My first memory is actually from around 18-20 months old, I crayoned on my grandmothers new fancy wallpaper and she spanked the shit out of me. It made an impression.
My next memory was just a few months later when I crawled out on the beams about 25-30 ft up over our unfinished atrium while our house was being built. My mom caught me out there and had to pretend everything was fine to coax me back.
By 3.5 years old I had plenty of memories of wrong stuff I had done and near death experiences.

Oof…Huckabee Sanders caught AGAIN falsifying spending reports to steal money, this time dozens of $1400 payments to “account test” at 123 report street, Anytown Ar, 79999 (a zip code in El Paso Tx btw).
What do you think the chances are she’s paying a company that doesn’t exist at a fantasy nonsensical address and not just pocketing $1400 every few weeks?
And then it was discovered that $54000 was allegedly paid by the state at her direction to a mom and pop diner for “consulting-political”…the diner owners say they were not paid a dime and know nothing about consulting.

Or mom's just taking the opportunity to teach the kid how to swing.

In all seriousness though, my mom broke her ankle last year just falling backward while gardening. Bad angle and poor bone density worsened the fall. So even a feet or two could cause major damage.

Back in my day, my mom would promise me not to slap me silly for 2 days, top.

Wonder what kind of bargain the kid made with mom

"Do my homework for one month and an extra hour before bedtime? Swear to God mom?"

My mom's favorite movie of all time. Upvoting in her name.

Good idea, but my parents would never have allowed that.

The house was a glass showcase, and my mom a perfectionist (which sucked to live under as a child). They paid a maintenance man to wash those windows regularly, a monumental task because some rooms like the living room had 20 ft ceilings with floor to ceiling glass walls! (Better, from the outside that room’s floor was 10+ ft off the ground, so he needed a 30 ft ladder!)
Just to attract more birds I guess, it also had a plant filled atrium in the center of the house with multiple full sized pine trees growing through the roof, so birds were tricked further into thinking nothing was there. My parents apparently didn’t consider the effects on wildlife when they built it, only their 360 degree views of it.

We moved out in around 82, and today it’s largely been rebuilt with a lot of the exterior glass removed.

My wife can't get pass this "Christmas dinner scene w/ mom" scene and so we stopped watching the show. The show got increasingly more chaotic and way too loud. The multi-directional conversations/screaming/yelling/smartass one-liners and worse of all, the "Yes. no......Yes... wait, wait... NO!" split second lines are too annoying (or cranked up to 12 if you prefer). My wife and I are too old for this.

well, maybe should have tempered it a bit, 'cause was a bit disturbed about some of the things I've been reading...

1) https://news.yahoo.com/montana-lawmaker-suggested-she-d-182144655.html (some seriously sick stuff)

2)https://www.npr.org/2023/06/27/1184461263/iowa-meteorologist-harassment-climate-change-quits (loons being led by power lushing putz)

3)https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/jun/26/garth-brooks-texas-greg-abbott-twitter-booed-satire (the stupidity and pride in ignorance is stupefying. also being ass hurt that trans people like a (horrible) beer?! lord have mercy...ate at a steak house, at the same table 'W' used previously. didn't put me off enjoying the t-bone. or revisiting the place if'n was in the area again. *did make me think "G** D*** it! why did the waitress tell me that!*)

4) https://news.yahoo.com/6-dead-including-3-children-161756984.html red flag af & TN will do nill

5) https://www.vice.com/en/article/ak3kz5/moms-for-liberty-hitler-quote (MFL were more upset w/asscoation then the message. The lack of self-awareness & irony - unreal)

6) & too many women dying from the abortion ban(s). don't get killing the living for the unborn if the unborn are d.o.a. & take mom w/them. lunacy.

a couple of those are pushing the limit. the lack of benignancy being a value among the right - just - ain't - right.

bob the parrot's stormtrooper comment lit the fuse. my gawd. even people in the middle ages had a sense of genetics. greeks, 3k years ago, knew androgyny was a thing. so why can't bobo's buds not bone up on the idea of biology?

it's not a choice, but living well is.

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Lizards aren’t newts/newts aren’t lizards…but it would have made exactly as much sense…I also raised lizards.
Dad called me newtboy after I started raising newts.
Mom called me possum since I can remember…but I never knew why.