I had to do it. (Blog Post)

 

I don't know why, but this idea popped into my head earlier tonight, and I felt oddly compelled to see it realized.

Better with a beard (Blog Post)

So I started a new blog, with the general intention of proving that every man looks better with a beard.  Skeptical?  Check out the blog.  Beards are awesome, and this blog is proof.

How to eat popcorn without getting shot (Blog Post)

So I was reading this story about a man who was shot for eating popcorn too loudly during a screening of Black Swan, and it got me thinking: though the punishment is probably too severe for the crime, it is a sad fact that a surprising amount of people do not know how to eat popcorn in a civilized manner.  Seriously, it's not that difficult to eat popped corn without being a boar and infuriating your fellow movie-goers.

 HOW TO EAT POPCORN WITHOUT RAISING THE IRE OF THOSE AROUND YOU (ME ESPECIALLY)

1) Pick up a few kernels of popcorn.

2) Put said kernels in your mouth.

3) Close your mouth.

4) Chew, swallow.

5) Repeat.

The most important step here is number three.  Seriously, close your damn mouth before you eat.  A lot of people put popcorn in their mouth, and then crunch down as they are closing their mouth. This means that the first bite is occurring in an open mouth, which allows the sound to reverberate out and aggravate those around you. If you close your mouth before taking that first bite, the sound is cut down by a very large margin, and can only really be heard by someone right next to you during a quiet scene.

(and a tangential lesson that seems apropos is scene awareness -- if it is a really dramatic scene in the movie, and the scene is mostly silent, maybe wait a bit to start munching on your snacks?  They're not going anywhere.  You can still eat them in a couple of minutes once the scene ends.)

This has been a public service announcement by Sarzy, a frequently infuriated movie-goer.

Dear Americans, (Blog Post)

I'm getting sick of hearing about this so-called "Thanksgiving."  Thanksgiving was last month.

Sincerely,

A Canadian

Last night's True Blood (Blog Post)

Anybody on the sift watching True Blood?  This season has been a bit uneven (though mostly good), but man, the ending of last night's episode was one of the awesomest things I've seen in quite a while.  I was thinking about trying to sift this but I doubt there are enough True Blood viewers on the site.  I don't know how many times I've watched this scene since last night.  Good times.

Hot Dog City (Blog Post)

So I was going through some of the shorts I made back in film school, and I came across this and thought it deserved to be put online in a decent quality version.   It's about street vendor hot dogs in Toronto, made for a documentary class.  It's short and kind of silly, but in many ways I think it's probably my favourite film that I've made.  I don't know if that's an indictment on the quality of my films in general, but there you go.

This is why I'm fat (Blog Post)

Yes, I just ate this.  That's a Quarter Pounder with Cheese, with the bun removed and replaced with two grilled cheese sandwiches (which are on the kid's menu at McDonald's, FYI).  I believe this type of burger is known as a "Fatty Melt", though I can't find any evidence that anyone has tried this at McDonald's before.  Or maybe they just weren't foolish enough to admit to it in public.

Somehow, this was much more awesome in theory than in execution.  I mean, it was okay (albeit absurdly fattening) but the cheese sort of overwhelmed everything else.  Plus: I ate this about an hour ago and I'm still feeling pretty queasy.  I'd probably advise against trying this (though it might work a bit better with an Angus Burger, since the patty there is a bit thicker and more flavourful, so it would probably stand up to the grilled cheese a bit better.  Hmmm....).

Quarter Pounder with Cheese + grilled cheese sandwich buns (ie. Quarter Pounder Fatty Melt) - om nom

Sweet Jesus, I'm seeing Inception tomorrow. UPDATE: My mind = blown (Blog Post)

So I wasn't sure if I'd get to go or not, but I just found out -- I'll be joining my brother at an Inception screening tomorrow night.  HOT DAMN I'm excited.  It's like the night before Christmas!  If this movie is anything less than the MOVIE OF THE DECADE, I'll be very surprised.

Hmm... I'm beginning to think my expectations may be a tad too high.

UPDATE:  They weren't.  HOLY SHIT that was amazing.  Christopher Nolan just keeps getting better, and in terms of his big budget action stuff, you can definitely feel the progression in quality from Batman Begins to the Dark Knight to this.  Everything about it is amazing, from the performances to the action to the frequently jaw-dropping visuals.  The whole thing is just so damn compelling.  I'll definitely be seeing it again this weekend.

 

INCEPTION - 10 more days! (Blog Post)

 

The wait is starting to get a bit unbearable.  Seriously, I am SO HYPED for this movie.  The first reviews are starting to pour in, and not surprisingly, they are overwhelmingly positive.  Lots of Kubrick comparisons.  One review compared it to Rififi, which is the best heist movie ever, and one of my favourite films of all time.  Sweet Jesus.  I need to see this movie NOW. Who cares if this summer has been so crappy for movies so far -- all people are going to need to remember a few years from now is that this is the summer that Inception came out.

Purple crocodile cereal? (Blog Post)

Okay.  So there was a cereal mascot, probably from the early '90s or perhaps the late '80s.  I'm pretty sure he was a crocodile, and he was purple.  The cereal was a Cheerios knock-off that I'm pretty sure is no longer being sold.  And I remember there used to be a lot of ads on TV for this cereal, with the crocodile being funky or something.  And no one I know remembers this!  Google searches come up with nothing.  Come on, someone must remember this guy!

Edit: Well, NetRunner helped me solve it.  The cereal was Cruncheroos, and the mascot was Crunchosaurus Rex.

And... the real deal:

 



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