DISCUSSIONS FROM:

http://www.videosift.com/video/Police-Brutality-Denmark



Guys, as much as this all sound nice and happy, 'hugging' and 'persuading' just wouldn't work in certain areas. I'll come right out and say you guys are being delusional here.

Just with that video kronospeidon posted:



(In reply to this comment by kronosposeidon:
We've got the same thing in America! This is how New York cops hug cyclists:

)




That biker probably ignored the cop's orders to stop and attempts to weave through. So cop had to use necessary force to stop him.

You might say 'you can be nice while enforcing the rule'. Oh yeah? You think these guys would give their own time, purposely stop for you and wait for you to order you around? Not in NYC at least.

You think nice words would've made him stop instead? He would've past right through without a glance. If he had listened to the first warning and stopped, sure, give him a hug, a kiss, a reach-around and what have you. But when you fail to obey, you gotta crack the whips in order to make them listen.


Do I think all that force was necessary just to enforce someone to wear a helmet? No, I do think it was excessive. But that's not the issue here. The main point I'm discussing here is that 'nice words would NOT have stopped this man'.

If the biker had listened to the cop in the first place, this never would've happened. But he purposely ignored the cop giving orders to stop.




I currently work in a Gym in New York City, and I've got a bunch of meatheads from the city coming in to the gym and do whatever they wanna do. They're all pumped up from the energy drinks and dumbells. They're hyper, loud and full of testosterone.

I was nice to them back when I first started working here. But then they how far they can push the line, and they test you over and over and over. You have to put your foot down otherwise you're the only one getting hurt. They don't see you as a person, but merely as a 'worker they can take advantage of'

You give someone a break, and the next day they ask for the same thing, and then something else. And if you allow this to continue, they'll keep pushing until they get everything.

They don't limit themselves, and then the rules go haywire. They ask to get a break. But then what happens to other members who adhere to those rules? They ask for the same favor now, and the rules are no longer valid.




You wanna know how my day goes? Let's say someone is not wearing proper gym attire. Trying to work out while they're still in their Jeans. I call out their name to tell them it's not allowed in here. And guess what, they just walk right past you.

But they DID hear you, but they CHOOSE to ignore it. They know that once they're past the front desk and into the main floor, they think it's a done deal. Because nobody wants to chase after a person, either because they're lazy or because it's not worth it.

But I personally get out of my station and chase them down. They call me a hard-ass for doing that. But I only do it because ONLY THEN they listen to you. Otherwise all they do is get past the front gate as fast as possible, not make eye contact, pretending to listen to their IPOD. And then do whatever the hell they want once they're inside the gym. Ignoring all the guidelines and rules.




This one time the guy knew I was following him downstairs to give him a warning, so he decides to go into the spinning bike room and locks the door. You can see right through the plastic windows. I know he can see me, but he CHOOSES to ignore me, pretending to ride the bike with his head down.

I knock on the door, mouthing 'come out'. You know what he does? He pretends he can't hear me over the loud music playing on the overhead sound system... LOL Is he in middle school? you might ask. Nope, the guy was 32 years old.




Guess what, this happened perhaps at least 3 times a week when I first started working at the gym. Back when I was being the 'nice cop'. Nowdays I don't give a damn about their feelings or whatever lame excuse they gotta give. I don't do them favors nor do I care what they have to say. And guess what, only after I act like an asshole was when they started listening to me.

Even still, there's still one or two people (sometimes girls, especially the ones in their late 20s to mid 30s) trying the same shit on me per week. I admit I'm still not used to dealing with these types. I feel uneasy when I have to 'act' tough and be an asshole. But you gotta do what you gotta do in order to enforce rules, otherwise nobody will listen to it.

Nowadays they know I don't do them any favors and know I'll do something about it when they ignore me, either by talking real loud about their bad behaviors and embarrassing them in front of everyone or putting a hold on their membership.



It's like being in a iron cage with a bunch of wolves. If you appear too nice, these fuckers will perceive you as 'weak'. And they take advantage of you until you do something about it. They try to assert themselves whenever they see an opening, it's like a fucking prison cell. Of course, not all of them are like that, but it only takes a few of them to push the line, and rest would mimic the same behavior because they now know it's possible.

And once they know how far they can push it, even the nice ones who never behaved such ways would start to do it. They learn from what others have been doing, so they learn to mimic the techniques and tries to pull off the same shit on you.

Environment you live in, and the culture that dominates is a scary thing. It really is.


That is why niceness is such a dangerous tool to use. It's a double edged sword.