Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

But seriously, don't say anything even remotely amusing until the 28th - you don't want to blow your load early.

I'll help by making creepy comparisons between commenting and ejaculation.

Psh

Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

That's perfect - way to save it up.>> ^Drax:

Psh

You should just give T-Shirts to people who reach some arbitrary Silver Tongue level, say... 10 for example...

Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

booooooring. I mean, good job - keep saving it up.>> ^KnivesOut:

You should just give T-Shirts to people who reach some arbitrary Silver Tongue level, say... 10 for example...

This is just one of those taxocrat statist SCAMS that are CLEARLY outlined by the bible:

Ezekiel 20:25-26 I also gave them over to comments that were not good and contest-rules they could not live by; I let them become defiled through their gifts—the T-Shirts—that I might fill them with horror so they would know that I am the DAG.

Ron Paul 2012.

Like I'm going to give you all my best lines.

Oh, and *frontpage.

Printing this post atop the VideoSift homepage - frontpage requested by lucky760.

Oh dear... it will feel like an 80s comedy club all up in here.

Prepare for a merciless shish kabobbin'!

>> ^dag:

But seriously, don't say anything even remotely amusing until the 28th - you don't want to blow your load early.
I'll help by making creepy comparisons between commenting and ejaculation.


Seems like everyone in this thread is edging...

9/11

Cool, finally a competition where I have a snowball's chance in hell to win a prize!

@mintbbb you won a prize in the anonymous video contest, the stay puft contest (grand prize), the lard lad giveaway and the magnet giveaway! your comment confuses me...

I'm definitely going to lose this one

>> ^residue:

@mintbbb you won a prize in the anonymous video contest, the stay puft contest (grand prize), the lard lad giveaway and the magnet giveaway! your comment confuses me...


Yes, I mean, I won in all of those. But I do not comment on videos. If I do, I am not witty, smart or funny. I am usually just upset if I comment. And English is not my first language, so making comments is really hard for me. During my 3+ years in VS I have gotten 8 applauded comments, which are mostly symphaty votes.

So, I am serious. It was not a sarcastic comment. I feel bad for winning so much lately. Thank God, on this one, I am not up and running.

"Is your vagina dry or are you just sad to see me?"

That's my rapist wit.

Oh you said rapier. Sorry.

hah, i completely mis-interpreted your post somehow.. i'm dumb apparently

>> ^mintbbb:

>> ^residue:
@mintbbb you won a prize in the anonymous video contest, the stay puft contest (grand prize), the lard lad giveaway and the magnet giveaway! your comment confuses me...

Yes, I mean, I won in all of those. But I do not comment on videos. If I do, I am not witty, smart or funny. I am usually just upset if I comment. And English is not my first language, so making comments is really hard for me. During my 3+ years in VS I have gotten 8 applauded comments, which are mostly symphaty votes.
So, I am serious. It was not a sarcastic comment. I feel bad for winning so much lately. Thank God, on this one, I am not up and running.

What if someone leaves a really enlightening anecdote that they pour their soul into, and it moves a lot of people to up-vote, but it's not funny?

Lol, np, I have trouble expressing myself That's why I try not to comment. I know what I am good at, and just try to stick to it

>> ^residue:

hah, i completely mis-interpreted your post somehow.. i'm dumb apparently
>> ^mintbbb:
>> ^residue:
@mintbbb you won a prize in the anonymous video contest, the stay puft contest (grand prize), the lard lad giveaway and the magnet giveaway! your comment confuses me...

Yes, I mean, I won in all of those. But I do not comment on videos. If I do, I am not witty, smart or funny. I am usually just upset if I comment. And English is not my first language, so making comments is really hard for me. During my 3+ years in VS I have gotten 8 applauded comments, which are mostly symphaty votes.
So, I am serious. It was not a sarcastic comment. I feel bad for winning so much lately. Thank God, on this one, I am not up and running.

>> ^Ryjkyj:

What if someone leaves a really enlightening anecdote that they pour their soul into, and it moves a lot of people to up-vote, but it's not funny?

What if someone is unintentionally funny?

Why don't you just give me all 5 shirts and spare us all the horrible jokes and awkward obligatory upvoting?

What if someone is just funny-looking?

What are the down vote rules? Are you going to allow more for fierce competition or less for "fairness"?

Same as always, if someone downvotes your comment, you downvote 100 of their videos and try to get their real life information.

Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

Doesn't have to be funny. Profound works too.>> ^Ryjkyj:

What if someone leaves a really enlightening anecdote that they pour their soul into, and it moves a lot of people to up-vote, but it's not funny?

Too bad I'm only funny in the Sift Lounge...

How am I supposed to affect a disaffected and aloof sense of humor when I'm competing for fabulous prizes?

I doubt I'll win this one. My humor is like nails on a chalkboard.

This is gonna be a rough couple weeks.

does that shirt come in size "tin can"?>> ^siftbot:

>> ^Ornthoron:
Too bad I'm only funny in the Sift Lounge...

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA ...

So... the winner will be decided by how many people he can get to click through and upvote?

Sweet.

>> ^rottenseed:

does that shirt come in size "tin can"?>> ^siftbot:
>> ^Ornthoron:
Too bad I'm only funny in the Sift Lounge...

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA ...



You can do better.

No sift wit is rapey-er than @blankfist's.

http://videosift.com/search?q=rape&t=c&u=blankfist&o=hivotes&vmin=&vmax=&sh=&l=&n=&b=&submit=Search

If we start another Sift Roast in the same time period, things could get really interesting.

then you shouldn't have married him...HEYYYYYOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!>> ^Issykitty:

What if someone is just funny-looking?

>> ^Ornthoron:

If we start another Sift Roast in the same time period, things could get really interesting.


Hopefully we can avoid any events where the comment upvoting reaches masturbatory levels.

Be careful what you wish for . . . >> ^Ornthoron:

If we start another Sift Roast in the same time period, things could get really interesting.

I wonder if dag'll try to upstage everyone again and do another hat trick ban? He's a fucking riot that way.

Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

Much anger I sense in you. Leaking from other threads it is.

>> ^blankfist:

I wonder if dag'll try to upstage everyone again and do another hat trick ban? He's a fucking riot that way.

No anger, chief. Just annoyed with your one-sided antics. Carry on, blowhard.

Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

Not me. I've already gone through manopause. >> ^rougy:

So which of you is on the rag this time?

Thou shalt not motorboat yer bewbs.

So that's what that was!?!?>> ^Issykitty:

Thou shalt not motorboat yer bewbs.

>> ^dag:

Not me. I've already gone through manopause. >> ^rougy:
So which of you is on the rag this time?



Manopause...that's where a dude can't get it up any more, isn't it?



And hey! What's not funny about menstruation? Cracks me up every time!

And note the dystopian, deconstructive antithesis of my menstruation allusion apropos of the original ejaculatory metaphor?

Took me hours to do that!

Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

(tap tap). Is this thing on?>> ^rougy:

>> ^dag:
Not me. I've already gone through manopause. >> ^rougy:
So which of you is on the rag this time?



Manopause...that's where a dude can't get it up any more, isn't it?

And hey! What's not funny about menstruation? Cracks me up every time!
And note the dystopian, deconstructive antithesis of my menstruation allusion apropos of the original ejaculatory metaphor?
Took me hours to do that!

Dag(s): Mammal that turns my quest for a Diamond into a long, painful journey full of hilarity and weird Europeans.

I was gonna skewer someone with my rapist wit, but I don't want sloppy seconds after @blankfist.

>> ^gwiz665:

I was gonna skewer someone with my rapist wit, but I don't want sloppy seconds after @blankfist.


Karma whoring.

>> ^deathcow:

>> ^Ornthoron:
If we start another Sift Roast in the same time period, things could get really interesting.

Hopefully we can avoid any events where the comment upvoting reaches masturbatory levels.


click-click-click-click-click-click-click-click-Click-CLICK-CLICKCLINKCLICK...

Ahhhhhhhhh...

Out of curiosity, I took a look at the highest voted comment ever submitted, and this is it, submitted by @MarineGunrock.

If you can motorboat your own boobs, you shouldn't hide that light under a bushel.
>> ^Issykitty:

Thou shalt not motorboat yer bewbs.

Anything worth doing, is worth doing well.

^that has served me well.

*crickets*

Just save your breath Dag...you'll need it to inflate your date.

Wait, now I'm just confused. I thought we were just supposed to insult Dag here in this sifttalk.

>> ^lucky760:

Out of curiosity, I took a look at the highest voted comment ever submitted, and this is it, submitted by @MarineGunrock.


Thanks, @lucky760. I hadn't seen that one by MarineGunrock before--I upvoted it--now at 109 and counting.

What-the-holy-Fuck?

I didn't even think I would be in the running. :& (<- that's tongue tied)
I wish I hadn't even seen this update--now I'll be crushed when @blankfist downvotes my comment.
(And I wish I could go back and type friends instead of friend)

I am here to officially announce that I am joining the Democratic Party, voting for Obama in 2012, joining Green Peace, lowering my carbon footprint, believe 100% that global warming is man made, am pro-choice, an atheist, think socialism is way cool, and want to increase my taxes twelvefold.

Is that enough to win this?

>> ^blankfist:

I am here to officially announce that I am joining the Democratic Party, voting for Obama in 2012, joining Green Peace, lowering my carbon footprint, believe 100% that global warming is man made, am pro-choice, an atheist, think socialism is way cool, and want to increase my taxes twelvefold.
Is that enough to win this?


No.

Well, I'm honored to be in the running.

And it's not for nothing that a long and versatile tongue is not simply a function of wit and sarcasm, but its very shape and form has, indeed, been associated with enlightenment, with Buddhahood, as is cultivated through yoga, tantra, and other forms of kundalini meditation.. and evidenced by glossalalia, "speaking in tongues," quali, "Song of Solomon kisses like wine," etc. etc...

Even the fetal development of the oral cavity is due, in part, to the secretion of sweet-tasting muco-polysaccharides from the “heavenly” cranial vault in the newly forming roof of the fetal mouth.. known for millenia within Hindu traditions, and only recently suggested by scientific research.

A colleague of mine states that the physiological basis of spiritual experience -- the body's "natural LSD-Ecstasy" with no side effects, only natural maturities -- constitutes a long tongue and versatile tongue.

>> ^Boise_Lib:

>> ^blankfist:
I am here to officially announce that I am joining the Democratic Party, voting for Obama in 2012, joining Green Peace, lowering my carbon footprint, believe 100% that global warming is man made, am pro-choice, an atheist, think socialism is way cool, and want to increase my taxes twelvefold.
Is that enough to win this?

No.


PHEW!

Downvote ALL the comments!

[redacted by request of submitter]

Did I win?

I made the list yesterday with this but I also don't want a creepy giant mouth shirt.

Your call whether to put me on the list or not.

Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

We're tabulating the results. Hold onto your hats.

Wait! Don't tabulate them just yet! I need to downvote Trancecoach's comment like he did mine... okay done. Now we're even. Booya!

LOL at blankfist literally clawing his way to victory, using downvotes and dozens of powerpoints to make it to the top. Like a boss.

Ok, so how does this work? I'm ready to make witty, timely comments.

I think this entire contest is part of a larger false flag op, designed to draw attention away from the 911 attacks. You and your operatives have lured political malcontents to this site with a combination of videos featuring boobs, cats and far left/far right agitprop/disinfo. Once mentally enslaved, you 1) force these captives to compete for 'power points' (which are not tied to any kind of gold standard), 2) create conflicts among them to keep them occupied, which in turn keeps them from becoming politically active outside the site, and 3) create this contest which just so happens blow right past the 10 year anniversary of 9/11 to 9/12, nullifying all of our voices.

And you almost got away with it. But now you have a full blown mutiny on your hands. Commence DNS attack in 3.. 2.. 1..

>> ^dystopianfuturetoday:

LOL at blankfist literally clawing his way to victory, using downvotes and dozens of powerpoints to make it to the top. Like a boss.


Well, I wasn't gonna downvote, but ol' Trancy pulled one out at the last minute so I returned in kind. As for the powerpoints, that I cannot deny. Shameless.

>> ^kymbos:

Ok, so how does this work? I'm ready to make witty, timely comments.


Best Comment on This Thread!

What makes you think it was me?

>> ^blankfist:

Wait! Don't tabulate them just yet! I need to downvote Trancecoach's comment like he did mine... okay done. Now we're even. Booya!

>> ^Trancecoach:

What makes you think it was me?
>> ^blankfist:
Wait! Don't tabulate them just yet! I need to downvote Trancecoach's comment like he did mine... okay done. Now we're even. Booya!


Ha. You can hover your cursor over the downarrow and see who downvoted. Busted.

Did I win?!?!?!?

Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

Last time, to the *frontpage Siftbot.

Printing this post atop the VideoSift homepage - frontpage requested by dag.

hey, why was I removed?!?

>> ^dag:

Last time, to the frontpage Siftbot.

@dag @lucky760 What gives?

This comment got 36 votes and acc to the server time (mouse over text) it was submitted on Aug 28th @ 7:17.

I'm feeling a bit disenfranchised.

Yeah,
My my comment was REMOVED for some reason.

This is crap.

>> ^JiggaJonson:

@dag @lucky760 What gives?
This comment got 36 votes and acc to the server time (mouse over text) it was submitted on Aug 28th @ 7:17.
I'm feeling a bit disenfranchised.

Wonder how many powerpoints blankfist paid to dag to make the competition go away?


>> ^Trancecoach:

Yeah,
My my comment was REMOVED for some reason.
This is crap.
>> ^JiggaJonson:
@dag @lucky760 What gives?
This comment got 36 votes and acc to the server time (mouse over text) it was submitted on Aug 28th @ 7:17.
I'm feeling a bit disenfranchised.

Pardon our dust. There was a mistake in our tally causing comments from Aug 28 to be excluded. We're retallying and the corrected list of winners will be provided shortly.

tie for 5th?

BWAHAHAHA! The capitalist wins again! Gather around my dearest children and let uncle blankfist tell you of the time he promoted a shitty comment into infamy!

I realized early on that my comment here wouldn't be enough to win this contest on its own. Maybe it would get 15 votes, maybe a bit more, but I knew I wasn't smart enough nor witty enough to win this without promoting that video a lot. And by a lot I mean 13 times.

See? I invested my capital to increase my comment's visibility. In this instance, the power points were my capital. Think of how marketers manipulate you into buying their shitty products by plastering billboards of it everywhere. It's called brand reinforcement. You see it enough, you want it. And you all must've really wanted my comment to win. So I thank each and every one of you.

Comment hidden because you are ignoring dag. (show it anyway)

Yes, tie for 5th. @DerHasisttot gets a tee too! >> ^JiggaJonson:

tie for 5th?

It's all starting to make sense now. >> ^blankfist:

BWAHAHAHA! The capitalist wins again! Gather around my dearest children and let uncle blankfist tell you of the time he promoted a shitty comment into infamy!
I realized early on that my comment here wouldn't be enough to win this contest on its own. Maybe it would get 15 votes, maybe a bit more, but I knew I wasn't smart enough nor witty enough to win this without promoting that video a lot. And by a lot I mean 13 times.
See? I invested my capital to increase my comment's visibility. In this instance, the power points were my capital. Think of how marketers manipulate you into buying their shitty products by plastering billboards of it everywhere. It's called brand reinforcement. You see it enough, you want it. And you all must've really wanted my comment to win. So I thank each and every one of you.

I knew BF was the best rapiest!

>> ^blankfist:

She's advertising. He's buying. Problem?

Wow, some contest. More time and intellect was put into writing the contest description then actual winning comments. It's sad state to see that anal snogging and cartman clown cliques still garner the most votes in a display of circlejerkism.

A wild JOEDIRT appeared!

There was a contest?

>> ^joedirt:

>> ^blankfist:
She's advertising. He's buying. Problem?
Wow, some contest. More time and intellect was put into writing the contest description then actual winning comments. It's sad state to see that anal snogging and cartman clown cliques still garner the most votes in a display of circlejerkism.


*than

>> ^dystopianfuturetoday:

A wild JOEDIRT appeared!

Dft uses pokemon reference.

This contest made me wonder what the highest downvoted comment on the Sift was. So far I've only spotted a "-26."
http://videosift.com/video/Youdiejoe-s-vid-of-the-2009-SoCal-siftup?loadcomm=1#comment-630770

Westy has a -69

http://videosift.com/search?q=&t=c&u=&o=lovotes&vmin=&vmax=&sh=&l=&n=&b=&submit=Search

We should have a worst comment contest. Top prize: AIDS.

It's super effective.
>> ^luxury_pie:

>> ^dystopianfuturetoday:
A wild JOEDIRT appeared!

Dft uses pokemon reference.