on january 26th of this year, dft managed to somehow control enough people's minds to get them to upvote his comments so that he had all five of the top rated new comments.

it's been a while, and i think we should commemorate the occasion by taking turns 'completing' those comments with what we think he really said...

1. Hopefully one day we will rid ourselves of puritan ... kitten video downvoters and Issy and I will rule this place with an iron paw!

2. Oh, and for what it's worth, I only pleasure myself ...

3. I guess I just don't see the problem with seeing two ... girls lovingly embracing a cup.

4. This one isn't nearly as bad, because we know that ... the U.S. americans are unable to do so, because uh, some people out there in our nation don't have maps, and uh, I believe that our education like such as.

5. Kung Fu porn doesn't really do it for me. Does anyone else ... find leprechauns unbearably attractive?