Suck? No way.

That looks like a hella good time.

*promote

They got so much right on that one! Today, we actually have trucks and they use engines -- who could have possibly foreseen such wonders in the darkest ages of the late 1960s?! Surely, this is the result of witchcraft combined with technology and just a wee pinch of leaded gasoline and DDT.

Next week on "Our Amazing Future": an astounding device will wait until your wife is asleep and then deliver an unstoppable deluge of pornography directly to you from all over the world -- in COLOR!!

Military scientists are already hard at work on the "inter-net", by which the conveyance of rank smut into your bedroom will forever put to rest that embarrassing walk over to BIG TONY'S TIT-A-TORIUM for your weekly purchases of "Giant Goddamn Asses" and "Judy Hopps Confidential." Apparently you'll also be able to get news and culture and all that other who-cares bullshit, like anyone gives a fuck since there's gonna be way hella titties! And grey fur.

Can someone please recommend a good mental health specialist?

Y'know what? Seriously, fuck seagulls. I fucking hate seagulls. Y'know why? They're total cunts. You know why they're cunts? Because they're cunts. Seagulls are God's answer to "why do children get cancer?" God says, "Because fuck you, that's why! Here's a seagull, you asshole."
"Ohh, but they ate all the locusts and saved Salt Lake City!" people say. Fuck them, too. The only thing good that ever came outta SLC is Steve Young and he ended his career flat on his back and the Niners have sucked ever since. Except for Kap; we'll give 'em one for Kap. We totally woulda won that game if the other team hadn't been better. They can go fuck themselves, too.
Ok, check this out: I was walking on the beach near Pescadaro and eating this awesome fucking carne asada taco I got at the super-secret Mexican place in the gas station and it was fucking amazingly good. This is the kinda taco that if it was pussy, you'd marry it and not give a shit when it fucked your best friend and ran off to Vegas with all your money. Seriously, it was that good. And I'm eatin' this goddamn glorious taco and feeling like I'm on top of the world and all is right with the universe. Then a motherfucking seagull all Stuka-moves me and snatches my taco! I'm all, "DUDE!! That's hella my taco, BITCH!", but then I remembered that birds don't speak English so I was like "Fuck!"
Seriously, 'tho, that was totally a good taco and shit.
Fuck seagulls.

Dude, they're HELLA gonna bang that this!

this is a great song with an absolute shit animation. I have seen rule 34 with better animation. Actual animation frames replaced with tweening looks hella awkward. Also the story of the video..

I dont get it. There have been MANY music videos that have replicated the exact same setting. A music performance in a mad max post apocalyptic world. But instead of actually showing a performance they throw a ton of scenes that make no sense, no reasoning. Why would a performance be held with so few people? Why would a performance be held near a riot situation where people are lobbing cocktails? Who the hell would do such a thing?

And yet here we are, another music video who thinks they can pull the same story board and creates yet another ridiculously believable video. Many videos feed off the energy of a live event and synergize with the crowd, and they rock. Then there are those videos who think they are a 4 minute movie and F_ it all up.

(Intro)
Okay y’all. One thousand words in two minutes
Let’s do this
Yo...
(Verse 1)
In a couple minutes I'ma have to kill it
All the haters that just sit up on the web
But they will say that they don't feel it
But I'm never gonna listen to these idiots who dumb as fuck
I'll punch 'em and I'll kick 'em and I'll hit 'em with an uppercut
They told me that I got a record that I gotta break it
Get your woman naked in the garden she’ll be talking stank
I’ll fill my lungs up full of air and bust you till I hyperventilate
A thousand words, a hundred twenty seconds imma get it straight
I'ma grab the mothafuckin' sun and take a bite of it
I see a rapper try to say he sick but he a vitamin
You know that Mr Mac up on the track like it's a Viking ship
I rip the fucking beat up in to bits when I go psycho quick
All the ladies in the world is like "I love you, Mac"
I fry their brain up in your fuckin' noggin' when I bust a rap
I find a beat I really wanna kill and then I do
And all the mumble rappers in the game are dumb and sounding stupid
I’m an artist with a plan and stacking money in the videos
If that shit is a gimmick, tell the truth I wanna spit it slow
You don’t like the way that I be rappin’ fuckin’ sue me
I’ma get up on the stage and whip it out, just call me Louis
I’ma kill the crew but danny Mac is lethal with the skill
I am the king, I order you to have a pizza every meal
You acting cheesy like a bag of Doritos
I swear to god I’ll tape your mouth shut and throw you in the back of a vehicle
I’m a missile with the flow, I’m like a rapid torpedo
I got a gun up in my hand the size of Danny Devito
But now you sinkin’ like the fuckin’ Titanic
If anybody want a piece of this I’m thinner skinned and having to plan
Now listen to me, I don’t give a fuck about the shit that rappers meant
The world of fuckin’ choppin’
There’s a hundred million chapters baby
I could probably squat a fuckin’ elephant for fifty reps
I need to breathe a little bit of air right now and get my breath
I climb right up the wall like I’m a ninja with a weapon
I’m an angel and I’m evil pulling bitches up in heaven
Everybody call me Lethal, I’ve been rapping twenty years
And walk on water like I’m Jesus only rappin for the cheers before
I get up in the ring and fight a rapper I'm a black belt
And my hands on broken glass so I can leave the fucker battered
I’ma hit them with a bat right in the head until they dead
And make him take back all the dumb and stupid words he ever said
Let me take a breath so I can get back on the drums again
And sneak up on you like I’m the Phantom of the Opera
With a mask over my face but my teeth under your throat
And then I’m drinkin’ every droplet of your motherfucking blood, my friend
I’m just a product of Peter, the clip will pop in the heater
I got the spots of a cheeta
So when the gotta da vida
You better walk away
I’m rapping like a lunatic up on the mic and post it up on YouTube for the stupid chips
(Where’d you go?!)
(Verse 2)
So let me take another breath, I’m lookin’ hella dope
And I’ve been poppin’ since I made the pancakes cook up on the stove
And all you rappers up on YouTube had to treat me like the pope
‘Cause I’m the fuckin’ original
And you’re just huffing the chemicals and you’re just suckin’ like tentacles
Anybody this lyrical better just know I’m coming with the illest flow ever
Tryna kick that bull shit, you get your toes severed
Flames comin’ out my lungs you know I’m crushin’ every drum that ever popped up in the war path
Burning everything that I can see or smell or hear
That starts a fire in the sky and that’s the mother fucking forecast
People wanna say “Mac just raps fast. Really, he ain’t sayin’ shit”
You just mad ‘cause you can’t speak alien
Let’s do it
Gotta spit a lot of fuckin’ words in just a little time
I’m about to put a bomb inside your soul so I can blow your mind
I make it look so easy everybody wanna try it
But your lungs will probably suffocate and then you’ll end up dying
I’ma take a sword and cut my fuckin’ capillaries open
Lava coming out my mouth and all my raps are fuckin’ smokin’
Anybody wanna try to play the game with Mac is losin’
I be comin’ like a wolverine and show my teeth and chew ‘em
I’ma bite a silly rapper on the throat until he bleedin’
I’ll be taking every dollar out your pocket, now we even
I’ll be taking every crumb right off your plate, that’s how I’m eating
What the fuck you gonna do? I‘ll crack your soul and then I reach in
I’m the best that ever did this, other raps, they’re not a match for me
You gotta know that I can drop a line so hard it cracks a tree
I poke you in the eyeball with a microbe
Now you have to see that when I rap I don’t have to breathe

Oh shit! Two minutes and three seconds!
Well that was one thousand and thirty words
New world fuckin’ record! Yeah!
Oh shit... new world record

Seems like it took hella long for the cops to get there?

Dayum! Give that guy some promotion! That was hella smooth!

*promote Say what? That's one hella way to harsh a buzz ...

Lyrics -

Verse 1

Blowin something sticky word to pre-cum dicks
Im wit ma team in this bitch, and we all getting lit
I mean the weed hella loud, like a teenage chick
And we been smoking for a minute, yeah we blowin on that ganja

And now I'm huffin and puffin, I'm choking on that bong
And the dope im on is bomb I'm smoking that Vietcong

Getting real high
Watching funny videos of bill nye
Tell me that this jam isn't still fly --

Bill nye theme song

now im getting hungry than a muthafucka
put some chicken nuggets in the oven at 400
whered I put that honey mustard
lookin all around the cupboard for that muthafucka
until I discovered a custard, I covered wit butter from last week.

How long do them thangs keep?
Guess I better ask jeeves
go get ma computer but im staring at the damn screen

Damn D, you forgetting what ya task be
The puff puff pass, gotcha gassed
Now ya man is fucked...

Chorus

And i was tryna get a little buzz, so I took a little puff
but I think im way too high

and I aint wanna come off like a bitch, so I took another hit
but I think ma brains too fried

and yeah im fuckin faded but I hate it
im praying that I make it
afraid im goin to dieeeee

I'm too blazed, it's too late
to save Dicky from this fuckin place, cuz he too high

Verse 2

now im freakin out up in this bitch
cant control it and ma homies passin round another spliff
so I bolted to the BR
Consulted with the mirror

Lil Dicky please step up, you pathetic
Cuz the weed in you beating you
then all a sudden im on the toilet beating ma penis blue
but I aint cummin because as im imagining fucking something

that pretty girl im humping
becoming my fuckin cousin, or mother or brother
or some other fucking disgusting person

ma brain is bein strange, cuz im high as a plane
I aint deranged, im just saying it's a violent strain
So I go back to the back where they packing up cigars
Dipping snacks, kicking back, staring at some Avatars

Then I flipped, took a decade and a half to make that shit
Yet they couldn't put a second and a half up in that script

How the fuck a human being wanna fuck a
Blueish green 7' 3'' tail having ass thing
Man im high as fuckkkk

Chorus

And i was tryna get a little buzz, so I took a little puff
but I think im way too high

and I aint wanna come off like a bitch, so I took another hit
but I think ma brains too fried

and yeah im fuckin faded but I hate it
im praying that I make it
afraid im goin to dieeeee

I'm too blazed, it's too late
to save Dicky from this fuckin place, cuz he too high

verse 3

rock hard cock, cuz im watching katy perry
in her video the whole world's made of candy

damn...I aint even got no candy
so now at the fucking c store

where ya man be torn than a mafucka
peanut eminems or a twix
cant commit, so I count the benefits on ma hands

goddamn now im weary of the man -- yeah the cashier
homeland, Nazir!

s-s-s-so damn tweaked I cant even cross the mothafuckin street
gotta wait until that muthafucka's green

now im back up at the crib, and im laughin at giraffes long necks
gotta shit, but the path to the bathroom is complex
crafted a long text, took about an hour
took a scary shower, now im sitting naked on the ground

man im fucked up. I'm bout to call ma mom up and tell her what's up.
This sucks im high as fuck.

Chorus

And i was tryna get a little buzz, so I took a little puff
but I think im way too high

and I aint wanna come off like a bitch, so I took another hit
but I think ma brains too fried

and yeah im fuckin faded but I hate it
im praying that I make it
afraid im goin to dieeeee

I'm too blazed, it's too late
to save Dicky from this fuckin place, cuz he too high

outtro

That looks hella fun.

I don't get why the fuck you would do this in the first place? Those dudes were pulling hella hard. *I* wanted to punch them in the face for that douchebaggery.

What the fuck dudes? What is wrong with you? This is how you get noticed? Just ask her out. Christ. Are we in fucking middle school here? This is why so many dudes are afraid to approach women. We've programmed them to be automatically full-defensive mode. I'm talkin deflector shields, weapons locked, targeting systems at the ready. Guys, seriously. Stop being dicks.

Daaaaaaaamn! I ain't been "You're the wizard stoned" in AGES!

Every now and then, I get a little misty-eye'd for the days of yore when ultra-high-grade pot wasn't available at every corner store.

I recall the days of lurking narcs in city parks; being out in the middle of a drought; going to a head shop to buy a bong then getting kicked out 'cuz I asked for it wrong (the magic word was "Tobacco", not "pot", you twat!)

The pot was stemmy, the sellers seedy, and I didn't care because I was hella needy.

But once a year, just 'fore November, would come the time I most remember because it was in those shortening days when I'd hear a rumor of Purple Haze, Ghost Train OG -- I'd be stoned for DAYS! Finally, the good stuff came from coastal plots, a plethora of the finest pots; time to dance and restore my stash: shit, I might even score some HASH!

My friends would come by and we'd all get high, never aware of time passing us by. We laughed, we munched, we floated along with hits from the joints and pulls from the bong. We never imagined dabs or wax, we were satisfied with bud: nothing wrong with those facts.

Now I buy an a gram or two -- Dirty Girl; Gorilla Glue -- and satisfied that my wife's in bed, I once again become a Head. I remember all those days gone by when there was no greater goal than just getting high. I recall them fondly -- if somewhat hazy -- and know that life without pot is just a little too crazy.

Hella cool, thx. I was distracted (again).