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Zifnab and Ant Ascend to Galaxy Level

What comes after Crown Level? That question can finally be answered.

We're happy to announce the latest, and possibly last, star level - attainable by reaching 2,000 star points. It's an amazing achievement. In Zifnab's case that means that he has over 2,000 videos published on the Sift, and Ant is close behind him.
... more inside ...

Sift Up in Vancouver - Who's Coming, eh?

Just wanted to make another announcement that there's a Vancouver Sift Up happening in a couple of weeks.

In my last announcement we confirmed this list of great Sifters will be meeting up with Charms and me:
fedquip, djsunkid, fullerenedream (the new Mrs. djsunkid), fissionchips, and zifnab

Anyone else in the area up for it? If so, just reply here!

It'll be Thursday, Sept 25 @ 6:00pm at Fiddlehead Joe's (and Chef djsunkid has nominated himself to prepare a gourmet feast). Be there or be somewhere else.

Let the Videosift Roast begin! Zifnab takes center stage...

Welcome one and all to the videosift roast! Tonight we have a special treat as tonight's roastee is currently the Ranked Number #1 Zifnab!

What can be said about Zifnab that hasn't been said yet? (That is what we are going to find out...) He is a man who has contributed alot to the sift, and is likely to be the 2nd person to get their crown... That goes to show you that this guy doesn't have much of a life, especially since 1000 of his votes have been thanks to Zero Puncuation and beating everyone to posting it week after week...

As always, as my role as MC, I got to send Zifnab the famous Videosift Questionaire in hopes that he would reveal his darkest secrets to us so that we can exploit them... Here was the review!

1. What do you do when you are not at the computer?
Spend time with my family, read, play badminton, play volleyball, play pool, watch hockey.

2. What is your favorite of your posted videos?
hmm Tough one, I'd have to say these two:

Fry's 100 cups of coffee
My favorite Futurama bit.

Hockey Player Hit Through the glass.
Because I was at that game and I remember it fondly.

3. How many avatars have you had since being a member? What were (are) they?
I've had 6 so far. First dragon, second dragon, Gandalf for a change, dracolich for the Fortnight of Fright, Dragon Yin-Yang (didn't last too long), and my current dragon.

4. What non-self-involved site do you visit most often?
There's more to the interwebs than the sift?? Proably Slashdot and TSN.

5. If you had a time machine would you keep it clean?
Nope, I'd just go back in time to when it was clean.

6. What is your ratio of pairs of shoes to underwear?
umm I'd guess 1:10. I don't go counting my underwear very often.

7. Is that underwear boxer, brief, or birthday?
Brief.

8. Do you run a Mac OS, Windows, or Linux?
Windows and Linux when I can.

9. Would you most prefer to be involved in a monumental one-of-a-kind hiking expedition, working on a breakthrough cure for a debilitating illness , or presenting the discovery of a revolutionary new way to parse data?
Presenting the discovery of a revolutionary new way to parse data.

10. What is your favorite ice cream topping? Favorite (non-ice-cream-related) spice?
Ice cream topping, hmmm don't eat too much of it, I'd have to say strawberries.
Spice, Fresh ground pepper.

11. Are you a tits, ass, or legs man?
Yes.

12. What kind of pet(s) do you have? Include name(s).
15 un-named fish.

13. What kind of pelt(s) do you have? Include name(s).
Fred.

14. What is your favorite kind of soup?
Hot and Sour

15. What is your most frequented source of news?
Radio while I drive in to work.

16. What is your beverage (poison) of choice?
Fresh squeezed orange juice (Yes I'm boring, I don't drink alchohol).

17. Have you ever been arrested?
Nope

18. What’s your go-to move for making a good first impression?
I just try to be friendly and chat with people.

19. How would you describe your coif: bangs, balding or rug?
Balding.

20. Is your face clean-shaven or do you have a beard, a goatee or a mustache?
Clean-shaven

21. List your five most cherished possessions.
Family pictures, Wedding Ring, Pool Table, Autographed Trevor Linden jersey (see hockey vid above), Computer

22. What religion, if any, did you practice as a child?
None.

23. What about now?
None.

24. What is your favorite memory?
My son's birth and my wedding day.

25. What was your favorite childhood television show?
Knight Rider

26. How would you describe your personal style/sense of fashion/taste for life/artistic flair?
Contemporary

27. What is a reason not to go to Burning Man?
As cool as it is, it's not my type of crowd.

28. Who is your favorite Sift Hero?
mlx (She is missed)

29. Do you have any image(s) of yourself online that you're willing to share?
Maybe...

30. What goal to you have while a Videosift member?
To take over the sift and rule with an iron thumb! Or at least get a crown...

31. Do you upvote comments more for their originality, sense of humor, or self-deprecation?
Originality and sense of humor.

32. Who started calling you the “Dark Lord of Videosift”?
MycroftHomlz when he called me out for a sifquisition when I hit 20,000 votes. He also has a very strange playlist dedicated to me and yahtzee...

33. Do people seem to take shots at you because you’re the number one man?
Most of the shots seem to be over my posting of Zero Punctuation reviews and the number of votes they consistently get...

34. Do you blame Canada?
Yes and I'm glad

35. Are you a lover or a fighter?
Lover

36. Do you have room for an apprentice, O Dark Lord?
I'll accept applications, but be warned the path to the dark side is surprisingly easy.

37. How do you feel about Zero Punctuation? (Since you have posted the majority of the videos)
I really enjoy Zero Punctuation reviews, they still haven't gotten old for me. I laugh every time, if I didn't enjoy them I wouldn't sift them no matter how many votes I thought they'd get.

38. Who do you respect the most on videosift?
I'd still have to say mlx, but since she's not active anymore it would be krupo and firefly.

39. Do you consider yourself emotional?
A little bit, I don't get emotional very often.

40. Why am I asking so many questions?
To make it seem like you are doing your job.

There you have it... a Family man who cares about other people and members on the boards and blames his country for no reason...

Alright then... Ladies and Gentlemen! Let the Roast commence! Remember... You have about 2-3 hours before the Roastee Zifnab takes a shot at all the people who took a whack at him...

edit: Whoops... I just been informed that the roasts last for about 24-48 hours... sorry, but then again more time to roast right?

Videosift Roast announcement: Zifnab's turn to get toasty!

Greeting everyone... For the next roast, I'm actually going to be the MC and as luck would have it, Zifnab has been selected as the next person to get roasted...

I find this a bit ironic considering a few days ago I was the one who posting how Zifnab's vote count was over 30000... Anyway...

As you all know, Our little dark lord of the sift is currently numero uno and is loved and hated, though mostly loved...

From what we have discussed, we are going to perform the Roast on Friday around evening time, ergo be sure to get ready... For all the people who always wanted to take a jab at Zifnab for being where he is today, now is your chance...

Zifnab Vote Count: Its Over 30000!!!

Love or hate Zifnab, its hard to ignore the fact that he is the most popular person on the sift with over 30000 votes in his favor...

Congrats Zifnab on contributing so much to the site...
(Just get to 1000 stars so that you can get that crown...)

Make it big, baby! Now with a cheat sheet!

A while back I posted an article about how to make your videos bigger and better by simply doing a little math and then modifying the width and height parameters in the video embed codes. I’m glad to see that many of you have taken the message to heart by super-sizing your own videos. Still, most of you are leaving your videos the same old boring default size. C’mon, everyone knows that bigger is better! Why do you think everyone likes going to movies at theaters with big screens? Why do people like big screen televisions? That’s right: It makes their porn look better.

In an effort to boost the number of videos that are the maximum allowable size, I created a cheat sheet that lists all the major video hosts found here at the Sift, with both the old and new widths and heights so that you’ll know exactly what to change the dimensions to. Save it, print it, notarize it, insure it, laminate it, frame it, and hang it above your monitor. No more excuses, because with these numbers it will take you all of 15 seconds to change the width and height numbers after you’ve embedded the code. And if you can’t find the numbers that you’re looking for on this sheet, you can still do it the old-fashioned way by using **gulp** math.

Below the cheat sheet you will find many explanatory notes. They only need to be read once, so don’t treat them like the 90-day warranty on your new toaster. Just read them. Once. (That means you too, blankfist.)

Click to expand, and prepare to have your mind blown. Sort of.


Photobucket

- You might have noticed that the numbers aren’t perfectly aligned in either the horizontal or vertical axes. I made it while I was drinking. Deal with it.

- In my time at VideoSift, I have slowly but surely learned that there are literally hundreds (if not thousands) of video hosts spanning the globe. Therefore it would be impossible for me to make a cheat sheet to include every video host that you could find, and even if I could it would then no longer be a cheat sheet, but a cheat book. Therefore it’s much easier for me to refer you to my first post about upsizing videos if your video is not on the provided cheat sheet.

- If a video has a crappy resolution to start with, don’t bother upsizing it because it will only look worse. Most hosts these days have significantly improved video resolution quality, but there are still plenty of videos that still look like caca. I suggest leaving those alone.

- Some videos have embed codes that exceed the 540 pixel maximum width that VideoSift allows. So what do you do with those videos? Nothing. Lucky set it up so that videos which are too big will automatically downsize to the maximum allowed width. You won’t see this often, but College Humor sometimes posts embed codes with 640 pixels width. As I mentioned, they are automatically downsized to the maximum allowed width.

- Comedy Central is not on the cheat sheet. Pourquoi, you inquire? Well, I’ll show you why. If you alter the size of a Comedy Central video, it goes from looking like this:



To this:



Not exactly an improvement, n’est-ce pas? So just leave them alone. I’m guessing that there are a handful of other video hosts that have the same problem, so if you use an off-the-beaten-path video host the only way you’re going to discover this problem is when you view the preview screen right before you click the “Submit” button. Then you’ll need to click the “Modify” button to change the video’s dimensions back to their default settings IF they pull a Comedy Central number on you. You live, you learn.

- Dailymotion video embeds are unique, in that they have no “standard” size for their videos to start with. Anyone who has embedded more than a few of their videos will vouch for this. Therefore I chose the most common embed dimensions I’ve found and upsized their numbers to the maximum allowed. Now if you’re lazy, and if you’re reading this then there’s a good chance you are, you can always click the “customize player…” link below the embed code on any video, and then check the “large” box for the ‘player size’ option. That will automatically increase the video width to 520 pixels, which is damn close to the 540 maximum. Good enough for government work.

- Fora.tv, iFilm, and VSocial were not included because even though they are preferred video hosts, they are RARELY used. Refer to my original post if you want to upsize their videos.

- Funnyordie.com was included, even though they are not one of the ‘preferred providers’, only because they have a significant number of videos on the Sift. Okay, half of them are mine, but still, they are a force to be reckoned with. I’m not reality, just its spokesman.

- Vimeo also didn’t make the cheat sheet, but only because they make customizing video size a breeze. When you grab the embed code from Vimeo, you first click “EMBED” on the video screen, and then you click the “Customize size, color, and other options” link. All you have to do after that is enter “540” in the first (width) box, and then Vimeo automatically adjusts the height for you. You can also adjust the menu color on the same screen, if you’re so inclined.

- YouTube recently changed their default player size from 425 width x 355 height to 425 width x 344 height. Therefore all of you who've been automatically plugging in the old 451 height number need to take note of this change. If you still use the old 451 height nothing bad will happen. You'll just see thin black bars on the top and bottom of the video. Not the end of the world, but it will still look a little better if you use the new 437 height when maxing the video size.

A Call For A Siftquisition: Zifnab

Zifnab has just reached, by my count, a little over 20000 votes. At this point, in the Sift's life I think we need to ask ourselves the question:

How much is too much?

Zifnab consistently sift's quality content. Pounding out 6 videos at a time. What is the problem? Where does that leave the rest of us?

I will tell you where... The rest of us have crap to sift. I submit these as evidence:

1. http://www.videosift.com/video/3-Rabbits-Fight

2. http://www.videosift.com/video/Kinetic-sculpture-Clouds-by-Troika

3. http://www.videosift.com/video/Kiti-Hendrix

4. http://www.videosift.com/video/Basset-Hound-Beat-Box

Utter crap I tell you. I think, in light of this, Zifnab should be banned. And his votes and videos dispersed among us all equally... The Dark Lord's time has come to end.


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