I kind of envy people who can floss with a shoelace and pick their teeth with a #2 pencil.

I prefer the "Ian Knot" which is balanced for even pull on both sides. The balance also reduces wear.

It's been over a year since I started using it, and it only came loose once (with those thick, plasticky laces on one of my shoes). I haven't had any come loose while running, which was a huge change for me.

>> ^spoco2:
As much as I always have opened them the way he used to... I never had any, you know... difficulty with it.
Bite it? Stick your finger into it? What? What's so hard about just pulling back on it like a handle?

Reminds me of the people shown in black and white at the beginning of infomercials who can't seem to accomplish even the simplest of tasks without injuring themselves.

I'll definitely give this a try, but I can't say I ever found myself cursing a banana for not peeling easily. And who knows, maybe I'll switch. I didn't learn about the Ian knot for shoelaces until I was 20, and that wasn't too difficult to implement.

>> ^rottenseed:
>> ^KamikazeCricket:
>> ^rottenseed:
>> ^imstellar28:
Whats the difference between a dead cop and a trampoline?
You take off your boots before jumping on a trampoline.

Somebody been playing madlibs?
What's the difference between a dead _profession and a _noun?
You take your _noun off before _verbing on a _noun

What's the difference between a geologist and a car?
you take your hair off before swimming on a shoelace.
Your mockery fails

I think it was brilliant, poetic, and probably pretty fun, no?
I've got another one:
Why don't you go f_{the letter u}ck yourself


Those who call themselves brilliant are typically perceived as the opposite by everyone else. The fact that you got all butt-hurt over my comment shows just how pretentious you really are. Oh, and no, it was not funny, nor poetic, and certainly not brilliant. Go die in a fire.

>> ^KamikazeCricket:
>> ^rottenseed:
>> ^imstellar28:
Whats the difference between a dead cop and a trampoline?
You take off your boots before jumping on a trampoline.

Somebody been playing madlibs?
What's the difference between a dead _profession and a _noun?
You take your _noun off before _verbing on a _noun

What's the difference between a geologist and a car?
you take your hair off before swimming on a shoelace.
Your mockery fails

I think it was brilliant, poetic, and probably pretty fun, no?

I've got another one:

Why don't you go f_{the letter u}ck yourself

>> ^rottenseed:
>> ^imstellar28:
Whats the difference between a dead cop and a trampoline?
You take off your boots before jumping on a trampoline.

Somebody been playing madlibs?
What's the difference between a dead _profession and a _noun?
You take your _noun off before _verbing on a _noun


What's the difference between a geologist and a car?
you take your hair off before swimming on a shoelace.

Your mockery fails

Most of the people advocating water boarding are empty headed sheep who couldn't think and tie their shoelaces at the same time.

It's immoral! In my worldview (non-religious), that means that it does more damage than good to the person or group PERFORMING the act in the long term. What goes around comes around, and I mean that in a very literal, non-karmic kind of way. The US had established itself as a high-value society, and that is gone now. That means nobody in the world is going to get upset when our citizens get captured and tortured now. We had everybody behind us after 9/11, and now we have nobody behind us.

And why did we throw away our integrity? To prop up the lies that allowed us to invade a country with vast oil reserves. That's it. No ticking bomb. No network of terrorists. Just lies upon lies, for money and transitory power.

It is so clear to me that the Bush administration could signal the imminent fall of the US as a top player on the world stage, and these so-called patriots open their mouths to spew talking points in an effort to defend it. Defending actions which could very well destroy this country from the inside out. Yeah, real patriots.

>> ^Arg:
I'd be amazed if this man is capable of tying his own shoelaces.


I meet him and he is an intelligent, funny and likable guy. Of course you can mock and spout something about a person that you don't know instead of dealing with what he says.
Ben Stein was considered one of the smart guys before he decided to make his movie about Evolution. Now (even though he is not a Christian) he is mocked in similar fashion.
I was under the impression that this is a country where people can speak their mind and challenge thought?! Isn't that, an open discusion and reasoning, what makes sience worthwhile and lead to something?
Funny how nobody wants to talk about the things that Darwin said would have to fall into place to prove his theory. Funny how many of the “proof” comes out forged or plain false? If it is so clear and logigal… why the need to forge things? Funny how these known forgeries are still used in school text books today?!

Just to name a few:

Piltdown man: Found in a gravel pit in Sussex England in 1912, this fossil was considered by some sources to be the second most important fossil proving the evolution of man—until it was found to be a complete forgery 41 years later. The skull was found to be of modern age. The fragments had been chemically stained to give the appearance of age, and the teeth had been filed down!


Nebraska Man from the Illustrated London NewsNebraska man: A single tooth, discovered in Nebraska in 1922 grew an entire evolutionary link between man and monkey, until another identical tooth was found which was protruding from the jawbone of a wild pig.


Java man: Initially discovered by Dutchman Eugene Dubois in 1891, all that was found of this claimed originator of humans was a skullcap, three teeth and a femur. The femur was found 50 feet away from the original skullcap a full year later. For almost 30 years Dubois downplayed the Wadjak skulls (two undoubtedly human skulls found very close to his "missing link"). (source: Hank Hanegraaff, The Face That Demonstrates The Farce Of Evolution, [Word Publishing, Nashville, 1998], pp.50-52)


Orce man: Found in the southern Spanish town of Orce in 1982, and hailed as the oldest fossilized human remains ever found in Europe. One year later officials admitted the skull fragment was not human but probably came from a 4 month old donkey. Scientists had said the skull belonged to a 17 year old man who lived 900,000 to 1.6 million years ago, and even had very detail drawings done to represent what he would have looked like. (source: "Skull fragment may not be human", Knoxville News-Sentinel, 1983)


Neanderthal: Still synonymous with brutishness, the first Neanderthal remains were found in France in 1908. Considered to be ignorant, ape-like, stooped and knuckle-dragging, much of the evidence now suggests that Neanderthal was just as human as us, and his stooped appearance was because of arthritis and rickets. Neanderthals are now recognized as skilled hunters, believers in an after-life, and even skilled surgeons, as seen in one skeleton whose withered right arm had been amputated above the elbow. (source: "Upgrading Neanderthal Man", Time Magazine, May 17, 1971, Vol. 97, No. 20)

The theory of embryonic recapitulation asserts that the human fetus goes through various stages of its evolutionary history as it develops. Ernst Haeckel proposed this theory in the late 1860’s, promoting Darwin’s theory of evolution in Germany. He made detailed drawings of the embryonic development of eight different embryos in three stages of development, to bolster his claim. His work was hailed as a great development in the understanding of human evolution. A few years later his drawings were shown to have been fabricated, and the data manufactured. He blamed the artist for the discrepancies, without admitting that he was the artist. (source: Russell Grigg, "Fraud Rediscovered", Creation, Vol. 20, No. 2, pp.49-51)

I'd be amazed if this man is capable of tying his own shoelaces.

thats too funny.

'just a quick stop on the wrong side of the road,... to, uh,... check the shoelaces... yep, both looking good,... maybe I'll check whats in the trunk whilst I'm back here,... room for, more things back there, in the trunk... oh I don't know, maybe I'll just borrow this... (yoink)... and on my way!'

This is just a votapalooza of funny quips and comments. If his shoelace weren't tied right when the swing peaked there was a long damn way down.

Poor thing, she has to answer questions politicians have to answer.

What next? They'll expect her to tie her shoelaces by herself?

Maybe she should only do interviews with Sean Hannity from now on.

Awesome! He was such a rebel back then with his two different color shoelaces!
*sport

Check out the last two seconds. "Oh, it was not fancy footwork at all, my shoelace was untied, and I was desperately trying not to trip."

>> ^jwray:
> I am most definitely not going to ever to commit suicide because there is no afterlife.

funny. that's one of the reasons i was going to.
even funnier, to me, that a belief that there is an afterlife, is the reason some people do.

and no, it wasn't like yesterday or anything, so don't go all mushy on me.
it's not all that dramatic an admission, so let (s)he who has never wanted to, cast the first gasp.

it's why most of you already know hanging yourself is a bad choice.
too easy to fuck up, and die of asphyxiation. instead of falling from a significant height, so that your neck snaps.

only 2 kind of people will generally resort to it.
a) the shoelace hanging. in prison, or elsewhere without normal availability to a gun, pills, etc.
b) the self-condemned. the association with capital punishment allows those with an extremely guilty conscience, who think they deserve it, go to the gallows as they had probably planned.

that's my list, anyway. then there's the non-suicide michael hutchence scenario, where you didn't actually plan on dying, just getting your rocks off toying with your death.

in her case, a) definitely doesn't apply. one might argue b) could, but it's paper-thin. she was a pimp, not a killer. the laws she broke weren't hurting anyone, and i doubt she felt an ounce of guilt for selling sex.

but people like alex jones lose their credibility, by going from possibility, to certainty. instead of just admitting they've got questions, they go ahead and fill in the blanks themselves.

is it fishy? sure.
will anything come of it? almost certainly not, in which case we've all got bigger fish to fry.