This is no parody mate, you can get these "I'm a douche" jeans here..
http://www.ae.com/web/search/searchResults.jsp?question=skinny&x=0&y=0

They look painful!!

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2013/03/22/american-eagle-s-spray-on-skinny-skinny-jeans-a-joke.html

That's funny, because AE says it is. These are painted on.

Good for the potency!!

Clearly paint. If you carefully pause it at highest quality you can see her fine bum fuzz (I bet).

I hate it when I have to shave crotch on my jeans.

Don't forget to shave before putting on AE Skinny Skinnies.

http://www.ae.com/web/browse/skinnyskinnylanding.jsp

DOH!!

Kept the dream alive as long as I could....

I have a bucket of paint if you transcend your affinity for process cloth. That's the step right before transcending your flesh completely. So admit you're a douche not fit for this world and then you will go to one that is better.

Thank you internet! *TEARS OFF FLESH AND GOES FORWARD SCREAMING IN HAPPINESS*