Needed: I ain't no freakin' monument to justice! I lost my hand! I lost my bride! Johnny has his hand! Johnny has his bride!

EDIT: As it is missing it, here it is (the freak out starts about 2:55):

I was at the TIFF premier after party/concert with the Burning Brides entertaining, Alex Lifeson from Rush joined them onstage and kicked all sorts of ass. The bass player from BB was GREAT!

The true laughs came with: "Wouldn't this be a good reason to call off the wedding? I mean, he has had quite the day. Wonder how the bride has been doing... Next thing the groom shows up in bomb ashes and bird shit. 'Sorry honey, I had quite the day. All the living creatures in all the town tried to kill me.'"

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I can honestly say I haven't gone to an interesting wedding in at least a dozen years, if not more. Most of them are typical, hum drum events that are only fun for the bride & groom. But this.. this I think if I attended I would have called the greatest wedding EVA!

Kinda cringe-inducing to be honest, but still funny...

I think the worst part is that really, the groom is the only one who seems to be dressed up in a "theme." Even the bride's dress is not really that themey...

I love how the bride acts surprised, watches for a second... and then just moves on.

List from here:

0’00 - Roxanne, Adventures of Priscilla Queen of the Desert, Gleaming the Cube, The Princess Bride, A Fish Called Wanda, Star Wars, The Wizard of Oz, Casino, Three Amigos, A Clockwork Orange

1’05 - Dolemite, Glengarry Glen Ross, Bad Santa, The Witches of Eastwick, The Big Lebowski, In Bruges, Full Metal Jacket, There Will Be Blood

2’05 - Toy Story, Casablanca, Encino Man, The Women, Predator, Army of Darkness, They Live, Uncle Buck, Big Trouble in Little China, New Jack City, Billy Madison

3’00 - Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, The Departed, Carlito’s Way, In the Loop, Glengarry Glen Ross, Stand By Me, Grosse Pointe Blank, Duck Soup, Caddyshack, Planes Trains & Automobiles

4’00 - South Park, Napoleon Dynamite, Mean Girls, The Breakfast Club, As Good as It Gets, The 6th Day, Step Brothers, O Brother Where Art Thou?, Full Metal Jacket, City Slickers, Road House, True Grit, Shot Circuit

5’00 - Raging Bull, The Usual Suspects, Snatch, Caddyshack, The Last Boy Scout, Ghostbusters, The Sandlot, As Good as It Gets

6’00 - 48 Hrs, In Bruges, Silver Streak, Glengarry Glen Ross, A Fish Called Wanda, Goodfellas, National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation, The Mist, Trading Places

7’00 - The Warriors, Point Break, Gangs of New York, Reservoir Dogs, The Breakfast Club, The Cowboys, Full Metal Jacket, Dodgeball, Donnie Darko, Scarface, The Good the Bad and the Ugly

8’00 - Anchorman, Tropic Thunder, Sexy Beast, In the Loop, Get Shorty, Blazing Saddles, The Way of the Gun, Blade: Trinity, Clerks, The Boondock Saints, The Exorcist, What About Bob?, Weird Science

9’00 - Con Air, True Romance, In the Loop, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Lake Placid, The Front, Gone with the Wind

Tags for this video have been changed from 'Mountain, Climber, Groom, Bride, Priest' to 'Mountain, Climber, Groom, Bride, Priest, seth macfarlane' - edited by rasch187

So Patinkin dated my mom briefly in college. Years later, his son came with Patinkin for a pre-high school graduation college visit. Guess who gave the two of them a tour of the dormitory? Yours truly.

Guess who else graduated from my college (Oberlin) and talked to my creative writing class?

William Goldman -- the author of the Princess Bride.

This is great, but it doesn't even scratch the surface of how crazy being a Spartan wife was.

First was the marriage, wherein the bride would have her head shaved, be dressed in men's clothes then made to lay alone in the dark on a pallet waiting for her husband (who she may have never met) to abduct her, have his way with her, then return her to her parent's house.

This was the start of a marriage which, for the first few years, consisted of the husband showing up at night once in a while for sex and otherwise having no real contact. After the husband reached the age of 30 he was allowed to live outside of the men's barracks so he would finally be able to live with his wife. Things didn't get much more "normal" from there though...

As the Spartan marriage was primarily for procreation, it was not unheard of for an older man to give permission for younger men to have sex with his wife in order for him to have strong, healthy children (the marriage's duty was to bear strong children for the state after all). There is no evidence that Spartan women were opposed to this though. They had greater rights than many other women throughout history with respect to property ownership (it is estimated that women owned 35% of all Spartan holdings), they probably received benefits from these arrangements. According to ancient historians like Plutarch these Spartan customs ensured that adultery, illegitimacy and prostitution were nonexistent in Sparta.

Further, unlike Athenian women who wore heavy, concealing clothes and were rarely seen outside the house, Spartan women wore short dresses and went where they pleased.

So being a Spartan wife was quite the interesting life. It could be difficult, but the benefits were a greater freedom, autonomy, wealth and power than any other women in the ancient world.

>> ^joedirt:

What ignorance...
You can look from a modern perspective about what is morally appropriate age of consent but you are a fucking absolute idiot if you pretend that 18 years is ok, and say 13 isn't. It all depends on historical context. You have to look at the society at the time.
Go back to Jesus's time. How old was Mary? What was age of marriage in Moses day? How about what would be ok in the US in 1910? What about in the 50s? Hate to tell you this, but for probably hundreds of millions of years, when a female reaches puberty that is when they begin to copulate.
You are fucking idiot if you think it's wrong to breed dogs that under the age of 5 but somehow humans are so different. It's all cultural morals and depends on the society. Do you know what was "normal" in the 700s before you start throwing around kiddie fucker.
You do realize your own great great grandfather was probably also a kiddie fucker, ever think about that?

Everyone should know that BicycleRepairMan is descended from a long line of "kiddie fiddlers"!!!

Ignorance? Historical context? You're kidding right? Shariah permits child brides. Shariah is followed today. Prepubescent children are being married off right now.
If you really think this is ok because it was culturally acceptable historically speaking, then you sir, are full of shit.

>> ^raverman:

That's really rude!
Everyone knows that, at a wedding, it's good manners to slap the bride's titties first!


It's a short video - for all you know he did just that during a previous song. Certainly the woman on stage doesn't seem at all surprised or put off.

That's really rude!
Everyone knows that, at a wedding, it's good manners to slap the bride's titties first!