that this cat is annoyed at its *owner rather than sympathizing with them.



*Whiskers dislikes this word.

In the world of fiction and fantasy there are many lands that one can visit and become content in. Never Never Land, Narnia, Azeroth, and Middle-earth. Just to name a few. However none of the afore mentioned lands have as much believability as Lithuania. Why do some believe this made-up fairy tale land exists? Maybe you've seen maps, or WikiPedia says it's a 'real' country. Or maybe MINK himself has said there is such a place.

LIES! all of it. MINK actually lives in what is commonly referred to as a 'flat', for English chaps, and a 'crappy studio apartment' in the United States. There he waits for the BBC to show his favorite episode of terrahawks and crying when Doctor "Tiger" Ninestein dies for the 25th time.

There he sits with garbage littering the floor. A cigarette in one hand and a asthma inhaler in the other. His hair is matted and hasn't been washed in months, his whiskers ensure that even the lowliest of prostitutes that he frequents insist on him wearing a plastic bag mask. The only release he has from life is when he can go to Videosift and pretend he lives in the magical land of Lithuania. Where he pretends to make music that families love.

The poor sad fool. Should we pity him?... most definitely. Should we feel sorry for him?... Not really. Should we confront him about his fantasy land?... I could only serve to crush his spirit, which would be easy if he hadn't sold his soul to Hanna Montana for tickets to her concert.

there was an old farmer who sat on a rock
stroking his whiskers and shaking his

fists at his neighbors who sat on their ricks
teaching their children to play with their

kite strings and marbles and the old days of yore
along came a lady who looked like a

decent young lady and walked like a duck
said she discovered a new way to

bring up the children to sow and to knit
the boys in the stables where shoveling up

contents of stables left after the hunt
the car man was feeling a nice piece of

straw from the stables, cleaning the walls
in came dairymaid to play with his

dog and the dairy where she had belonged
and if you think this is dirty you're f**king well wrong

Snarf. Snarf. You don't like the couch kitty? Snarf. Maybe Lion-o will punch you in the whiskers, snarf.

great names, and funny zooms/pans. Whiskers Malloy was a cutey.