A 70-year-old Texas Rancher got his hand caught in a gate while working cattle. He wrapped the hand in his bandana and drove his pickup to the doctor. While suturing the laceration, the doctor asked the old man about George W. Bush being in the White House.

The old Texan said, "Well, ya know, Bush is a 'Post Turtle.'"

Not knowing what the old man meant, the doctor asked what a Post Turtle was.

The old man looked at him and drawled, "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a Post Turtle."

The old man saw a puzzled look on the doctor's face, so he continued to explain:

"You know he didn't get there by himself, he doesn't belong there, he can't get anything done while he's up there, and you just want to help the poor dumb bastard get down."

(CNN) -- A Johns Hopkins University student killed an apparent burglar with a samurai sword after discovering the man in his garage, police said Tuesday.

Baltimore, Maryland, police received a phone call shortly before 1:30 a.m. Tuesday about a suspicious person, and an off-duty officer arrived at the scene with campus security, city police spokesman Anthony Guglielmi said.

When authorities arrived, they heard calls for help and for police, he said. They discovered a suspected burglar with a severed left hand and severe lacerations to his upper body, Guglielmi said.

The suspect died at the scene, he said.

The man had entered a home where several Johns Hopkins students lived, Guglielmi said. Four students, one armed with a samurai sword, had confronted the suspect in the garage.

The man "lunged" at the students, and the student with the sword defended himself, severing the man's left hand and cutting his upper body, Guglielmi said.

Police did not release the name of the suspect, who Guglielmi said had a long criminal history, or that of the student.

Police questioned the three witnesses, Guglielmi said, and released them. It was not immediately clear whether all four students lived at the house, he said.

Authorities are determining whether the student will face criminal charges, Guglielmi said.

Burglars had taken two laptops and a Sony PlayStation from the students' home Monday, Guglielmi said.

The burglary suspect had been released from prison Saturday, Guglielmi said.
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I call BS on all the posts gently tip-toeing around the sheer brutality portrayed in this video. The allure of unquestioned authority is undoubtedly attractive to bullies, and that's what we just witnessed. I'm floored with how disease protection is even an issue. Having to serve and protect an individual that has suffered burns and lacerations is an obvious part of the job. The fact of the matter is that the police officers portrayed in this video and the other tazer happy cops recently in the news, are just not equipped to be Peace Officers. You don't need personal experience of a loved one savagely battered by police officers to understand the constant themes, but apparently it might help some of you.

>> ^quantumushroom:
This clown just made the news!
Next time, don't punch the hooker in the face, JERK.


Mugshot here

"Shlomi told cops he paid [Sasha] Harris about $1000 in cash after she “propositioned him for straight sex.” Shlomi said that when he kissed Harris, she suddenly “bit his tongue and would not let go.” Shlomi then punched Harris several times until she released his tongue. The affidavit…notes that during the 4 AM fight Harris sustained facial fractures and lacerations all over her face…. After freeing his tongue, a bleeding Shlomi ran to the [hotel] lobby, where security summoned cops. Harris refused to cooperate with officers, who recovered $930 from her purse.

The hooker is reportedly considering a lawsuit against Shlomi, though prosecutors “declined to file formal charges” against him."

>> ^MarineGunrock:
And anyone that's seen any laceration on the head knows that bleeding is profuse.



Mmmm, not necessarily. I've only worked in the emergency room a couple months now but I've seen plenty of kids come in with head lacerations like that from falling or running into stuff that don't bleed that bad.

I don't know. The reaction was really delayed and under-emphatic. Add the fact that someone that took a ricochet to the head probably wouldn't be too concerned with getting their hat off the ground. And anyone that's seen any laceration on the head knows that bleeding is profuse. Add all that together and I get a suspicion that it's a fake.

I will say this in it's favor though: the hat seemed to fly with the wind at the same speed as the dust cloud.

This speech seems to me to be a truncated version of the one Edward R. Murrow gave to the RTNDA Convention in Chicago on October 15, 1958. This isn't really a new perspective, which isn't to say it isn't one we should be hearing. I just feel that Dan Rather was content to tow the party line for so long, without any dissent, he was on the inside of the corporate news media and was fine to live there until he was forced to take the fall for the Bush National Guard story. I think he has done a lot of great work throughout his career, but to proffer this idea as a new one makes me think he is either naive, or was perhaps complacent to be blind for a time, while he benefited off of the machine he now lacerates.

Edward R. Murrow speech is here: http://www.turnoffyourtv.com/commentary/hiddenagenda/murrow.html

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars

Look at me, look at me
hands in the air like it's good to be
ALIVE
and I'm a famous rapper
even when the paths're all crookedy
I can show you how to do-si-do
I can show you how to scratch a record
I can take apart the remote control
And I can almost put it back together
I can tie a knot in a cherry stem
I can tell you about Leif Ericson
I know all the words to "De Colores"
And "I'm Proud to be an American"
Me and my friend saw a platypus
Me and my friend made a comic book
And guess how long it took
I can do anything that I want cuz, look:

I can keep rhythm with no metronome
No metronome
No metronome

I can see your face on the telephone
On the telephone
On the telephone

Look at me
Look at me
Just called to say that it's good to be
ALIVE
In such a small world
All curled up with a book to read
I can make money open up a thrift store
I can make a living off a magazine
I can design an engine sixty four
Miles to a gallon of gasoline
I can make new antibiotics
I can make computers survive aquatic conditions
I know how to run a business
And I can make you wanna buy a product
Movers shakers and producers
Me and my friends understand the future
I see the strings that control the systems
I can do anything with no assistance
I can lead a nation with a microphone
With a microphone
With a microphone
I can split the atoms of a molecule
Of a molecule
Of a molecule

Look at me
Look at me
Driving and I won't stop
And it feels so good to be
Alive and on top
My reach is global
My tower secure
My cause is noble
My power is pure
I can hand out a million vaccinations
Or let'em all die in exasperation
Have'em all grilled leavin lacerations
Have'em all killed by assassination
I can make anybody go to prison
Just because I don't like'em and
I can do anything with no permission
I have it all under my command
I can guide a missile by satellite
By satellite
By satellite
and I can hit a target through a telescope
Through a telescope
Through a telescope
and I can end the planet in a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handle bars
No handlebars

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars

Look at me, look at me
hands in the air like it's good to be
ALIVE
and I'm a famous rapper
even when the paths're all crookedy
I can show you how to do-si-do
I can show you how to scratch a record
I can take apart the remote control
And I can almost put it back together
I can tie a knot in a cherry stem
I can tell you about Leif Ericson
I know all the words to "De Colores"
And "I'm Proud to be an American"
Me and my friend saw a platypus
Me and my friend made a comic book
And guess how long it took
I can do anything that I want cuz, look:

I can keep rhythm with no metronome
No metronome
No metronome

I can see your face on the telephone
On the telephone
On the telephone

Look at me
Look at me
Just called to say that it's good to be
ALIVE
In such a small world
All curled up with a book to read
I can make money open up a thrift store
I can make a living off a magazine
I can design an engine sixty four
Miles to a gallon of gasoline
I can make new antibiotics
I can make computers survive aquatic conditions
I know how to run a business
And I can make you wanna buy a product
Movers shakers and producers
Me and my friends understand the future
I see the strings that control the systems
I can do anything with no assistance
I can lead a nation with a microphone
With a microphone
With a microphone
I can split the atoms of a molecule
Of a molecule
Of a molecule

Look at me
Look at me
Driving and I won't stop
And it feels so good to be
Alive and on top
My reach is global
My tower secure
My cause is noble
My power is pure
I can hand out a million vaccinations
Or let'em all die in exasperation
Have'em all grilled leavin lacerations
Have'em all killed by assassination
I can make anybody go to prison
Just because I don't like'em and
I can do anything with no permission
I have it all under my command
I can guide a missile by satellite
By satellite
By satellite
and I can hit a target through a telescope
Through a telescope
Through a telescope
and I can end the planet in a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust
In a holocaust

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handle bars
No handlebars

I can ride my bike with no handlebars
No handlebars
No handlebars

Wait a second. I just read that you thought a little humping mouse was NOT entertaining, but a human being suffering lacerations and contusions apparently is?! Even if it's fake (and it probably is), it's not funny.

I have always maintained, that knowledge is power with regards to one's health.
IF, you do not put shit in, you get an organism putting out till it stops, on most cases-The health care situation in the U.S., believe it or say nay, could be transformed, if people would begin to prevent the necessity of such a machine , and begin to teach it to future gens-Die n'beatus, heart disease, and cancer, would have not the effect and levels of preeminence, if folks would eat right.

Then you got yer oath-Hippocrates fans will remember, that docs are in it for one thing-the protection and facilitating of life, above all else-I am forty-two, have had 2 major surgeries because of my own stupid shit, and both I had done, at a county hospital, and never payed a dime, nor did I suffer the credit probs, nor was i turned away for service....HOWEVER-I did have to work harder than most, to get the services rendered....I had to open my mouth, put my foot down, and work it, but I got it done, and done right. This meant being a bit smarter than yer average uninsured person-

I am not suggesting this for anyone else, you must find what makes you comfy. I keep full coverage for my kids,but not for myself. I need a hospital for one thing, at 42....Emergency technical assistance. Broken bones, deep lacerations, and the like....If I become mortally ill, I live in a country, where I will not be left die on the street, or released from a hospital for non-payment, if to do so would end my life-SO....if it gets to the point where I need a transplant, bone marrow or otherwise...GUESS WHAT?? It is at this point, I will prepare for the afterlife. There are plenty of guinea pigs lined up after I pass.
The pharmaceutical industry needs a goddamn leash onnit, as well as insurance companies, not to mention the number if illegals burdening the system, with roman-catholic inspired multiple births-this is not an illusion, it is happening. Take responsibility for yer own well-being, and you don't really need a doctor. jwray, why would I need a blood-pressure medicine, if my blood pressure was not whacked by poor eating habits? Or why would I need to be on an anti-depressant, or my kid on ADHD meds, if I had educated myself as to the possible causes of my own bullshit? Serious auto accidents in the US are mostly due to alcohol?....NO. Booze and pharmies.Let the idiots kill themselves with food and drugs.

If I become seriously ill, Emphysema or Cancer because I smoke, is it not a tragic thing, not that I did not have insurance or medical attention, but that I continued that which got me in that state?

We have a system that works in the U.S., but like most entities here as well, it is poorly managed and abused, and overdue for refining....we can start by burning every fucking fast food joint to the ground.

Kaziranga, Assam, June 09 : Delayed reports from the field and video replays of the attack by the tigress on the mahout Satya Pegu, tell a different story, where human lives were saved purely due to “quick thinking” by the female working elephant, Joymala.

For those who came in late, a large adult tigress, suspected to be the mother of the two cubs rescued from Tamuli Pathar village(adjoining Kaziranga) on May 16, severely mauled the mahout of an Assam forest department elephant, which was carrying rangers trying to dart her on the morning of May 19.

The 25-year-old mahout, Satya Pegu, who was badly lacerated, lost three fingers on his left hand, is in a hospital in Dibrugarh. Doctors are worried about the onset of gangrene and may have to amputate his left palm. The Wildlife Trust of India and its partner, the International Fund for Animal Welfare have offered to cover his medical expenses.

Reconstruction of events and a video taken by the divisional forest officer, R.K.Das, graphically show how Joymala pinned down the tigress with her foot as it was trying to get up and attack the officers who had fallen on the ground.

The reconstructed story goes a bit like this: the forest department received a message early on May 19th about a large tiger which had killed two cows near Tamuli Pathar village, which is close to the boundary of the Kaziranga National Park (KNP) in the north-eastern Assam state.

By 10 am a joint team of the Assam forest department including the director of the park, Mr N. K. Vasu, the local administration, police and the army, and the Wildlife Trust of India(WTI)-managed Centre for Wildlife Rehabilitation and Conservation (CWRC) was combing the area with five elephants trying to locate the animal.

“From the pugmarks, it looked like a very large female, which led us to suspect that this may be the mother of the two cubs that we had rescued and released on Monday,” Dr Bhaskar Choudhary, CWRC veterinarian, who was involved in darting the two sub-adult tigers on Sunday, said. The tigers were released late on Monday evening in the eastern part of the Agoratuli range near the Matiaranga guard hut.

“After looking around everywhere, we first spotted the tigress in a bamboo grove near the village. As it sensed our presence it moved into the backyard of a hut and then quickly walked into a nearby paddy field,” Dr Chaudhary said.

Range officer, Dharanidhar Bodo, Dr Chaudhary along with a guard were riding the elephant, Joymala, driven by Pegu. Bodo was carrying the darting gun. As the elephant moved towards the tigress, it did a mock charge. The guard fired two blanks to discourage her and she ran away into the next field, where the paddy was thick and hid there.

The team cautiously moved towards it and could get to almost 20 feet where she was growling away. Bodo could see her clearly and took a shot at it with the dart gun. The dart missed her and this enraged her so much that she charged and took a “flying” leap on to the elephant’s head. “I have not seen something as dramatic as this,” Vivek Menon, executive director WTI, who recently saw the footage, said. “I could never imagine that a tiger could so effortlessly leap from the ground on to an adult elephant’s head, which is at least 12 feet above the ground,” he said.

The footage showed that Pegu saw the tigress leaping and threw the metal ankush at it to defend himself. “The tigress saw the ankush coming, dodged it in mid-leap and took a swipe at Pegu without actually landing on the elephant, which had stepped back,” Menon said.

“It all happened in a few seconds and before we knew what both Bodo and the guard had fallen down,” Dr Choudhary narrated. What now happened was even more amazing. As the tigress landed on the ground Joymala quickly pinned her down with her left fore foot and tried to control it with its trunk. The tigress struggled under this weight for at least half a minute roaring, as other people in the vicinity shouted and fired shots in the air. In this commotion another attempt was made to dart it, but even this shot was off the mark. The tigress finally struggled loose and ran away.

“If it had not been for Joymala, both Bodo and the guard would have been badly injured or dead,” he said. Meanwhile, Joymala, which was trying to aggressively chase the tigress, was calmed by the CWRC veterinarian, who was holding on to the profusely bleeding mahout. “His fingers were hanging by few shreds of tissue and I tried to tourniquet the wounds,” he said.

The two sub-adult tigers had strayed out of the heavily wooded Agoratuli range of the KNP into the neighbouring Tamuli Pathar village close to the national highway. It was speculated that the mother could be nearby, but she could not be spotted.

KNP has one of the highest density of tigers among the protected areas in India , but are difficult to see due to the thick vegetation in this grassland dominated park.

The Centre for Wildlife Rehabilitation and Conservation (CWRC) is a joint venture of the Assam forest department and the Wildlife Trust of India, and is supported by its partner the International Fund for Animal Welfare (IFAW). This rescue and rehabilitation facility for animals of the region is a first of its kind facility in India has handled over 300 animals in the last two years including mega-herbivores like elephants, rhinos and wild buffaloes. These were the first tigers brought to the facility in two years of its existence.

Complete Video - http://youtube.com/watch?v=1LjG7S8aqJg

I didn't think it was meant towards me but just wanted to be clear on it. Thanks for the note and in the end it's all good.

In reply to your comment:
“I wasn't taking a stab at you with my comment. I've had some problems with younger members who seem to take downvotes personally. Practically anyone who has a gold star can handle it pretty well. I get your jibs and find them enjoyable. Props about the going with your gut part. I hear you, sometimes I think too much sometimes I regret giving it a thumbs up.

In reply to your comment:
“I think you are over analyzing things there choggie, it's pretty hard to get a real insight into what was intended or not just from a posted video or its title. I think the best way vote is with your gut, at least that is what I do. If I watch something and my gut says downvote, so it goes. Sometimes I will extend and extra moment of thought to it if I am feeling all tingly but 99% of the time I vote with my gut feeling before I over think it.

and gorgonheap it doesn't bother me when you downvote videos because it helps identify what you do and don't like and there is nothing wrong with that. As for the fact some people give you crap over it, in my case please don't mistake a friendly poke with a stab in the eye. Ant however has several lacerations from my previous attempts but I have almost figured out the method to his madness so I put my sharp stick away. ””

I wasn't taking a stab at you with my comment. I've had some problems with younger members who seem to take downvotes personally. Practically anyone who has a gold star can handle it pretty well. I get your jibs and find them enjoyable. Props about the going with your gut part. I hear you, sometimes I think too much sometimes I regret giving it a thumbs up.

In reply to your comment:
“I think you are over analyzing things there choggie, it's pretty hard to get a real insight into what was intended or not just from a posted video or its title. I think the best way vote is with your gut, at least that is what I do. If I watch something and my gut says downvote, so it goes. Sometimes I will extend and extra moment of thought to it if I am feeling all tingly but 99% of the time I vote with my gut feeling before I over think it.

and gorgonheap it doesn't bother me when you downvote videos because it helps identify what you do and don't like and there is nothing wrong with that. As for the fact some people give you crap over it, in my case please don't mistake a friendly poke with a stab in the eye. Ant however has several lacerations from my previous attempts but I have almost figured out the method to his madness so I put my sharp stick away. ”

I think you are over analyzing things there choggie, it's pretty hard to get a real insight into what was intended or not just from a posted video or its title. I think the best way vote is with your gut, at least that is what I do. If I watch something and my gut says downvote, so it goes. Sometimes I will extend and extra moment of thought to it if I am feeling all tingly but 99% of the time I vote with my gut feeling before I over think it.

and gorgonheap it doesn't bother me when you downvote videos because it helps identify what you do and don't like and there is nothing wrong with that. As for the fact some people give you crap over it, in my case please don't mistake a friendly poke with a stab in the eye. Ant however has several lacerations from my previous attempts but I have almost figured out the method to his madness so I put my sharp stick away.